Madzielle @ Madzielle @lemmy.dbzer0.com

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11 mo. ago

It would be a baby bonus. If we had free healthcare and subsidized daycare then it would be a bonus. But we don't have those things, so it's an insult

I resent your comment, "I'm no girl so I couldn't karma-bait using my pu$$y" This could have been said much differently. Im a girl, and back when I needed reddit karma to post in a sub I wanted to partake in, I just posted my baked goods on the baking sub. Not all women are like, I'll just use my pussy, I'd argue most arnt like that. Give me a break yo. Why you gotta punch down on me because you need karma? Just post ur dick, oh im sorry your d!ck.

I was until a few years ago, a machine operator in plastic extrusion. All but one of our engineers were useless. Did they do work? Sure. Was it productive to the line? Occasionally..

We paid $20,000 for a new mil thickness tester, made by young engineers at the local university.

They held a whole "class" to show us how it worked, presented not by the ones who built it, but by our engineers.

It failed during presentation. So we all learned how to measure manually instead. It never worked. They ended up installing the old one back, which hardly worked.

Then for the next year it sat broken, and unless the old thickness tester was in a good mood, we had to do it manually, which was so utterly time consuming and difficult.

While I think engineers are important- so many just fuck around, least where I worked.

I don't know what you're talking about. "Their peers are going to laugh at them"? "Unfair"?

These are your excuses to not teach accountability? Not only are you wrong in that these are not my child's viewpoints or reality, you sound pretty young yourself. All of his peers need to worry about being a responsible adults, regardless of future incomes.

I don't care what the other children are doing, I only care what my child is doing.

Would you jump off a bridge (to your death) if all your friends were? Thats fair right? Lol

Thanks for the laugh

I find it peculiar we never heard about ms-13 until a few months ago (at most).

My loud, fun, not perfectly fit ass never had trouble finding dates in my youth, and now my loud, (but polite) not perfectly fit ass, found a perfectly fantastic husband, who've cherished eachother nearly a decade.

Lies old man, lies

I don't know psyop, but a cultural norm to say "when your 18 you're out".

From the age of 12 on, not only did my parent say this habitually, they also stopped parenting completely.

It was a common theme of rejection in my house. I could have been the perfect kid, and tried, but I'd still here "you're gone when your 18". Never mind I didn't even graduate Highschool until I had been 18 for a few months- it was habitual rejection all through my teens, and to me, sounded like, I'm done parenting you and I don't want you in my life past the years the government madates I take care of you.

Shit hurts. My husband's parents weren't like that, some of my friends were, some of my friends weren't. You can tell who's doing better now, and it's not the kids who were told they were out at 18.

If you don't intend to help your young adult children through their early start, especially today when it's so hard, don't bother having children.

To add, I got kidnapped once by a mentally ill "friend" off their meds when I was 20 years old. At 6:00 in the morning I was able to make it to my mother's door. When I knocked, she said I needed to deal with the consequences of my actions, And she didn't want to deal with this. So I had to get back into this person's car. My mother rejected me and my plea for help. I had just asked to stay at her house until the first bus ran to go home because I was in trouble. She said no and slammed the door in my face. I got back in the car, and a few hours later, I had no idea where we were. The man stopped stopping at stop signs because I kept trying to jump out. He locked me in the car. Eventually I was able to escape, and the police were called, and I couldn't call my mother for help. I will never do that to my children. Her consequences for her actions now are 15 years now of no contact.

These would be the "pick me's" whether they realize it or not

Women who are raised by misogynists but can't see past it. Women who have insecurities and can't see past it. They are latching on to the same order for security cuz it's all they know. Just a guess

I opened a new YouTube account and watched some videogame videos. Rust if you're curious. I'm a woman and this game is played by mostly men. At some point my husband was struggling with his mental health, we were in gridlock so I tried to look up male perspective mental health videos to see if i could understand him better or reach him in a new way.

Those two searches alone, unlocked a flood of bullshit into my feed. I couldnt believe the garbage I was bombarded with.

It is akin to how women are pummeled with beauty ads and standards (buy this to be pretty!) since we are young.

They figured out how to market this same insecurity to men. Wild stuff

Edit: except they aren't just selling "self care" like they do to us, they're selling hate-

Its so absurd.

I went to a rural title one highschool. I took general level classes and had honors/high honors at least half of my semesters.

Half way through my senior year, I moved. It sucked balls. My new school, was small, literally the smallest school in my state. Graduation class size was 54 students. It was outside the Capital city, and affluent. Everyone was a "prep" had money, some drove very fancy cars to school ect.

The new school didnt offer Gen level classes, only college and AP. I was upset at that because those classes were known to me to be super difficult at my old rural school. At that time I just wanted to smoke pot with my friends tbh. But .. I took the classes.

Y'all. This little rich prep school's College course classes were easier than my Title one school Gen Ed. I couldn't believe it. This was 2006, and I know now, they did that to keep the funding going. All the little rich kids had parents who could afford to send them all to college, and they needed to look good for thier hard-to-get-into universities.

It still frustrates me the world is like this.

I am, not great at parenting, I've made hella mistakes. I've only one son and do my best.

The number of teachers/therapists (my son works a few programs for his needs) that have been floored by my willingness to parent and hold my son accountable for his actions, is far too high.

While I'll take the compliment being "a breath of fresh air" (an actual compliment from a therapist) it bothers me more parents cant take thier own faults to accountability nor hold their children to any standard of conduct really saddens me. I shouldn't be a wildflower in a field of dirt, it should be a field of flowers damn. A silly metaphor but you get my point hopefully.

With the "no child left behind" act, it's really turned into pass every kid no matter what.

Everyone talks about reading, did y'all know for a number of years schools stopped teaching phonics and instesd introduced sight words? Aside from many parents handing over an ipad instead of reading to their young children- the schools dropped phonics for the last 5 years or more in place of "sight words". I believe they've seen the damage and have gone back to phonics now, but there is a whole generational cohort who got fucked now.

Im glad I read to my son. Im glad I never gave him Internet access outaide of supervised educational time, or watching cat videos together. My son, who is in special education for learning disabilities, is one of the best readers in his class, and this year(6th grade) started in with Gen Ed and is excelling there too!

Reading is so good for children. As a toddler and beyond it is easy to bake into bedtime routines. Bedtime took 30-60mins, and we created so many memories for both of us. I'll always remember the silly voice I used to read the Dogmans' "haw-haw-ha-ha" laugh. Close familial bonds keep these kids from feeling alone and turning to social media for support.

I don't know much more than you, but they said it right in the comment. "They are obsessed with their value" Such as, "High value man" "low value man" ect

I do know my 14 year old nephew is obsessed with making money in ways I never saw in my youth cohort

And I hear you, and may even agree, I was just sharing this guys Pov

I get it, but this is where he comes from, I thought the same thing you did until I read this.

Hell yeah

The solution is not moving country. God if it were that easy.

I want to add, the fist time i binge ate, i was 8 years old. My guardian had a snack draw, full of all the 90s kid corn syrup you could want. We were to pack two for our lunches each day. My guardian was a severe misogynist, and even at 8, i was angry all the fat boys in media were clowns and funny and liked, and the fat girls were basically conveyed as trolls.

I remember hearing "growing boys need to eat", and at 8(edit maybe i was 10), i thought, im growing too, why cant i eat? And i ate up that snack draw. It was my first protest to "girls should only eat things they look cute eating".

I like to think if i had a proper mother maybe that wouldnt have happened. But the mother i had, i saw once a month and didnt eat ant veggies, was thin, but meat and potatoes is all she ever ate, water tasted bad to her and she only drank coffee. She was never a big part of my life. But my misogynist guardian was, and thus began my disorder. "Mayo puts hair on your chest; women are weak and stupid, i dont date fat women" ect I would hear and it would piss me off. I got fat, and i was the "daughter" he didnt rape. It protected me, in a way, but ive a mouth and i wish he would have tried, i could have gotten us kids out sooner.

As a teen hed throw fast food at me and call me names while i was confined to my room, not even allowed out by the end, to use the bathroom.

I have c-ptsd, and now at 37 still fucking stuggle with it. I just wish i could live somewhere walkable, and i miss my 20s when i did live in a place like that.

I did.

I was big growing up because my guardian literally kept me in my room, threw McDonald's at me and called me a fat bitch. I was allowed to go to school, and go to my room from age 12-16. When he was arrested i lost 60 pounds, gained it back though. Then when i was 21 i lost 80 pounds in 11 months, i worked hard, rode my bike to work.

Then, I got pregnant at 25. Gained for that- but lost it all fast with nursing and maintained healthy weight until the pandemic. I liked hiking, and riding my bike to work, and ate whole foods, i had, had fast food a whole 3 times since i was 21. .. until i was 32. My male coworkers ate bk for lunch every day, they were thin, our work was hard (i lifted and packed approx 2000-3000 pounds of material we made a shift), so i started getting Bk too. And i got fat.

The pandemic hit and my now husband got the unemployment, so he ordered restaurant food nearly 5x a week. I left my job to support my kid. I peaked my weight again.

Now, at 37 years old, with a special needs child, no walkability in my neighborhood, and no car (we have one car and he works a lot) to drive to the trails.. my son at seven, stopped liking hiking anyway, i find myself stuck in my house. (The last time i took him he literally just layed down in the beginning of the trail and refused to move, its kind of funny now). This also was when hubs was ordering hella food, id get a salad or whatever but fries are just, a god. Anyway

I live a pretty isolated life. I signed up $40/month for a gym with a pool and was swimming last year, but when i only have a one hour window (with the car) to go a day, and the pool schedule being what it was, i stopped going. Excuse? Sure, but i always found it easist to lose weight and exercise when it was baked into my life, and not like, going to the gym, i dont want people to see the fat girl run, even when i was 21 i would run my neighborhood at night so people couldnt see me. But i liked the pool, i just cant get there without a car, which i dont have. My bike is broken, i sont onow how to fix it, and cant afford to, and like i said, you come out my little neighborhood, its immediately highway. I walked with ny son up there one day to try and go somewhere, and someone took a right on red, when we had the crosswalk, and nearly hit us. All you could hear was cars, and smell exhaust- truly aweful pedestrian experience.

Im back on whole foods, but its not really what i eat now, its seditary lifestyle. "So get out there!" One might say, i have highways on two sides of me, and an airport on the other, and a swamp on the otherside. My favorite local grocer is .6 miles from me measured directly through the swamp to the strip mall, you have to take a highway to get there. It's so frustrating, i would walk. I really would. I struggle to work out on my own, my husband is tall and thin, and hates working out, so im on my own. Thats the hard part. Im keep eating my veggies and whole foods and continue to work on it, since i turned 32 my goal is to get fit again by 40.

My husband got a sword and i was messing around with it, and realized my arms have gotten weak, so just this week i started doing push ups. Or even just trying to hold myself up in that planking position. I work on my binge eating disorder with my therapist because, being alone in the house, with no friends to invite me anywhere, just readig the Internet some mornings, is enough to say, "I don't care I'm making nachos for breakfast, it doesnt make dishes, i dont feel like cleaning the god damn cutting board and doing dishes. I do em all by hand, and when you cook from scratch, dishes are.. plentiful.

Anyway, i know its the best thing. I remember when i could run without getting winded, the energy i had, I refuse elevators and take the stairs at my therapist office, and i get mad im winded when i reach the top. Got tree work to do this week, idk. It's not that im lazy, my binge really is just fucking nachos, and about six months ago, i decided, even if im binge nachos, i make a portion half what i used to, and double the jalapenos.

Youre preaching to the choir on this.

I support mens health.

Ive a million stories of hurt men who didnt deal or heal well with their hurt, and ended up hurting others (and themselves) for it. Usually its some tragic thing that happened when they were young and never dealt with it, because culturally men have been told to shove it down and man up for decades at least. But, I've been told many a tragedy from male family members, friends and ex lovers. And then watched them go from victim to abuser, or some other consequence, and its sad

Men should be taught, and allowed to express themselves. Its literally okay to cry, its a process of emotion.

Support fellow humans