We could assassinate Trump sunbathing, Iranian official claims

This should be illegal. I think Iran has gone a step too far at this point. I don't think there is a single person alive who would condone this.

No one, I repeat NO ONE, wants to imagine Trump sunbathing.

I know, right? How am I going to get that image out of my head? It's almost enough to make me support censorship.
- Having Aphantasia can be a blessing at times.
Had me in the first half, not gonna lie...
Now, you don't have to:
Anger at Daily Show: they showed a picture of sunbathing pumpkin Lord for minutes. Much too long. Covered that part of the screen.
Damn you, Ronnie!
No worries. I don’t think he sunbathes in any capacity and any color he has is just sprayed locally from the ears out.
Dude, my mouth was open and everything!

Better to say that they could drone strike him anytime he's golfing. Then the Secret Service wouldn't let him golf, and his life would be ruined.

Y'all make it sound like he wouldn't ignore them like he does any other professional trying to do their job around him.
- Ignore, yes the cheetoh does. Putin? You just gave him a great idea for a staged "assassination attempt." You know, for that extra push at midterms.
- Valid.

First country to kill him gets a free WW3 trophy.

Or the Nobel Peace prize.
Either way, they’ll find a reason to make it happen.
- Most people can readily think of at least 6 or 27 or so.

Prove it.

If Iranian hackers were so elite, they would have done something cool like erased student loan debt. Instead, they're busy toppling Minecraft servers and trying to find anything they can use other than cell phones or pagers. Terribly un1337 of you, Ayatollah.

Bullshit, I don't believe this man sunbathes.

That’s what makes it so easy. Just pull a Mossad but with bronzer shipments.
Why you think Trump wants everything made in the USA at all costs?
- I maintain that the real reason he eats McDonald's is that he figures he can't be poisoned if he's hitting random McDonald's every meal.
But his face is always so tan?
- Is tan short for tangerine?

Nuh-uh, bet you can't.

Does he sunbathe? His "tan" orange glow is definitely a spray or cream as it's so uneven a d stops at his "hair line."
This also reminds me of a joke where Melania is getting interviewed by Playboy or some similar style magazine. The interviewer asked her if she bleachs her asshole?
Melania responds, "No, I just tell him to get a spray tan."
They're too chicken. Bwak bwaak bwak!

No. Please. Don't assassinate the worst leader in American history. Iran, think of the children. Please. Don't do it at your earliest convenience.

By Allah we'd be so owned we might all destroy the Great Satan then and there

I think their chances while golfing are higher.

Yeah I don't know why they think Trump would ever sunbathe. His orange hue doesn't come naturally.
I think they're referring to that as sunbathing.
And the poop stain is an easier target than his navel... duhh

There is probably an unspoken rule of geopolitics to the effect of "Don't start assassinating foreign dignitaries and heads of state unless you want everyone else to declare open season on you and yours." And it seems like we're getting closer to breaking that rule by the month.

At some point, he'll piss off enough people that the world at large will just look the other way when it happens.
- https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ken_McElroy
  McElroy was shot and killed in broad daylight as he sat with his wife Trena in his pickup truck on Skidmore's main street.[2] He was struck by bullets from at least two different firearms, in front of a crowd of people estimated as numbering between 30 and 46.[1] Despite the many witnesses, nobody came forward to say who shot him. To date, no one has been charged in connection with McElroy's death.
- At some point..? After that kid popped off at him in PA, all the offline people I know were just pretty universally either “shame he lived” or “meh”.
  You can only be a hateful and bigoted bully for so long before even the ‘apolitical normie’ can connect the dots between Cheeto’s stochastic terrorism, and someone turning that energy back his way.
- Maybe it can be a Murder on the Orient Express situation
- Yeah, they might have to get in line.
If all our leaders, kings, politicians all vanished at once, I wonder how long it would be before us normal people even noticed.
Except Trump already did it to Iran, and we were likely saved from all out war by fucking COVID.
Everyone forgets about Solomeini
The US has been regularly helping to assasinate Iranian foreigner dignitaries for years now, literally assasinsting many high ranking members of their government/military for years as well.
- Common misconception. It's perfectly fine to do it in that direction.
Doubtful we'll see a powerful head of state call for such an act. More likely, we'll see some lone wolf who gets tied to a nation that immediately disavows them.
- The lone wolf will be some domestic ex-maga mad that his VA benefits got cut. It will be interesting to watch the remaining group of clowns link Toothless Joe from rural Idaho to the Iranian regime. Maybe they can say he did it for hire.
I mean, if that rule gets tossed out, I can only think of like 2 world leaders I'd be sad to see go. Russia is already actively trying to kill one of those.

I would prefer it if they start with Thiel and the shadow cabinet first, then work their way towards the least competent member of the Project 2025 cabal. Fear would become Trump's shadow, and US officials would be more likely to handle Iranian affairs in good faith.

They would nuke (whoever they think is behind the assassinations) first. That's why nobody will do a thing. They are crazy enough to do it.
- Some part of me expects Trump to order Zohran to be nuked, if he is elected as mayor and resists federal misconduct.
- They wouldn't, the world has changed since the cold wars
That's probably the best way not to get your country nuked. If the US president gets assassinated by a drone and they can prove who did it, it won't be good for who did it.
- Realistically they probably won't know who did it but just pick someone they don't like.

lol, big talk. I'll believe it when I see it.

Unrelated, my favorite TV show is the X-Files.

That headline. First I thought Iranians sunbathe and play with drones at the same time? Then had the unfortunate mental image of Trump sunbathing.

someone call the coast guard, a baby whale got beached!

Exploding golf ball.

Please.

Ha, sunbathing! That fucking dungeon troll doesn't sunbathe, he sprays the tan directly on to his face.

Amateurs

It's a rub-on cream. You can see the finger marks by his ears and temples sometimes.
Maybe that's the threat, they've perfected targeted poisoning via spray tan mixture.

Let….. Him……. Cook!!

Why sunbathe when you can smear Orange shit all over your face and 'fool' people into thinking you aren't an undead ghoul- Donald Trump

Why would you try to make people picture that? Forget nukes, Iran has Level-4 Cognitohazards

Phhhht! Put up or shut up, Iran. No one thinks you'll do it. No one thinks you're a threat over here. You can't do it. You won't do it.

All talk. No action.

😇

Yeah. I dare you Iran. I double dog dare you! You'll never do it! Prove me wrong!
Please though. Please prove me wrong. I'm begging you.
Stochastic something something ;)
Fuckin IACO!!!

Prove it.

Betcha can’t!

Why would they tell everyone

I tell everyone if I don’t plan on doing it, but I want the heightened security to annoy my target.
"We know exactly where the so-called 'Supreme Leader' is hiding. He is an easy target, but is safe there — We are not going to take him out (kill!), at least not for now" - Donald Trump
I think the message is: killing me will be one of the last things you do in life.

I don't believe that for a second. I'm gonna need proof.

Of the sunbathing? Even if it was true, I don’t want to see proof of that!
- No, that they could do it. I don't believe them. I need them to prove it. Somehow.

Thats ridiculous. Its so imporbable that if they did it would be definite proof that allah is the one true god and I totally know that aint so just like them. So they can't do it.

I thought allah was the same god christians worship
- They are the same, yes.

Don't threaten us with a good time, fellas.

I triple dog dare you!

there 3 kinds of people...

those that say things. those that do things, and an incredibly small population of people who do what they say.

youre not #3, iran.

Wish they were #3 in this instance.
- so does most of the planet.
  /sigh

I wouldn’t even bat an eye. You do you, boo.

Do it, you fucking cowards!

Don't threaten us with a good time

I'm into it.

Inshallah

Joke's on you... I'm into that shit!

Well done it. Liberate the people

Oh no. Anyway

Don’t tempt me with a good time

I'd play that hitman elusive target mission.

Such a tragedy that Trump doesn't sunbathe though.

What a horrible thing to say!

If you reveal what your plan is it's less likely to succeed.

No balls.

I'm pretty sure that's spray tan. Looks like Iran's intelligence isn't very good.

I’m more disturbed by now having to imagine Trump’s navel. How many belly folds is it under? Is it an innie or an outie? Lint content? 🤮

- Bruh.

I mean come on and do it, what do you have to lose at this point. You clinging to the hope that maybe the US and Isreal might chose not to go to war with you?

as if he'd ever sun bathe

"We ~~could~~ should assassinate Trump sunbathing, Iranian official claims" ftfy

Guys, I hate to be the disagreeable one here but counterpoint…maybe they mean while THEY are sunbathing, like it would be easy peasy

So, um, when?

Obvious lie as Trump uses tanning beds and makeup

$40m isn't worth much if the only places you could spend it are not nice

It sure would be a shame if some idiot told the SEC to stop regulating crypto.

Can talk the talk, but let's see you walk the walk.

Really anyone can, since the SS let a teenager take a shot on him...

Sunpainting

Blah.

I wonder if he secretly does sun tan or use a tanning bed and this is Iran letting Trump know that he’s not safe.