Perhaps more involved than you'd like, but you can get a "beer can cutter" which will allow you to eliminate the noise by removing the entire lid. Basically a fancy can opener.
There's a significant difference between claiming some things was spontaneous and actually getting consent. This guy wasn't in a relationship with the player where this type of behavior would have been previously cleared. He's not even claiming that he asked permission. In this case you would have to assume mutual spontaneous consent. That is what he's claiming. However, one party has clearly said it wasn't mutual consent. So now you either have to assume the victim is lying or you take the logical path and realize that there's photographic evidence of a powerful figure, who doesn't claim to have asked for consent, assaulting a female athlete and showing no regard or remorse for that behavior.
I see a chipmunk, I upvote. In other news, these cute little dudes love to jump up into the underside of vehicles. Had one jump up on the skid plates of my truck. He screeched at me when I popped the hood and used a stalk of grass to chase him out.
It does come in a bottle. Had an amoxicillin reaction. That bottle was a lifesaver every four hours of the day, or night. But I also think this is BS. Benadryl will plug you up like nothing else.
I can't speak for him. But, as someone who has had a dog as a family member, that dog may have made the psychological difference. Whole, "If not for me, then for this dog that is counting on me."
Cute murder floof.