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Posts
23
Comments
453
Joined
2 yr. ago

  • My bf and I went to see Dethklok and DragonForce. We both went to the restroom at the same time.

    I walked right the women’s room, went and then joked around with the other women about how we walked right in I left the restroom pushed my way through crowds, saw my partner was still standing in line, went to the bar, got drinks, then hung out until he was done.

    IT WAS SO WEIRD AND AWESOME.

    Also the concert was awesome.

  • That appears to be a man. I mean to say women play sports with women. Trans women are women.

    Edit: I may not be making myself clear. When I say trans women, I mean a person who was a man at birth and now identifies as a woman.

    Maybe I have the terminology wrong?

  • Terry Crews was sexually assaulted by the head of a Hollywood talent agency while at a party in 2016.

    Initially, he was embarrassed and angry. He didn’t want to talk about it, but after talking to his wife and seeing what the Weinstein accusers were doing, he decided to speak up about it. Seems that he wanted men to know to know it can happen to them too and to not be afraid to speak up.

    I think it’s really important for other men (and other genders) to see that. Maybe more people will be brave enough to speak out too.

  • Yeah that’s the point I was trying to make but it’s clear to me now, I was sounding anti-trans women in sports.

    I was saying there are contexts when cis women perform better than trans women and vice versa. Depends on so many things like the sport and the people involved that you can’t just outright ban trans people from sports.

    Also, there are so few trans people in sports that they aren’t able to get quality studies done. If there are that few people, why are conservatives spending time trying to harm the trans community? Just leave them alone. They are humans too.

  • No that’s not what I meant. To be clear, I support trans women playing sports with cisgender women.

    I want to be accurate and honest when speaking about it or our side is just as slimy and shady as the other side’s argument.

  • First of all, the Washington Examiner is a right-wing news outlet. They have a bias in there reporting and it shows.

    Second, the number of sexual assaults on campus is likely significantly higher according to more recent information.

    https://www.apa.org/monitor/2022/04/news-campus-sexual-assault

    Last, if someone assaults a person who doesn’t believe they were assaulted, does that count?

    Ever had sex while less than stone cold sober (keep in mind the entirety of the surveyed considered to arrive at this figure were college students)? Survey says you were raped. Doesn't matter if you were just tipsy, doesn't matter if you and your partner were equally drunk, doesn't matter whether you think you were raped/assaulted, nope, we decided you were.

    What is that person had passed out drunk and doesn’t remember it? Is it rape now? What if that person has a learning disability or communication disability? Do you think that’s rape?

    My point here is that something can be true if the person isn’t aware of it. I presume people are also more likely to say they’ve received unwanted physical interactions than to say they were raped.

    You know, society used to think you couldn’t rape your wife either.

  • No, I’m saying we should just allow them to play sports because they’re human just like us.

    I’m just saying there is basically no data and there are certain sports where cis women have an advantage of trans women, just as there are sports where it’s the opposite.

    I think it’s important to make decisions with factual data and be honest up front. If I tell someone studies show I’m right and then you later find out that I was only talking about one random study with 1 woman, they’re less likely to believe me, if if what I said was valid.

  • You’re absolutely right about sexual assault against men. I thought what Terry Crews did was heroic. Even when he didn’t want to speak out, he knew he needed to be a leader and he spoke up.

    I didn’t leave it out from a lack of concern. I was just making a point by how unsafe women feel in every aspect of their lives, not just occasionally in a Reddit forum.

    Trans people, especially black trans people, are targeted in at a whole other level and are often ignored in reporting. They don’t deserve that.

    Crazy that we all can’t just respect each others right to live.

  • I agree with most of your post. And also, I want to be clear that I support trans people participating in sports.

    The problem with studies is that there is literally no data. This is such a statistically insignificant problem there isn’t enough data to go on. There were like 20 trans athletes in total for one of the larger studies.

    The data we do have shows mixed results. Trans women tend to perform better in sports that require physical strength, such as weightlifting.

    They do not perform better than cis women in cardio events such as running and swimming. Their smaller muscle mass can’t keep up with the larger frame.

    Regardless, I think the value that comes from participating in sports is too important to not let them play.

    A lot of the bans of trans kids in sports seem to be happening at the age where sports are co-ed so the whole thing is fucking stupid. Just let people play sports.

    EDIT: Me: “I’m trying to say I support the trans community and want them in sports.”

    Everyone else: “why do you hate trans people?”

    Like are we so angry at the world that we instinctively yell at people agreeing with us?

  • I know a lot of guys in the comments are saying they don’t see it so they don’t have the opportunity to call it out. And some of those guys are making good points! These communities probably don’t interact much with men that treat women with respect.

    But I also wonder how much of that stuff happens and they don’t realize it’s harmful to women. Obviously sharing photos isn’t okay so that’s an easy one to call out.

    It’s not a man’s fault that he doesn’t see it, necessarily. You don’t have the same experiences as women and it just doesn’t occur to you as often. Women are on alert 24/7.

    Kinda like that thing about the number of guys who feel safe walking to their car at night vs the number of women. (I know some men are anxious in that scenario too, but nearly ALL women are.)

    When I was an elementary school aged kid, I was afraid to play outside at my grandmas house because a man drove by yelling cat calls. This actually happened a couple times growing up.

    At 14, a random man followed me home from school.

    In my college there was a flyer in the restroom about how something like 1 in 6 women will experience sexual assault or rape. But really that’s just the number reported.

    Every single woman I know has experienced sexual assault or rape of some kind. (I didn’t ask my coworkers to be fair).

    That’s bonkers.

    But I do appreciate those of you that are trying to be better! The comments here are reassuring and give hope for the future!

  • Wyandot Barbeque.

    Yes that is spelled correctly. They didn’t even spell Wyandotte or Barbecue correctly.

    Don’t get me wrong. Love a hole-in-the-wall bbq place that’s secretly great. That place ain’t it.

    It seems to me the people who love it went as a kid. I guess it’s nostalgia?