Kindajustlikewhat @ Kindajustlikewhat @beehaw.org

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2

Comments

15

Joined

2 yr. ago

Between this and Northwestern, I'm so glad student journalism is getting a spotlight!

I would love to eat meat replacements on a more regular basis, but impossible and beyond burgers are more expensive than actual meat where I live. So I just don't buy them. If the technology /economies of scale actually manage to make them cheaper than meat, I'd replace 80% of my meat consumption.

Saying this as an ethnically Chinese person who is not being racist... I had a eufy robovac and when I discovered it was Chinese-owned and had a video camera installed on it... I immediately got rid of that thing. I don't trust any technology company owned by China to be able to see into my home.

When I'm really struggling it's annoying to have people call me strong or resilient. I mean technically I am strong but it feels like a curse. I don't want to be strong. I want it to be easier.

The worst one, though, THE WORST, is when they say "I don't know how you do it/live like this."

Uuuuhhhh, if I had a choice I wouldn't. I wouldn't do it. I have no choice. The only way out is through.

Thank you! I am tough. The last 3 years have been harder than I could've ever fathomed, but I'm still trucking on. There's a lot more to me than depression, even though it swallows everything sometimes.

I literally fantasize about having enough space in my home for a chest freezer.

This week is the first week I've felt halfway close to being a human being in a really long time. My rTMS treatment for depression is finally starting to kick in. This is my 3rd round now and each time I see significant improvements, but they only last 4ish months and I relapse horrifically after.

My most recent relapse lasted 3ish months while I was scrambling to get treatment (and an unsuccessful Ketamine trial). I finally found a hospital willing to treat me, and also give me maintenance treatments so hopefully I don't relapse again.

It's just been hell for a while. Last weekend I finally felt the gears in my brain "click". I am capable of experiencing positive emotions again. I still feel emotionally dead a lot of the time, but at least I don't want to die anymore (for now).

It feels good to not be in excruciating pain. It feels good to have less disordered thinking. I look back and it feels like I was a different person, I don't even understand or recognize that person.

Anyways, I'm just... Trying to take a breather. Trying to fully experience the moment. I don't know how things will go in the long term, but I know the next couple of months will continue to be livable. Trying to be grateful for that, and not think too much about what comes next.

Agreed, in my opinion asking for safe spaces is not entitlement. It's people who feel most comfortable (safe) with the status quo, who think others are entitled for also wanting to feel safe.

Now I have depression so it's slightly different than a physical disability, but I have been on disability for 2 years and some days am completely debilitated.

The biggest thing that helps me is just meeting myself where I am, and accepting and working with my restrictions rather than fighting them. One example is I try to make meals for my boyfriend and I since I'm not working right now. But for the last couple of months I've been extra sick and so groceries go bad in the fridge, I eat nothing or trash or order in which is super expensive.

And finally I decided to stop forcing myself to cook only to fail, and now I buy tons of preprepared foods and meal replacement powders. It's not as healthy as home cooked, but it's better than McDonald's or chips, and I don't spend as much money ordering delivery.

I'd tell me in high school to get treatment for depression instead of white knuckling my way through life and ending up with treatment resistant depression at 28 because I went without for so long.

The most refreshing thing here has been to be able to respond and be backed up in my response.

Personally the most demoralizing thing about having the conversation taken over is often not being able to respond/take it back. At first I was afraid to say that this is just one more example of white people main character syndrome, because I was like, ugh, I'm going to get a bunch of comments of how I'm the actual racist one for generalizing all white people.

The justaskingquestions crowd makes me feel crazy for getting upset, and then villanizes me for being the upset one. But obviously I'd get more upset than them, they're the ones erasing me.

So normally I just slink away from these places, whether it's online, or my (supportive) boyfriend's shitty white family, or my uni alum groups, or my workplace. And that's the most demoralizing part, that they can say whatever they want and I have no recourse other than to leave.

So it means a lot to me that I don't have to leave here. That I can say my piece and have it backed up by the mods, not bullied & downvoted into submission.

I genuinely support people asking in good faith. Some white people just don't understand and they want to. But by the 2nd or 3rd response it's very clear which are in good faith and which are simply camouflaging their intolerance. So thank you for shutting the latter down.

I'm so glad that the mods aren't getting steamrolled into submission. I was having a bad mental health day today and some of these comments really bothered me. Immediately my reddit-trained mind was like, oh, you dumbass snowflake. Touch grass.

But then I was like, fuck, the whole reason I'm on Beehaw is because it's supposed to be different here. Thanks for continuously affirming my belief in it 👍

I just want to pipe in and and say thank you for caring about diversity. Lots of discourse here about how that's hostile to white people. In my opinion purposefully misinterpreting "unfortunate" to mean "white people not welcome" is a perfect representation of why WHY diversity matters.

Because as a POC it's clear to me that there are valid reasons why a white-dominated community can be... Uncomfortable. Like the very comments here that push back and pretend that race isn't a issue and that POC are racist ones for caring about it. Not bothering at all to understand where it's coming from and why it matters.

Edit: I didn't write this at first but I can't bite my tongue anymore. White people who get hositle over this have suffered from main character syndrome for way too long. You feel unwelcome because some online community simply wants more diversity? Why is it that in your mind one more POC means one less white person? Speaks more about your world view than anything else.

I've felt unwelcome my entire life because people resent my intrusion into their white bubbles. The whole point of Beehaw is that it's inclusive. I'm a snowflake who wants her safe space.

Idk if I'm just dumb or something but I have tried to play terraria on 5+ separate occasions and the controls and UI just DON'T make sense to me. Like how to craft?! How to equip? How to do stuff? It was just so confusing. I tried on mobile and steam deck. I even looked up the controls online and mapped it out. It just never clicked for me. I felt like an 80 year old using a smartphone for the first time.

You articulated my issue with it perfectly. In theory it was this amazing open world with tons of player freedom, but the minute you engage with the actual story at all you have no choice in anything. There was one quest where I HAD to rescue Micah and kill a butt load of people which really annoyed me given I was going for a white hat run.