This is undiagnosed mental illness. Please get a mental health assessment (any hospital can probably do it, just call around).
It gets better. When I did this I was diagnosed with PTSD and anxiety. They put me on meds that immediately solved 50% of my worst symptoms. Overnight.
It was magical and my life has only continued to improve ever since
This is a, currently undiagnosed, mental illness. I would go get a voluntary mental health assessment (most hospitals will do this) and find out what it is. None of us here are qualified to diagnose you.
I did this once and found out I had PTSD and anxiety. They put me on meds that literally fixed my most annoying symptoms overnight. It was magical. And I've been so much happier since
Or you could use Plex and jump through zero of these hoops