SharkEatingBreakfast @ SharkEatingBreakfast @sopuli.xyz

Posts

20

Comments

855

Joined

2 yr. ago

Ohhhh this is why my posts finally came out of the negatives.

Thank you!

There are some issues & experiences that women go through that men will just simply never "get", and that's fine. But invalidating the answers & experiences from women is why I believe there are no longer many women participating in conversations on Lemmy anymore.

I mean.. looking at all this, why would they want to?

Is it controversial to say that I'd rather converse with a bear? Or do you suppose folks get upset about it?

Maybe, just maybe, folks who do not understand it should listen to what women have to say about it? But many are thinking about it completely removed from the contextual experiences of women. It's.. awful.

Lorelei, you are so special and good! 💖

He was an exotic shorthair tabby who was given to a shelter because he didn't look f×cked up enough. He was adopted but the owner got a younger, more playful cat, so they put him on Craigslist where I found him.

His shelter name was "Luigi", but when I saw him, I immediately changed it to "Waluigi". It fit him so perfectly.

He snorted when he got excited and looked angry all the time, despite being the friendliest gremlin you'd ever meet. He loved all creatures of different species and nothing frightened him. He made me laugh every single day.

He stayed away completely from people-food, with two notable exceptions: ranch dressing and Taco Bell. I still don't fully trust either, tbh.

I loved him so much. Still miss him every single day. Not sure I'll ever find such a wonderful cat ever again.

They seem to be a normal Lemmy user.

Sick burn! 😎🔥

Oh, that's true!

It'd be fun to hear the names, but I understand if people don't say or use a different name.

"Yeah but if I don't think about it, it's not a problem!"

How come?

I've been single for about 7 years myself & struggle with the same thing.

Would you say that you're confident in yourself or not so much?

Do you have close friends that you're able to spend time with?

You sound like you're in a lovely relationship!

Yes, relationships are compromise. Your goals will change. But it may be for the better or worse, depending on your partner.

What kind of compromises would you consider healthy vs. unhealthy in a partnership?

What makes you hate people?

How much time have you spent being single?

Not long enough.

Did you have a bad experience with a relationship recently or something of that nature?

People don't have to give extremely detailed answers (or any answers) about their experience if they don't want to.

I'm just curious about people's thoughts about being single, how they view it, along with if being in a relationship lived up to their expectations compared to being single.

I'm a believer in human connections and sharing experiences. Curiosity drives my need for answers and different points of view.

My orientation also makes it difficult to parse answers based my own point of view, so I posted to get answers from folks who more than likely have had a much different experience.

Why what?

Context: Some woman on the internet said she would feel safer spending a night in the woods with a random bear rather than with a random man

Some woman

Not "some woman" — quite a few women. Lots of women.

"Girls desire a knight in shining armor to come sweep them off their feet!" — my pastor

For the longest time, I struggled because I was told all my life what a "woman's purpose" was, and my desires never lined up with that. Felt like a freak because I never desired romance, sex, or partnership with a man (or anyone else, for that matter). If that was my purpose, was I supposed to will myself to want that for myself? Was I doomed to be alone forever? Was I wrong to want to pursue adventure and things that I wanted?

If my desire ≠ God's desire (which was apparently union with a man at some point in the future), then my desires were.. wrong. Maybe/probably even evil.

So I fucked up my life trying to follow that and fit into that mold. I did things I never wanted to do because it was the "right thing" to do in the eyes of God.

After I escaped, I never really recovered. But.. I discovered a lot about myself.

I did bearded dragon rescues & fostering, I got into cosplay, learned how to sew stuffed animals, got some mental health care, rekindled my love for nature.. all by myself. I learned to love me and not base my worth on what other folks believe I should do or how I should behave. I don't have a partner who gets to dictate my personality. I got to grow on my own.

I'm still coming to terms with.. a lot of things about myself, but now I'm able to grow freely instead of being confined to such a small pot.

Don't let people define who or what you are, or what your purpose is in life. Only you get to do that. It's both terrifying and freeing, but you can do this.

"I never said that!"

TwoXChromosome is also dead. Witchy-type instances are abandoned, too. It's so sad, because I've had the most lively and supportive conversations in those places.

There is a grave problem with the Lemmy ecosystem system if women do not feel safe / comfortable using it.

Most of the female-centric Lemmy communities are now abandoned. I'm sure the hostility did not help that. Don't blame them. I'd never suggest Lemmy as a space for women.