Lost_My_Mind @ Lost_My_Mind @lemmy.world

Posts

73

Comments

5,491

Joined

1 yr. ago

Their life is over unless they have all of their stuff!

I'm ok with these peoples lives ending.

Here's what we do. We all stop buying.

Stop buying what?

Yes.

Stop.

Line goes down until they stop.

My body is made of trees.

I can say that. I can offer no evidence. I can do no work to prove it. I can ignore how half the country knows I'm full of shit, and still have half the country believe my bullshit.

And if the situation changes, I can always move the goalposts.

Either way, I gain nothing by trying harder, and face no consequences either way.

What motivation do I have to even try to be more secret in my corruption?

Hell, why is sleep so hard for most humans?

raises hand

Literally in the top 1% of karma users in 2023. Banned in 2024 for.....

checks notes

........posting a comment that my bike was stolen when I was 7.

Reddit claims the ban was done by a human. However I just cannot see a human looking at the post I got banned for, and saying "This guy deserves to get banned".

My best theory, based on the timeline, is that they offered me a presale enter IPO offering before it went public. At the time I was on cancer treatment, and had $0 income, with my two sisters and mom paying for my apartment.

I had no ability to buy an IPO.

3 days after it went public, I still didn't own stock, and was banned. Because I said my bike was stolen 30+ years earlier.

Whoa whoa whoa whoa!

Cheeses? Meats? Sandwiches? AND a wife??? Buddy! Stop bragging! Next you'll tell me you own a home and have no debt!

......orally? Ew.

Fireworks sales are legal in Ohio. Setting them off is illegal.

However buying them and harvesting the gun powder seems pretty easy.

Eh, that depends. I feel like Boeing doesn't put much craftsmanship in. How hard could it possibly be to build a boeing quality aircraft? Some styrofoam and some duct tape, right?

I mean......I feel like that's enough, honestly. Jack Black voiced Bowser just because he can sing. Chris Pratt voiced Mario.....for reasons I still don't understand.

I was never a Charles Martinet fan, and Capt Lou Albano is dead. But at least Arin IS a voice actor. Shit, he could probably do what The Simpsons and Family Guy do, where one guy voices like half the characters.

He could do Mario, Toad, DK JR, and Sugar Bear. I know Sugar Bear isn't a Nintendo property, but fuck it, ya know? Have you seen him voicing Sugar Bear and Granny? I could legit watch a weekly 30 minute cheaply animated show where they keep having Sugar Bear steal Grannys cereal.

Although I do think he, and JackSepticeye, and Markiplier and Danny Sexbang all spread themselves a tad thin at times. Taking on too many projects at once.

I can't blame them though. Their lives look fun. Basically they wake up and get to ask themselves "Ok, what stupid shit do I want to do today?"

And then we get the 10 minute power hour, where they learn to do cirque del soil, or they order a bunch of kit kat flavors from amazon.

I'd be much fatter, but much happier if I was told "Your job today is to eat chocolate in the morning, and at 3pm you're going to talk in silly voices working for Nintendo.

Imagine living THAT life.

You think I'm AI? You realize I'm a mod at fuck_ai, right?

My butthole smells like fuck.

Good luck getting an AI to say THAT! Also, please hate the wealthy. Forget racism. Forget religious divides. Forget every other social divide there is......except fuck the wealthy, free Luigi, and fuck the police.

Blame Nintendo.

Back in the early 1980s fresh off the video game crash of 1983, Nintendo was on the verge of releasing the Famicom in Japan, and needed a way to market the console in America.

There was just one rule. In America, video games were dead. A fad. Disco was dead, and so were video games. So it wasn't a Famicom. It was a Nintendo Entertainment System.

In stores like Woolworths (think Walmart but not terrible) and Hills (think Target, but also a bit shady) they tried marketing the NES as an Entertainment system. It wasn't a video game. It was an appliance. Like a VCR. It was the only way to get stores to agree to stock the damn thing. No store wanted the risk of a video game.

Well, after a year of selling, and research Nintendo found kids were the main target of their product.

So they shifted away from the electronics section and into the toy isle. There was just one problem. Toy stores in America were divided. Some isles carried toys for boys, and the other half of the isles carried the toys for girls.

A bit of market research showed that interest in Nintendo shifted slightly more towards boys. 55%‐45%.

What happens next is the key to the PS2 ads.

Nintendo chose to carry the NES in the boys section of the toy isles. Which had an IMMEDIATE influence over not only the marketing in America, but also the direction developers took their games.

There was a clear shift towards the games AND the marketing being geared towards boys 5-13.

Nintendo then DOMINATED the video game landscape. Seriously. If your mom today is roughly 80 years old, theres a pretty good chance she calls all video games "Nintendos" (regardless of brand), the same way she calls all tissues "kleenex". Or if you're from the south (especially Georgia) all soft drinks "coke". Could be orange soda, it's a coke. Just like it's one of those Xbox 1080p Nintendos.

Well by the time of the PS2 days, that influence, even though Sony had nothing to do with it, had caked over. Video games were now very male centric, and the age range grew up with them.

In the late 80s, you were 5 years old playing super mario bros. In the mid 90s, you were 13 playing tomb raider and argueing with friends over the validity of a nude cheat code. And by 2001 you were 18 and horny, and....hey, look at these ads for the PS2. They're edgy!

And that is my TedTalk on why raunchy dreamcast ads, and raunchy PS2 ads goes all the way back to the atari 2600 game crashing the whole industry worldwide 20 years earlier.

That, and puberty.

Atari 2600

Tickle tickle!

Oh, thats ok. I can just live with you. I'll sleep in the master bedroom. And you can sleep....somewhere, I imagine.

You should change a coworkers map to say "New Muxico" instead of "New Mexico".

Just to see how long they take to notice.

Well, it IS hard to care about a multinternational sex ring that targets billionaires as clients including the current and some former presidents, when there's no pizza at the meeting.

No pizza = not important.

That's how these things works right? Bring donuts, kind of important. Bring pizza? Oh fuck! Shit just got real! Bring muffins? This meeting could have been an email.

Is housing shit because the homes need repair? Or are they shit because a single room shack is owned by corporate interests and costs 8 billion dollars a month?

Please tell me it's a sequal/spinoff to the Super Mario Bros movie.

And please tell me Arin Hanson voices the role of Donkey Kong JR.

Now, in case you're confused about which one DK JR is, there was a 1982 game called "Donkey Kong JR". It was a sequal to the 1981 game game "Donkey Kong". He also made an appearance in the SNES game "Mario Kart".

And then we never heard from him again.

The Donkey Kong in Donkey Kong Country is actually Donkey Kongs grandson. Which would make Cranky Kong the original DK....AND THUS THE COOLEST!!!

I just want Arin Hanson to guest cameo as DK JR.

I always think to myself.....

"Cats are weird, because cats are weird. But they all have different personalities. Yet you kind of understand what a cat will or won't do. A cat will never starve itself, because he just doesn't like the concept of food. It may eat less than another cat. I've had a fat cat, and a skinny cat. The skinny cat liked eating some food when it wakes up. Then it would save half the meal until later. Well what the fat cat would do is eat all of her half, and then wait for the skinny cat to walk away. Then she'd eat the skinny cats remains. We had to start locking up the skinny cats leftover food, and put the fat cat in the bathroom before we gave the skinny cat the other half.

Then one night the skinny cat wouldn't eat. At all. She was sick. She died that same night. It wasn't because she varied from other cats in her willingness to eat food. It was because she knew she was going to die.

But then you look at humans. Humans are weird, because WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SPECIES??? Some of them are 80lbs as adults, and you can count their ribs, and they refuse to eat because they think they're too fat.

Then there's others who are 700lbs, and eating whole turkeys by themselves, and afterwards claiming they're still hungry.

And thats just food. Humans are weird in every single way.

One time in 2006 I was waiting outside best buy for a Wii. It's 2am, negative 5 degrees outside, store doesn't open until 10am.

Guy in front of me had a tent, and an extension cord, and a tv, and a vcr, and a microwave. He had a tent apartment basically.

So this guy is watching Jurassic Park in his tent. I can't see it, but I can hear it. Ilove that movie. Favorite movie, and I can "see" it, just by hearing it.

He gets to the T-Rex paddock breakout scene. THE iconic scene of the whole franchise. An iconic scene in cinema all around.

He stops the movie there. He STOPS the movie!!! And instead plays Seinfeld episodes.

Humans are weird.