Speaking as someone who's Christian fundamentalist parents did not ensure a proper education about this, whose community enforced it, it takes time to figure out, even with the Internet. I was sexually active years before I ever orgasmed, and even after that, the shame for enjoying sex at all was still engrained. I was aware of my anatomy, but with limited, supervised access to the Internet until 18, it set me up to be metaphorically fucked in my ability to communicate about it. But hey, I'm in my 30s and survived.
The replication is actually evidence to me of moral reasoning. There are limits to the types of experiments we can or should be willing to perform. Power posing was never considered an entire scientific model like the sex/gender distinction.
Being mentally unstable isn't a character flaw. We should be encouraging everyone to get help. A good therapist knows what a delusion looks like, what the criteria are, and how to develop a relationship with the client to gently challenge them.
I did a little deep dive on them recently when I realized I was talking to a narcissist with grandiose delusions claiming experts in sociology and such "made up" the gender/sex distinction and, whaddya know, he thinks narcissism is a made-up disorder, too. He's been around our discord server for months and I finally popped off and posted the criteria along with how his multitude of claims fit. He understandable got pissed, but at least everyone else is aware what the criteria is now and how to walk through it themselves. (And to be clear, I only weaponized the term against him because he referred to people using neutral pronouns - such as myself, as he is well aware - delusional).
If you hold a belief with absolute conviction that has been falsified, shown counter evidence, and it impacts your functioning in society, then you may have a delusional belief. It's not uncommon or a big deal once you can recognize it and work out the logic.
We really just need to be teaching psych in high schools, honestly. Destigmatize it. Ik I'm stigmatizing narcissism a bit here, so lemme add that being a narcissist doesn't mean a person will act as abusively (if at all) as the individual I've been dealing with is, nor does abuse imply a mental disorder. It gets nuanced but I think it's fascinating
Soft sciences in general need to be covered more in the fields OP mentioned! Psych and philosophy should be taught in high school, too. The amount of arrogant asshole STEM majors I've met that think experts in sociology and psychology are just making shit up is too damn high. Ironically I did a deep dive on delusions recently and it's wild realizing that's what some of these folks are suffering from.
To be clear - delusions are not a character flaw. We all probably have had a few in our lifetime. The fucks I'm thinking of just push their delusions onto others and become emotionally abusive by weaponizing the term against people for shit like preferring neutral pronouns. They don't bother to ask why someone (like me) might have the preference.
I just don't understand the projection. Trump is the one that didn't ensure peaceful transition. The first in history. Trump is the one that staged an attempted coup.
I went on a deep dive researching delusions, though, and I suppose calling people out in the throes of one isn't usually fruitful.
I have some fingers crossed Missouri will flip scumbag coward traitor Josh Hawley. I'm worried folks might be too apathetic but Lord knows we've got a better candidate for the Dems this time than a billionaire Bud Light heiress
Hey, I'm sorry it's taken me so long to respond but you had nothing to apologize for! I appreciated the conversation and had some confusion, but that's why I originally commented to get clarification:) I enjoyed the chat, though, and hope you're doing well!
Oh gotcha, I totally agree it's not a big part at all! Honestly, I didn't experience an orgasm until well after I became sexually active, and very rarely with a partner since. It's extremely important to me as I'm back "on the market" now and have really struggled in past relationships with it. I enjoy the whole aspect to it, exploring whole bodies, but I would very much like to find a relationship where my partner prioritizes helping me climax and has some patience with me on it.
By chance, did you talk with your gyno about vaginismus? Not sure if I'm spelling that right, but I've had a few friends mention that it's painful, one friend saying she couldn't wear tampons or anything. I could see why orgasming first would help the muscles to relax
My understanding is 80% of people with a uterus don't climax from penetration, not that we find it necessarily unenjoyable (which is true for me, too; I do need clitoral stimulation to climax). I've taken courses on women's studies, feminist philosophy, etc. to overcome the problematic religious attitudes my parents had, too - and lots of therapy! I'll see if my library has that book available, though. I'm always interested in learning more.
I'm really sorry you had that experience growing up, though, that's awful. As normal as our experiences felt to us having privacy invaded and all the shame, that much shouldn't be normalized! I'm glad you've found what works for you, and I wish you all the most pleasurable experiences around it throughout the rest of your life 💝
Well, not that I think it has to be your experience by any means, that's part of the beauty of life - we're all a bit different and into different things. I do quite enjoy penetration without need for lube (I mean, I do need to have natural lube, obviously). I usually get myself there with just hands and might use a dildo when I'm worked up enough. Vibrators are great, no doubt. I don't typically use toys, though, honestly. I did more in my teens when I was ignorant to how my body worked lol. Which is why I wrote the OG comment...I didn't have appropriate toys, and it caused some shame on occasion. I knew it felt good but didn't feel safe talking to my parents about it.
Uhh. Hi, woman here...RIP my inbox but I think it's important parents talk to teenagers of all genders about this and consider having them look for toys they can experiment with if they express interest. Just because we don't orgasm from penetration doesn't mean it feels bad lol. Better they have toys available so they're less likely to use something inappropriate.
Right, Hitler killing himself was where we fucked up. If we just hadn't been so chicken shit and had handled him ourselves, his ideas wouldn't be around anymore! /S
Speaking as someone who's Christian fundamentalist parents did not ensure a proper education about this, whose community enforced it, it takes time to figure out, even with the Internet. I was sexually active years before I ever orgasmed, and even after that, the shame for enjoying sex at all was still engrained. I was aware of my anatomy, but with limited, supervised access to the Internet until 18, it set me up to be metaphorically fucked in my ability to communicate about it. But hey, I'm in my 30s and survived.