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155
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2 yr. ago

  • How many bottle caps have you got stashed away?

  • See, this is the thing about being smart. You're intelligent enough to realise that there's a lot of shit you don't know.

    When you're thick you just believe any old bollocks you read...

  • Rubber bullets are supposed to be fired at the ground and bounce up into targets...

  • But even their good games are the same games over and over...

  • Yes, but we use Stones to measure body weight.

  • To sum it up America is a third world country with a fake Gucci belt. It has been that way for a while.

    Fixed that for you.

  • You're assuming those kids aren't going to starve to death.

  • If anyone asks me how I'm doing my bog standard response is "Fucking terrible but apart from that I'm OK."

  • Yeah. I'm amazed at how many people do not know how to swim.

  • Yeah, I've been an xnbox user since 360 but I don't think I'll stick with another console.

    I've been looking at handheld PC`s....

  • Permanently Deleted

    Jump
  • I have a phone. They have a phone. I have their number. They have my number...

    If they don't have my number there's a reason.

  • The Daily Heil...

    Just look at that font.

  • Fuck off!

    It was just a few years ago at most...

    /s just in case. In 1989 I was 17...

    Just a few years ago...

  • Remember that old song, the one that goes *The world's been burning since the world's been turning" and then gives a ton of examples?

    What do you mean "old"...

    ... well shit. I'm old.

  • Also, the level of civility and intellect in the comments is relatively high.

    Fuck you! No it isn't you moron.

  • My body is also a temple.

    Admittedly it's like the temple of Athena... really old and falling apart but it's still a temple.

  • That or I did it in my sleep.

    Yeah, why am I OK when I go to bed but one of my legs is fucked up when I wake up?

  • Dad Jokes @lemmy.world

    Does anyone know anything about repairing hinges?