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The Assman
The Assman @ Assman @sh.itjust.works
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1,056
Joined
2 yr. ago

Get in line.

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  • If it means we get to meet Judy I'm down

    • Get in line.

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  • You can sue someone for literally anything, have you not seen Judge Judy?

    • What does your booger feel like rn?

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  • Pfft, I was already picking my nose

    • Stop this madness

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  • Also kroger

    • [OC] My dad collects watches, so I'm making him a giant one for fathers day.

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  • That's not going to fit

    • Being one with the natural world

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  • Have you tried asking the roaches why they're scurrying around your house on their disgusting little legs?

    • Justice for our boy

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  • Jeff Bridges

    • Mercury is totally throwing me off today

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  • if you're going to put your faith in a fantasy system and make actual life decisions around it, at least take the actual details of the fantasy seriously.

    All major religions have left the chat

    • Life just isn't fair

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  • People never mention gravity in these things.

    • you cant escape the long arm of the milo

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  • Is the name a reference to Milo & Otis? We had an orange Milo back in the 90s ❤️

    • Assist them

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  • Ur ugly, stay inside

    • US to send new $225 million military aid package to Ukraine, officials say

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  • The Pentagon has never passed an audit

    • Dog attack: 6-week-old Ezra Mansoor dies after Husky attacks sleeping newborn

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  • Yes

    • Are you ready to rock?

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  • Real life Tom Bombadil

    • The full video from the famous "Tank Man" photo

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  • Check your carbon monoxide detector

    • Why Mexico City’s thirst is causing it to sink: The demand for water in Mexico’s capital is draining its underground aquifers — and fueling some of the fastest subsidence rates in the world.

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  • And the city they built Mexico City on top of was in the middle of a damn lake

    • "Select a size" when it's just standard paper towel roll. Literally the same way it's always been.

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  • Oh sweet summer child

    No one has ever said that without sounding like an obnoxious dickhead

    • The Social Security Fix Nobody Wants to Talk About | A small tax increase would make the essential national retirement program secure for decades, our columnist says, but lawmakers would have to act

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  • Best we can do is nothing

    • The One True God

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  • If you cut off one of the Nic Cages two more Nic Cages appear

    • Biden Takes the Gloves Off to Tear Into ‘Convicted Felon’ Trump

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  • This is sounding kinda sexy