Ready for Friday night

POV: You are a conservative (Politics on "No" column)

Imagine dating a conservative. Ew.
- Imagine dating and politics being such a polarizing dealbreaker you miss out on potential partners and good company
Could also be a radical leftist, i know from the experience tslking about the opressive nsture of capitalism and how were brainwashed by the media into a consumerist lifestyle isnt something most baddies cinsider good first date talk.
- I'd marry but I'm a bit weird (Lemmy user and all)
YES:
You're basically a centrist!
Both sides make some really good points.
Possible ice-breaker: "Have you noticed how nobody wants to work anymore?"
Possible ice-breaker: "Have you noticed we can't joke about anything anymore?"

If you've heard about the “pip boy” you’re gonna love the new Incel-erator 5000

I believe it’s a playbook that NFL quarterbacks wear, but I like the Pipboy idea way better

PACE YOURSELF! 5 beers/hour

Open bottle of tequila

You're not following the instructions!

you have to pregame at least enough to be able to talk to the girls and not just hide in a corner
- My talking to girls level is two drinks past pushing rope territory.
Tequila isn’t a beer, there were no rules stated about tequila, thus there are no rules against drinking tequila, it’s fair game.
It doesn't limit tequilas/hr
"Name: Michael" in case he isn't following instructions.

Bud, fuck that come get shitfaced with me and nerd about about the Titanic

I couldn't possibly spend a moment with a woman who couldn't talk with me about historical disasters.
I held to my values and wanted good things for myself and that's what I got.
- Ayup. Autistic abrasive af here, never made any attempt to change or hide who i am. Been happily married 20 years
Something something Rockerfeller
- Every time we launch a titanic a buncha rich cunts die.
  We need a fleet

pace yourself - 5 beers/hour

Man's going into the date at marathon pace

but unlimited tequila judging by the picture
- With only 5 beers per hour, he's obviously going to be thirsty.

Checks notes

Holy shit, are we still on Grey's Anatomy?

Is that show still going?
- it sure is! I proxy watch it by being in the same room as my wife!
This has got to be at least a few years out of date. Kanye is on the avoid list, and he’s not really relevant lately. And that income in the finance field isn’t going to impress gold diggers. FNAF is a bit dated at this point too, isn’t it?
- I kind of love that Kanye had that breakdown where he released the Heil Hitler track and went to twitter posting all caps shit saying he was a nazi, and the internet's collective reaction seems to have just kind of rolled their eyes and move on. Just pure apathy. It's not shocking or contreversial, more "Yeah, we all figured that out ages ago. Fuck off."
- FNAF has a new game and a collab with Dead by Daylight
- A new FNAF game released just a couple days ago, can you believe it?
- My college aged students are still pretty big on FNAF so probably not dated. Ye would be a terrible conversation starter by today's standards, though, even more so than whenever this was made, lol. "So, how to you feel about Nazi sympathisers?"

Hum, 75-100k for a finance something isn't a lot I think. I mean, I know this is a joke but that sounds wrong.

On a side note, I'd love to talk about with him about all the points under "topic to avoid"!

Depends on what in "finance" and where. Assuming not sales or trading the salaries come down quite a bit depending on job level.
- Also, probably a recent college grad and entry level.
- AND the workload goes up! The Financial Services industry sure is fun!
- That's why it's finance something
I see you also like to poke the bear lol. Seriously with me no topic is off limit I'll challenge every opinion someone has doesn't mean I disagree with it.
Also Boston Celtics are no? Because Boston is racist AF?
- Arguing for the sole purpose of arguing. Are you an engineer by any chance 😅
  I don't even know what kind of sport the Celtics are a team of. Doesn't mean I could not at least listen.

This made me Google Coleen Hoover to find out what she does and I still dont know what she does. Something to do with flowery pastel book covers.

I too sometimes forget my own name and work in something field.

I assumed this was a cheat sheet with the dating profile of someone they were meeting from online dating, but judging by the comments i misinterpreted. Why would someone need a cheat shret with their own name and not know what their own job is?

My interpretation is that they're bad at smalltalk and will forget basic facts about themselves. It would fit in with them needing a list of smalltalk topics to choose/avoid...
Because it's their catfish identity I guess.
"Finance something"
variable income
I know it's a joke, but he's lying to get laid.
5 beers a day

No politics unless feminist?

It’s a good rule for life. :)

Thats why you go for femboys! He is a bro with a hole!!!

everyone can be your bro with a hole, with the right attitude.
- I guess? But I am personally not gay

Yeah... those old hippies with their "be yourself" and "let it all hang out" - clearly the key to life is to wear a mask. Such enlighten. So fulfillment.

You can be yourself without a deluge of your own interests flooding the conversation. Unless being yourself of taking only about yourself and no listening. In that case mask on.

Are people touchy about Tornadoes?

Probably over overly enthusiastic which can be a bad thing in the Midwest during tornado season.
- Midwest here.
  a tornado once broke into my house and raped my cat. this is why when I see one of those sumbitches I shoot at it.
  the only good tornado is a dead tornado.
Not the "getting laid" vibe.

including the Titanic

B-b-but...

Oh, relax - your heart will go on.

Why do people care about incomes and jobs when they date? What do you care how much money i make, you ain’t getting any of it. My job is my way of making money and in no way reflects my personality in any way, so I don’t even like talking about work and capitalism on a date.

Many people don't want to date someone destitute or with poor financial prospects. That's just going to be hardship, and there are many other people that are probably just as good a fit without that problem.
Similarly, someone who makes way more money than you can add tension. They might be like "oh let's go out for dinner!" to someplace expensive, and you don't have the budget for it. Are they going to pay for it? Are they going to resent that? Are they going to pressure you into paying? Their expectations and standards may not align.
Also, if the relationship is going to be long term most people assume there will be some merging of finances.
Some jobs are also just gross. I wouldn't date someone who worked at Facebook. I wouldn't date someone who worked for Fox News. Your job 100% can reflect your values and personality.
- It’s sad that money trumps love and attraction now
Ideally in the future it will build into a partnership where it will matter.
Probably people who are looking to form a long term committed relationship where resources will be shared.
Some people wanna live good lives, there is no other way of saying this! Is it unabashed to openly have this in your list of criteria? It is
One of the very few, but strong reasons I don’t have long term relationships with woman! I would recommend for you to look up femboys OwO
- strong possibility they work in cybersecurity or IT too
- It’s fine for long term but I see it even in people who advertise they’re only looking for casual, and to be fair it only seems to be an issue if you’re a man. If a woman is a dog groomer making minimum wage, she’ll look down at a guy making slightly more. Tbf I’ve only dated women and not in a while, but I always found that society cares more about a man’s pay when it comes to dating

5 beers / hour

Yeah, not being a kid and knowing enough about Five Nights at Freddy's is a major red flag, good that he recognises that (but still bad that he even has to in the first place).