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Lost_My_Mind @ Lost_My_Mind @lemmy.world
Posts
73
Comments
5,491
Joined
1 yr. ago

Please let it be that the FBI agent surveilling me was on break and he did not just see me get into a fight with the coat rack.

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  • Dude....why are you going around fighting coat racks? You bully!

    • Where to first, homey?

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  • I just want to pet him right behind the ears, and spend all day with him!!!

    • Does anybody else understand they need to make deep connections with people but their social battery has been dead for a while and can't put up with people's BS?

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  • Part of me is convinced this a joke for one guy, switching between two accounts, just laughing to himself. Like it's some kind of inside joke. And by "inside" I mean "inside his own head".

    • Does anybody else understand they need to make deep connections with people but their social battery has been dead for a while and can't put up with people's BS?

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  • kicks you in the balls

    Yes.

    Want to be friends, but then never talk? Like ever?

    • Do you like the centralized web of today?

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  • Myspace servers were wiped clean about 10 years ago. I checked about 3 years ago. My profile, and all my friends profiles were gone.

    It's a music service now.

    No clue about live journal. I never had one.

    • What was the first water level in a platformer?

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  • Oh yeah. Who can forget that water level classic, " deleted by creator ".

    • Mahmoud Khalil files $20m claim against Trump administration for false imprisonment

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  • Yeah, you can come over to our timeline. You just have to give one of us living in the other timeline ice cream and a blowjob.

    And since I'm the only one you know with the ability to timeline jump....

    zzzzziiiiippppp

    Chocolate chip cookie dough please! With butterscotch topping!

    • I dislike it when somebody says "so" and then pauses.

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  • Oh, that DOES sound annoying! The kind of thing someone should get....punched in the face REPEATEDLY for! So....ya know......

    casually walks away

    • What was the first water level in a platformer?

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  • Upvoted, but I'm not sure frogger counts. I haven't heard of the other two.

    • Non-Negotiable!

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  • "Outside? No thank you. I have warmth, and love, and HUMAN, ARE YOU MAKING MY FOOD YET??? Oh yes, and servants. I have everything I could ever want. They even clean my poop."

    • Non-Negotiable!

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  • "keep him, we realised a while ago we shouldn’t have gotten a pet in the first place”

    Usually when someone is a bad parent, I call for them to be spayed or neutered. But how can we prevent this dipshit from ever having another pet???

    I feel like that person shouldn't be allowed to have ANY pets. You don't just abandon animals in the street.

    There needs to be a list. If you abuse or abandon animals, Andre the giant shows up and eats you.

    I don't know the logistics of how it would work, especially since Andre the Giant has been dead since 1993, but I'M STILL WORKING ON IT!!!

    • Mahmoud Khalil files $20m claim against Trump administration for false imprisonment

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  • the body of....government responsible for this mess appologized, and gave Khalil 40 million dollars instead. Straight out of trumps personal wallet.

    Right? RIGHT???

    No. That doesn't sound like this timeline.

    Ooooooh, they murdered him. Ok. That fits this timeline much more realistically.

    See, in the other timeline everyone got ice cream and a blowjob.

    • Mahmoud Khalil files $20m claim against Trump administration for false imprisonment

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  • Coming out of my check I'm sure.

    • Bluesky is rolling out age verification in the UK

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  • If they did this here, I'd just stop using bluesky. I'm 41. But I have no interest in verifying ages online. We've all seen how poorly companies handle intetnal security.

    Just yesterday McDonalds had their entire database of applications compromised because someone tried the password 123456.

    Bluesky would be dropped instantly.

    • McDonald’s AI Hiring Bot Exposed Millions of Applicants’ Data to Hackers Who Tried the Password ‘123456’

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  • Are you sure you're a dancing bear? Are you related to the masturbating bear from Conan O Brian's late night show in the 90s?

    • Detained as an illegal immigrant – MAGA mom still has faith in Trump's mass deportation plan

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  • I do not understand life. My best guess is that none of this is real. The matrix is glitching. PLEASE HELP ME UNDERSTAND LIFE!!! I DON'T GET REALITY!!!

    • McDonald’s AI Hiring Bot Exposed Millions of Applicants’ Data to Hackers Who Tried the Password ‘123456’

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  • I've never seen any mcdonalds advertise or service 24/7 schedules. Not since the pandemic.

    Walmart and Target stopped too.

    Walgreens/CVS is the only thing I know that still does 24/7.

    • McDonald’s AI Hiring Bot Exposed Millions of Applicants’ Data to Hackers Who Tried the Password ‘123456’

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  • If the 90s taught me anything, it's that hacking is done exclusively on monochrome green monitors, with dos. Except once they hack in, the monitor is full color, and somehow has access to every video camera on the planet. With the ability to enhsnce resolution seemingly to magical levels where you can see a clear reflection in someones pupil.

    ENHANCE!!!

    • McDonald’s AI Hiring Bot Exposed Millions of Applicants’ Data to Hackers Who Tried the Password ‘123456’

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  • Many are 24/7.

    Lies detected.

    • McDonald’s AI Hiring Bot Exposed Millions of Applicants’ Data to Hackers Who Tried the Password ‘123456’

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  • What does their basketball skills have to do with this?

    /s