HonkyTonkWoman @ HonkTonkWoman @lemm.ee

Posts

20

Comments

632

Joined

2 yr. ago

Now I kinda want to know what constitutes medieval truck nuts…

Sir Edmond of The Rusty Dongs: "Oi, fit bird, I wanna take you 'ome and give you a ride in me full kit until you come down with the rusty nail and Jack the Ripper."

Unfortunately, the rest of his human sized fecal cohort have gerrymandered the living hell out of this state. There’s a decent chance they’ve rigged it up well enough this year that he could win.

All I can do is hope my neighbors see through his bullshit & vote for their neighbors over hate.

FRANKENCITRUS!!

Given that it followed you, I wonder if it thought you might scare up some dinner for it.

I have one that hangs around my backyard when I’m out there, especially when I’m mowing.

I’ve always wondered if the mower scared field mice into moving, make them easier for the hawk to track/hunt.

Glad to hear you’re doing better! I love firearms, but do not allow myself to own one for that very reason.

If I owned a firearm, there’s a really good chance I’d either be in jail for stupidity or in the ground at this stage.

I didn’t commit suicide.

I had a plan, had it all laid out, and knew when I was ready.

Proceeded to get life saving-ly drunk & passed out. Woke up with a knife in my hand the next morning & knew I need to go to the hospital.

Cleaned myself up, called in sick to work, & went to UCLA Med.

Still here today thankfully. And as much as I appreciate what bourbon did for me that night, I have slowed my consumption significantly & have my head on straight.

I had a “condition” when I drank to much, that I called the “The ‘ol Burp & Purge.”

Anytime I drink too much, especially drinks with carbonation, I hit a point where I know I have to burp, but that burp is going to bring everything back up with it.

I got to the point that I could I calmly state “I need to burp” and I’d retreat to a bathroom.

My roommate at the time knew exactly what was going on. He’d seen numerous occasions where I did not go to the bathroom to burp & knew what followed.

I eventually learned that everyone else we drank profusely with just assumed I was a ridiculously polite drunk.

It leads to sexy fun time shenanigans with black bears, whether you eat steak during your sexy fun time shenanigans is up to you.

Knuckle Children deserve long & fruitful lives!

PERSONHOOD FOR KNUCKLE CHILDREN NOW!!

If Space Cowboys taught us anything….

Here’s a pic

Not in the least sweetheart.

Disco.

Yep.

Followed by one of those “snarky ‘lil passive aggressive question cliches”, I see.

I’m late the game here, but I think I found the answer.

You have abnormal fascination with the fact that this particular father did not father the way you wish he had fathered.

Did Scotty sign a waiver stating he would follow your fatherly guidelines?

My guess is Operating rooms would be considered private, but EMTs… They clearly operate in public.

Ah, that’s a good call!

I’m a big fan of Justified & looked Ganstageass up back during the original run, but have failed to keep up with them. Will have to catch up!

There’s also “SlamGrass” out there as a genre. I’ve only had the chance to see O’ Death, but I really dig their tune, “Only Daughter”.

Since you’re going outside the Rock genre with hip-hop, I’ll double down.

Here’s The Gourds with a bluegrass take on Gin and Juice.

It’s a damn fine performance, but the funniest part was that back in the days of Napster & Limewire, everyone just assumed that it was Phish covering the song.