Boomer Humor Doomergod @ Semi_Hemi_Demigod @lemmy.world

I'm just this guy, you know? Except on Lemmy.

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1 yr. ago

Fun fact I learned recently: The band The Presidents of the United States of America did a collab with Sir Mix-A-Lot under the name Subset

Even if I felt lonely, none of those things are how I would start talking to anyone.

When I'm in public I wish to be left alone. It would be a violation of the Golden Rule for me to start talking to randos about their outfits or the weather.

Or go to a bar and say hi to people who are hanging around. Compliment someone’s jacket. Tell someone that their whole aesthetic is cool as fuck. Comment on the weather. Become a part of your local environment and interact with your fellow humans. Join a hiking or hobby group.

Nah, I'm good thanks

Yeah. The small town I used to live in had trolley service to the nearest city about 20 miles away before they tore it up for a highway.

I solve this problem by rarely leaving my home.

But it’s also become less necessary as we have much improved telecommunications. I regularly work with people halfway around the world from my house.

Imagine how much pressure that jet pilot was under. The guy who literally invented flying is your passenger

more necessary

I haven’t had a commute in over a decade

It’s just the future sucks

Satsuma

That’s not terrorism. That song is a bop.

It’s the national anthem of the Internet.

If I wanted to hypothetically perform a terrorist attack I’d bring an explosive device into a TSA security checkpoint line on a busy travel day.

Hypothetically.

It can do bread and the best tasting broccoli and Brussels sprouts you’ve ever had

Nah, I’ve got a Bluetooth thermometer so I can track it while I play video games

Not scaling could be a feature and not a bug. It would raise the price of beef and thus lower demand.

And not good ones like Australian cunts

I have a Traeger and saved $200 because it was the model without WiFi.

I made a delicious turkey breast on Independence Day

I just post while I’m waiting for a command to finish running.

It’s not my fault the deploy takes 20 minutes.

The idea that we have to grow food for food is ridiculous. Cows turn grass into meat just fine, why do we need to grow corn and soybeans for them

I bet it’s because, like with hogs, we’ve bred them to be so growth optimized they can’t get enough calories from grass anymore.

These aren’t too different from the novels we’d get at the Scholastic Book Fair. Captain Underpants definitely comes to mind.

They gave my kids a stepping stone from short children’s books to chapter books so it’s not all bad.

Cervical vertebrae security