LeylaaLovee @ LeylaaLovee @lemmy.blahaj.zone

Posts

20

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239

Joined

2 yr. ago

Glad you're receiving it well. I don't like being a buzzkill, but I just think the Asperger's name is too problematic within neurodivergent communities not to be mentioned anytime it's brought up. Because it really isn't just some slur, it sows division within the autistic community and keeps people with the "less annoying" autism from getting the help they need.

I'll be honest, I was initially diagnosed with Aspergers and didn't truly grow out of the mentality until I graduated from high school. It wasn't until I learned the root of it that I really reflected on the damage it caused both other people and myself. I was mean to the people who I fit in with more when I was in high school because I prioritized being part of the main social ladder so much, and it was a really big mistake.

As upset as I am with myself over it, I also understand that this used to be a greater structural issue that started whenever people were diagnosed. I was a kid and grew out of it by the time I was an adult, so I can't judge myself too harshly. But I can stand loudly against the conditions that made me side with neurotypical people who abused me over neurodivergent people who didn't hate themselves as much as I did.

This, I make this point to another commenter in this thread because it's really important. Pitting autistic people against each other at diagnosis is awful.

It's ableist because it was used to reinforce the idea of autism that's good and autism that's bad. It was a quiet endorsement of the eugenics that Dr. Asperger and the Nazis supported. Using a different category of disability specifically to call them lesser is ableist. It's not just the name, but the separate categorization that pits autistic people against each other at diagnosis.

I know what you mean, I loved the joke in middle school. But once I learned what Dr. Asperger was actually guilty of, I just felt so weird using his name

Asperger's is pretty ableist, albeit not popularly known as ableist. It was pretty much the term for the autism that Nazis saw as a superior subgroup of people, from the name of a Nazi doctor. While being autistic could get you killed by the Nazis, being diagnosed with Asperger's would have been a good thing. It's essentially saying that you have good autism and not bad autism.

Not saying anything bad about the meme because most people don't know the origin of the term and who doesn't love the ass burger thing. But I'm never gonna see the use of a Nazi doctor's name for this sort of thing as normal and will educate people at any opportunity. It would be like saying conjoined twins have Mengele syndrome. Yeah he started a bunch of research on conjoined twins, but he usually just brutally murdered them.

Ada was handling everything really well. But yeah, Hexbear used to be Chapo, they had to make the migration to Lemmy because they were really bad about accidentally brigading shit and got banned from Reddit for it. Ada (and also me) gave them a bigger pass than they deserve instance wide.

196: "Fuck NFTs! They're the same figures with random features"

196's favorite piece of media:

I'm more just explaining what things look like because (just like that chaser thread) this is a giant lightning rod of drama. I'm just very hurt that the 196 mod team would be okay using language that degrades my child like calling someone braindead for standing against ableism. You can't be pissy with me for calling out disappointing behavior, I don't see all your edits and comments at any given time. You changed things, I didn't know that. The defed thread needs to be the end of this conversation on the instance as a whole.

ChapoTrapHouse is a podcast. They used to have a subreddit until they were banned from Reddit. Not because they were leftists like they claim, but because they just loved starting shit with other communities. It wasn't intentional, it was just a big community and mods made dumbass posts without thinking about it and all of a sudden threads were Chapo threads. They did the Reddit migration years before we did. I was around for when Hexbear was on Reddit, these are literally the things that got Chapo banned from Reddit and lead to the creation of Hexbear, Lemmygrad, and Lemmy.ml. We can't bash them for their brigading while commiting the exact sins they commit that make them so difficult to federate with

Posting a blacked out screenshot and saying "Ada made me do it" is just weird. You didn't even leave a description. All we see is that you got a DM and there are a bunch of scribbles over it, this is a nothing burger. It being pinned to the top of the community is weird. If you had posted the actual screenshot and made an actual point to what they said and didn't use slurs that insult my child, I'd feel a tad different. But as it stands, this really feels like drama seeking behavior. There is no argument being made, it's just directing people towards Hexbear.

This is the kind of thing that Chapo got banned from Reddit over, the exact event that created Hexbear. If you don't like Hexbear, that's fine. They are generally drama starters, I don't support defederation but I understand why it's being talked about. But you can't call their users slurs, provide no context to what they said, and expect anybody in what is a safe space to be okay with it. It is literally the same thing that makes us discuss defederation with Hexbear, except they don't use slurs.

Insane has always been an ableist term, albeit depending on the context. Insane Asylums have horrible optics for a reason. It's like how retarded used to be proper medical terminology, but because of popular adaption of those terms as derogatory terms, you're not gonna hear a doctor say "yeah your son or retarded" is "you are insane". They're only used as insults now

Well I'm not saying leaving someone for preferences is bad. It happens. But to enter into a relationship knowing that your preferences wouldn't work with your partner, that's shitty.

I already made my account over there. I was on Chapo when it got banned from Reddit and just never made the jump over back then, but federation really does make all the difference.

I'd describe it by explaining that it's unhealthy to have a partner that doesn't like who you want to be. A pre-op trans man is a man. Treating them like a woman during sex would likely make them feel dysphoric. Having a partner that they know wouldn't be attracted to them if they actually transitioned would just suck. If you identify as a straight man, it would be invalidating of the trans man's identity to fuck them anyways because you see them as a hot woman.

On the "chubby chaser" bit, think of it like this. I love fat girls, tummy soft 🥺 however, my girlfriend could lose weight if she wanted to. If she would feel more confident with 100 less pounds, that's okay because it's her body and I want her to be happy with her own appearance. If I got with a fat girl who wanted to lose weight and I made her feel bad about it because "then you won't be hot anymore" that would be kinda shitty right?

Yeah, saying this right now, 196's main mod consistently posts bait. Ada is a great admin and community runner, I feel bad that I have to consistently see her step in because Moss fucks up so much obvious and easy shit. Moss posting a blurred picture of her conversations with Hexbear admins and blaming the blurring on Ada is shitty, posting ableist slurs and using them in mod messages to people calling you out is shitty.

These are actions that cause a lot of drama within the community, and take less than a few seconds of thought to know they're bad ideas. Moss consistently wants a drama filled community and it sucks. It's like the second one of these ridiculous bait post become old news, OH SHIT HERE'S A NEW ONE FOR EVERYBODY TO SALIVATE OVER!!!!

Ah that makes sense. Like I said, I don't watch him so I didn't know about the slurs. Yeah he's pretty much the only mainstream streamer who actually understands being a leftist.

Oh boy, more of Moss starting shit. This is literally bait that doesn't actually communicate anything, along with communicating something you never actually said. Moss, quit with the shitty bait posts and ableist slurs, you are a drama starter in your own community and it isn't appreciated. Malicious compliance towards Ada is a dick move.

Hasan just sucks for far different reasons. Vaush is actively aggressive towards leftist people of color. Maybe I just haven't seen enough cause I don't watch react streamers, but Hasan just seems a bit out of touch because of his money. As far as streamers go, I think he receives far more hate than is warranted.

My kiddo is autistic and non-verbal. I am enraged over this. And I bet it was on 196 too. I'm done with Moss' shit, she cannot moderate in a safe space because she only cares about it being her safe space, not the community's. I've seen so much casual bigotry pop up in these anti-hexbear threads and it's really eye opening. So much dehumanization and gatekeeping of the queer experience. I'm officially done with 196. This was already my backup instance, I've just been waiting for FMHY to start back up.

Ada is a really fucking cool admin, she is a great community runner. But 196's mod team is consistently a single tier above 4chan trolls.

Vaush is so fucking bad. Dude explicitly defends his use of slurs on stream. Why can Vaush call people the n word? Slurs have no place in a leftist space. My child is non-verbal, this mod is using the language people insult my child. The comments left by OP were calm and reasonable. The mod didn't even try to argue it in public because they know there isn't a good response to "don't use slurs".