What was the worst hotel you ever stayed at?
schmorp @ schmorpel @slrpnk.net Posts 8Comments 293Joined 2 yr. ago
schmorp @ schmorpel @slrpnk.net
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2 yr. ago
“I have watched them all day and they are the same men that we are. I believe that I could walk up to the mill and knock on the door and I would be welcome except that they have orders to challenge all travelers and ask to see their papers. It is only orders that come between us. Those men are not fascists. I call them so, but they are not. They are poor men as we are. They should never be fighting against us and I do not like to think of the killing.”
“I hope I am not for the killing, Anselmo was thinking. I think that after the war there will have to be some great penance done for the killing. If we no longer have religion after the war then I think there must be some form of civic penance organized that all may be cleansed from the killing or else we will never have a true and human basis for living. The killing is necessary, I know, but still the doing of it is very bad for a man and I think that, after all this is over and we have won the war, there must be a penance of some kind for the cleansing of us all.”
The question reminded me of "For whom the bell tolls". It's rather strange that during all these months whenever I get bored and grab a book it's about one of the various wars of last century. I can't help but read all of them with an eerie feeling of anticipation. Remarque's "The Night of Lisbon" hit especially hard, but this one is a tower of a book as well and I had totally forgotten how deep it is. If Hemingway was alive today, would he get involved in some conflict elsewhere? Should more of us be on the way to Gaza, or at least involved in a general strike to force them to stop this nonsensical warmongering? Even not being in the US settling into business as usual makes me feel like a fascist, every day the feeling gets a little stronger. Non-violent protest would be my weapon of choice and always has been, but if I'm ever forced into hiding for who I am? Might just get really creative out of pure spite.
Some kids will test your boundaries. They don't mean to upset you, they just want to be sure the rules are the rules. Just stay firm, keep repeating. I had to put the 2yo kid of a friend in 'timeout' (put in another room and briefly close the door, explaining why) because he was testing out my boundaries by throwing my stuff on the floor. This can get worse when they are tired, to the point where they want everything and nothing till they pass out - this particular toddler stood next to my bed, complaining about everything (especially the lack of mother's milk!), not wanting to enter while I was just repeating my invitation to join me. In the end he fell asleep standing. No problem, I then lifted him onto the bed where he took his nap.
I think a lot of us still grew up in situations that were escalated into some kind of conflict by the grown ups around us, and we somehow carry the idea that when our kid doesn't show the desired behavior we have to become louder, more threatening, come up with punishment ... It's not what I see working well in real life. As a grown up your job is to be the rock, the source of calm, the unbothered person, the voice of reason (I know, it's so hard!). And repeat, repeat, repeat. The toddler will not understand immediately that throwing stuff is a bad idea, so you tell them, and tell them again, and again ... but always keeping your cool. In a couple of years they will have grown out of being a gremlin, you know that and they don't. The toddler phase is intense, seems to last forever, but is actually very short! I find it useful to explain everything in words even to very small children. They understand more words than they are able to say. Letting them know why they can't have or do something shows respect and consideration and can avoid a screaming match.
Putting a toddler in bed and let them wake up with someone else is not an easy situation for them, it was probably a bit of a no-win. I know I'd freak out waking up in a strange house without my usual person!
Oh wait that's an ADHD symptom? I'm considering going nomadic atm maybe that makes it bearable.
I'm a woman in her forties and maybe my perspective helps. What I've noticed about myself as I am approaching menopause is this: I won't tolerate stuff that I don't want. No compromise anymore. My body just won't allow that I be in a place I don't want to be in, with people I don't want to be with, in conditions I don't control ... so I'm probably not a very nice person anymore in the way I used to be - but at same time feeling powerfully aligned with what I really want for myself, and walking out of situations that don't serve me.
As women are still raised to please and support others many of us tend to wear ourselves out in caring for other people and their opinion, and when that falls away with menopause the results can be very painful for the person themselves and their families. This change in me killed my relationship, and I do feel very sorry how it all went down, but I was literally physically unable to stay and remain in this 'wife' situation that I tend to almost automatically create for myself when with a partner.
And for your situation as a partner: No, you never have to put up with your partner criticizing you all day and dumping their rotten mood onto you. That's not acceptable for any reason.
Wall-E, is that you?
Why should the homeless have no right to organize? It's funny that the only places with (rough but efficient) functioning self-organization I could find so far were among the homeless and the small folk. Those with stuff left to protect are too much up their own arse to want to play well with others.
Also, the plans to get off the street are real, most of the time. Every kindness you show is a seed that one day will point towards the right direction.
I've been hanging out with the homeless as a kid, and lived on the streets for a few months as a young adult, travelling and panhandling. I met many very kind, and often very damaged people. They are on the streets because it's for a variety of reasons the only option they can manage, not because they enjoy scamming you out of a few coins and do nothing all day.
If you are concerned about your money look at the suit wearing people, most of it ends up with them.
Improve your local community in other ways. Or give in other ways. Not sure what would apply in your local community - I live in rural Western Europe and that's very different from what you describe. People here set up donation boxes, swap shops, create food banks, organize markets, create safe spaces for minority groups, community gardens ... mostly volunteering time. Not sure you are in the position to do this? Sorry things are so heartbreaking. I hope we all figure this out soon.
How did you like Georgia? I keep beong obsessed by it (because music).
How did you address your trauma? What methods did you find worked?
Thispunk.
trying to catch trains, trying to find the correct room at university ...
Naughty mushrooms doing theirs again, they are so good. I got remembered I never was the uninspired believer in a mechanical world I had become, and turned back to animist knower - a lot of what you write resonates very much with me! Congrats to getting out of the rat race, faraway friend. Cautious as well with the little prankstershrooms. Remember grounding inbetween flights. So many people are getting out - once we get together we will be unstoppable!
I would take diagnosis around Neurodiversity with a grain of salt. I suspect both conditions might be the same brain differences presenting differently, and I don't think science has really gotten to the ground of this yet.
Society is collapsing as we speak and my best case scenario is this one because I do whatever i can to create a soft landing spot for me and my local community.
Yes, and also closeness changes with time. It has been like this in my family. I've felt more close to one or the other of my parents over the years depending on what I was doing but I don't remember having a problem with it. That said, my parents made sure to treat us both equally as kids, and if they felt closer to one of us they didn't let it show.
Do your friends have a website? I'm always curious to find good ideas to steal for other communities!
Haha insane, I swear this popped into my head out of nowhere yesterday.
Well not entirely nowhere, but I work with plant dyes. So far I've only dyed wool, but I suddenly had the idea to create some T-shirt printing process with what grows around here. A dye bath and ink are rather different things though, so I'd be curious for ideas how to turn plant pigment into ink, or where to look?
I've never even seen normal silkscreen printing done, but vaguely understand the idea. I'd try different fabrics stapled to a wooden frame as sieve, and maybe use wax to cover the non-print areas?
For a non natural method - could 3D printing be interesting for making sieves?
And what is an emulsion?
It's a technological and a physical issue. We just can't store every bit of information plus a picture of everyone's cat. We can't guarantee that no information ever gets lost. We've also not really stored and archived every shopping list, advertising, pamphlet, silly poem, ugly drawing etc. since the time of the printing press and that's okay.
It might be a good idea to store and archive some written material as time passes but we want to be a bit picky about what we store. That said, I wouldn't mind to find more shopping lists and less posh documents in museums.
Yeah, just like most material that was ever printed or carved into a clay tablet. It's the way of things.
We didn't want to spend much money in Porto city and wanted more privacy than in a hostel. The "window" (didn't have glass, just a metal grid) was on boardwalk height, perfect for drunkards to pee into the room from outside. We repaired the bed to the best of our abilities when it fell apart during the night. The "bathroom" was probably the most luxurious feature: a corner of the room, separated by a curtain. It kind of matched the rest of the city.