ijedi1234 @ ijedi1234 @sh.itjust.works

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4 mo. ago

They're paid in how many teeth they can pull out with rusty pliers. Compensation isn't always in hard cash, you know.

That would be the Prosperity Gospel, the one true Gospel penned by the LORD himself, and etched into our very minds! God's approval is directly tied to your wealth - it is entirely possible for you to pay your way into Heaven! And that's not even getting into the Earthly pleasures of being one of God's favored!

Do not fear, pilgrim. I shall enlighten you on the ways of our LORD.

You see, the LORD knows that his agents require compensation for their holy work. Therefore, God proactively created children to serve his most worthy agents, and thus, serve the LORD! It would be an honor to be chosen for such a holy task.

The Republicans understand Epstein's holy mission, and wish to see it upheld. Such is why Epstein was smited by the hand of God when he turned his back on God's light. No treason shall be tolerated in the eyes of the LORD.

It is the Devil who wants such children freed from their duty. To distract such children from their holy task exudes the grave sin of sloth. We must stand firm against such demonic influence if God's Plan is to succeed.

Please be aware that I am roleplaying as a evangelical whackjob in this comment. Sometimes obviously fake comments are taken as truth.

Joffrey also had some decently smart people helping him. The lad would've gotten his throat slit long ago if Tywin wasn't around.

I want to see Trump drink from that cup on live TV.

It's from 二分之一 aka "1/2 White or Black" aka "Black and White".

It can be found here: https://store.steampowered.com/app/1998450/Black__White/

If you can get past the...aesthetics, I believe you'll find the setting to be pretty neat.

I think it's good, though it's the first part of a series. The other parts haven't come out yet.

I've had lots of encounters with those Christian crazies. They tried to convert me twice.

We are presently on course for the 二分之一 timeline.

In that one, some aliens arrive in the 2030s. They noticed our cruelty and debauchery, and informed us that our extinction will come at our own hands if we continue. The elites of the world laugh this off, and lock the aliens up on some island so their autotroph nature can be studied instead.

Fast forward to the 2060s. COVID has returned, killing more people than ever before. This is on top of the ongoing nuclear civil war in the US, and nuclear devastation elsewhere. With most of the elites dead or hiding in a bunker, many of the people who survived asked the aliens for help. The aliens agreed.

This resulted in a conflict between our present world and a world that appears to be a mix between Fahrenheit 451 and Brave New World, supported by the alien followers. The aliens are genuinely, fully willing to give you free healthcare, a long life (people supporting the aliens can live for 200 years), and a life free of worry or suffering (an alien will replace most of your organs when you join, allowing the alien to handle many of your basic needs, like food). The only thing the alien faction asks for in exchange is tossing out human culture - your favorite books, movies, games, etc are all gone, replaced by materials accepted by the aliens.

The alien faction ultimately won by the turn of the 22nd century. The surviving elites tried their hardest to get rid of them, but failed. Instead, the aliens continued to rule the human race unopposed until the close of the 27th century.

But of course! The reporter dared to question the will of God. You see, God saw that wickedness had infiltrated the land of Texas, so he commanded the waves to rise, and strike this stronghold of debauchery! A functional warning system would interfere with God's Plan for those people. But the wise men running our nation decided to wait until God's Holy Work was completed, so as to not incur God's mighty wrath upon themselves! Praise to our most benevolent and merciful LORD!

And yes, this is evangelical roleplay. Sometimes I do it too well.

Oh, that's very simple. God is how you can apply "Just Following Orders" to absolutely everything. And he's benevolent because you can always claim he'll support you, considering he happens to be unable to be reliably contacted.

Some chance is better than none. If a dude was pointing a gun at me, fully intending to blow my head off, I'd fight him with my bare fists if I had to.

Oh, and adrenaline is a powerful thing. Eye and throat are excellent targets in a fight to the death, and any weapon you can get your hands on is allowed.

My proposal is "legal cause to slit the dad's throat in self-defense".

MAGA God needs blood to feel satisfied.

God has no tolerance for traitors. You see, God discovered that they supported the Devil in secret, so he sent a flood to kill them. It's a message to help the surviving Texans remember their true allegiance.

Gather round, my pilgrims. The mighty LORD came to her in a vision, and informed her that God sent the hurricane to destroy the wicked, like Sodom and Gomorrah. And so, the LORD ordered her to withhold rescue until God's Punishment has fully swept through the land, purging evildoers wherever they hide from the LORD's holy light. Only the faithful will be spared by the LORD. Hallelujah!

Oh uh, and I'm joking with this comment. Sometimes my roleplay is too good for some folks.

Oh that's easy. Trump claims that many more would have died if it wasn't for his "wise" leadership. It doesn't matter how many die; he can always claim that more would be dead.

Absolutely. The US has made major advancements in how to inflict pain. In fact, if you're someone who gets certain urges about deconstructing people, you will now find it even easier to let those urges out by joining one of our law enforcement institutions.

America is a paradise for individuals who want to hurt people, and hear their screams. It isn't as good for everyone else.

Because every job that doesn't pay minimum wage requires a college degree. So the universities know that you need to pay up if you're looking to stay off the streets in your 20s.