4mo ago

How many Phalanx CIWS can we bolt onto a C-130 before it legally becomes a Zumwalt-class destroyer with wings?

(asking for a friend with very specific budget constraints)

20 comments

I think a few under the wings is a smart idea.
- Better make it two under each wing so they don't get lonely :3
  
  Like two boobs under each arm
- Backup engines.
The CWIS on my first cutter refused to run until it received a blood sacrifice (someone accidentally cutting their hand while repairing it.)
- Anoint the CIWS in WD-40 and the blood of the unworthy, and the Machine Spirit shall awaken
  
  “Blood of the unworthy” is a funny way of saying non-rate blood. Which is what it took every time.
- Better a cut hand than a civilian airliner.
I don't know, but there's only one way to find out.
I thought the Zumwalt was one of the only ships the Navy didn’t mount an R2-D2 on:
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phalanx_CIWS
The U.S. Navy deploys it on every class of surface combat ship, except the Zumwalt-class destroyer and San Antonio-class amphibious transport dock.[5]
- If that's true, then what's that over there behind you?
- Rail guns were supposed to be the brrrrt but now it's hypersonic missiles?
  Totally a missed opportunity for ultrasonics, if you ask me.
  Zumwalts are the special little children of the fleet, unfortunately. The hypersonic missiles are probably going to get put on hold for phasers or disruptors or something. Each of the crew is issued a bat'leth, so that is cool.
  
  Totally a missed opportunity for ultrasonics, if you ask me.
  So we can clean their hull from beyond visual range?
If Ukraine had one, they'd already have put it on a drone.
Exterminate!
How many you got?
Does his budget perhaps allow for the Goalkeeper CIWS instead? Less bulky and far better looking!
Just minimize the beehive use, please, we need those to pollinate the crops.

20 comments