2mo ago

William Shatner says Mark Carney should offer to make the U.S. the 11th province

www.thestar.com /news/world/united-states/william-shatner-says-mark-carney-should-offer-to-make-the-u-s-the-11th-province/article_a9f7f3d7-2f2b-480f-af64-f78fe0573b6b.html

US already has 50 and adding another star is so much more a pain in the ass.

114 comments

I would settle for just the Province of California.
- Not without Washington, you won't. Cascadia Now!
  
  I read that like George Costanza.
  “CASCADIA NOW!!”
  
  As a New Yorker, please liberate us
- Hey Michigan is basically already Canadian, we can just blend in.
  
  Can confirm, lived in Michigan over a decade. Yoopers are more Canadian than most Canadians.
- Northeastern South Canada too!
- I think we should return governing authority to the natives the US stole the land from. Sorry native Americans, this dumpster fire is yours to fix now.
  
  There are few things more American than reducing a place to rubble and then being like: "Here. We're bored with this so you can have it back now. Aren't you so thankful that we liberated you from ~~your home, family, possessions, health, and everything you've ever known~~ the *bad guys?"
- We're working on that. Give it time. https://www.sos.ca.gov/administration/news-releases-and-advisories/2025-news-releases-and-advisories/Proposed-Initiative-Enters-Circulation-Requires-Future-Vote-on-Whether-California-Should-Become-Independent-Country
Alright you sons of bitches, I’m in.
Put it to a vote and I bet it would surprise you which states would leave the US right now.
- Pretty sure the entire west coast would bounce. Especially California, aka the 4th largest economy in the world.
  
  That'd be hilarious.
  
  Besides the geography problem, I've said the West coast and the northeast should become their own country.
  
  When the Balkinization of the US happens, the West Coast will be thr first to break off.
That's genius, But treat them as a territory, they don't get the be a province. But our current territories should be made provinces first, they deserve better representation especially with climate change making the areas more comfortable for living.
- you drive a hard bargain, we accept. You can even alter the deal and add more terms, but I warn you we will still accept. No take-backsies on the deal, we are Canadians now. Good luck, rest of USA, you bunch of effin losers. You're a real disappointment.
  
  Good luck, rest of USA, you bunch of effin losers
  hosers, you're Canadian now, ya gotta speak Canadian
California, Oregon, Hawaii and Washington consent to this agreement. Where do we sign?
- As an Oregon resident, I would be all for this. CA alone would be a pretty good chunk of federal taxes.
- Wellll... The western parts of Washington and Oregon. Out in the desert is another thing. Those guys are pretty well cooked
  
  Leave them. Let them have the years they voted for.
- Canada agrees.
  Then we can tax the shit out of anything from China crossing the territory to get to the remaining United States.
- Illinois volunteers as well
We don't want you. Split into 50 countries and we'll deal with the sane ones. We could make an American Union. But we won't merge
- Yeah, I don't want me either :/
- Can you take New England please?
Captain Kirk setting these Nazis straight.
Bill Shatner’s a badass.
- Shatner had a well earned reputation as an egotistical asshole for a long time, but he does seem to have become more reasonable in recent years
  
  Is he still a transphobe
  
  Mmm. Except for his extremely stupid grudge against RedLetterMedia when he misinterpreted good faith praise as insults on twitter and kept doubling down refusing to believe he could be wrong.
- How is he 94 years old while not even looking 70?
  
  In 2286 he did a slingshot maneuver around the sun to go back in time. Get with it, dog.
  
  For the other people who were also doubtful that the thumbnail was how he currently looks, yes he really looks like that right now at 94 years old.
  
  Money
I dunno. Let it fester as a territory for a while. Maybe Nunavut has languished long enough. Time to elevate the places we already have.
- it would have to be a territory.. or territories, even it's 50 of them. as territories only get 1 mp each. a 340+ million population province would get like 90% of the seats in parliament.
I’m sold, make it so.
- Engage?
  
  Aye captain!
  
  Allons-y!
Shatner pulls a "no u" after everyone already made that joke for weeks already.
- He's old, it takes him a minute to catch up
  
  He actually, started, the joke, before, everyone else, but, with all, the pauses, it took, longer, to finish, it.
- To boldly go where everyone else has been before.
- I don't know why people still pay attention to him
If Trump keeps being antagonistic, Carney should start calling him Premier Trump.
Canada doesn't want to be responsible for that dumpster fire.
- Too late my Canadian brother, HertzDentalBar let us in. I promise to learn to speak Canadian and the words to our "hey Canada" anthem.
  I've got to tell you, even joking about being Canadian take a huge weight off my shoulders. I didnt realize how much stress I was carrying around. Everyone try it, pretend Canada just made a deal to take your state over and you're now Canadian. Feels so good doesnt it.
  
  It's very kind to say such a thing, and flattering to hear it. I can only suggest that it's an even better feeling on an election day, and even the worst choice would be better than either of your neighbors options.
  And...I'm only saying this because the bar's......real low to clear guys. I've 100% confidence that you've far far better leaders among you than who's actually been running in the races.
  
  Well I did have to join a crazy anti monarchy militia but that's just for fun
- They couldn't handle our freedom, national debt, gun violence, or rednecks. We would suceed inside of a week and Ontario would say "huh, what? Ok, whatever. Sorhry." I know the capitol of Canada is Ottawa, but that is the level of concern and relief to the Canadian populous and Parlament. We are the crazy partner you fuck with but couldn't sustain a relationship with because of how degen we are, but you keep cumming back because we got that good good dollar dollar bill y'all.
  We would bankrupt the Canadian healthcare system within days.
  
  They couldn't handle our freedom
  What does that mean?
  Freedom of speech? People are being detained, arrested, and deported because they said things on their phones that are critical of the president.
  Freedom of religion? People are being forced by law to follow the rules of "Christianity".
  Freedom of association? Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion is being outlawed. Better not associate with minorities or "Libs" or you risk retribution.
  Freedom to Travel? If you think being freely traveled to El Salvador counts...
  Freedom of privacy? People are being harassed in bathrooms to "prove" their gender (how the hell do you do that?)
  Life? People are being denied necessary life saving medical treatment due to that lack of Freedom from Religion we talked about earlier.
  Liberty? People are being detained and deported without due process
  Persuit of Happiness? LGBTQ people having their protections stripped away and need to hide who they are.
  Other than the "freedom" to have people around you openly carrying deadly weaponry while shopping at a grocery store, what freedoms do Americans have that Canadians lack?
We wouldn't want to violate the prime directive though.
Who wants us?! Lmao. We are like the ugly chick with a nice ass and rich parents. Sure, some things are good, but not worth the attitude and no makeup versions.
- US firearm enthusiasts would be the biggest problem.
  
  I disagree. Most true enthusiasts treat their weapons with respect and follow the rules.
  Well, hm, maybe that's more anecdotal than I realize. Enthusiasts *that I've met or interacted with... But truly, while there are a lot of chucklefucks with guns, I imagine there are more that respect weapons and follow the rules.
  
  Not really. Unless they have an airforce hidden in their mothers basements.
.... and make Shatner the first Premier of the new province of Calitexasmassachussissippi
And his government title will be called Premier but everyone has to address him as Captain
- Calitexasmassachussissippi
  ...just call it Canadian Aztlan, to rub off the nationalists really bad. Done.
  
  Baja Canada
We don’t want them.
- Please... Just the edges
  
  Edging just got less sexy.
- I don't blame Canada. It would drop the collective IQ of the country.
  
  I mean, we’d trade you for Quebec - but you guys have enough trouble going on right now.
Mmmm... How about something else that doesn't allow Americans to vote? Because 11th province would just mean Canada becomes America under a different name.
- Not true, it would give us some election reform which allocates representatives based on the Representation Formula found in subsection 51(1) of the Constitution Act, 1867.
  No more 2 senators from California having the same as 2 from North Dakota!
I'm surprised they haven't done this already.
- We're afraid they might say yes.
  
  Yeah, that's a good point.
- Yeah, Fox News was touting a whole 12% of Alberta wanted to join the USA.
  Imagine their shock when many times that percentage of americans want the USA to join Canada.
Don't threaten us with a good time.
I accept.
They usually add states in pairs to balance the parties etc, so will Puerto Rico have to join also? Both of those places will most likely vote liberal.
- Puerto Rico leans conservative by a slight margin. Dems don't want them as a result and Republicans don't want them because they're brown.
  
  I think Puerto Rico voted 75% or something for Harris. They don't lean conservative.
Fully agree, where to start?
- first assasinate donald and vance
should be on tv while holding a check, like when Lorne Michaels made an offer to The Beatles
I saw the photo of old bill, the name and my mind jumped to "has died". Then I continued to the colony part and that made my day. Live long and prosper Bill!
yup, a flag with an American eagle shape cutout inside a Maple leave is much easier.
Please save us from neoliberalism.
I'm in!
No thanks..
Lol @ joke
Shatner is a transphobic piece of shit
No thanks, I don’t want Canadians who think they are American in my country
I certainly don’t want more of them
This joke gets funnier every time someone makes it
- Its funny because its so painful.
Florida here. Take us too and send the Nazis to Alabama.
- Shit man, don't ruin the deal!
- Ship them to Oklahoma and give every Native American a rifle

114 comments