GooberEar @ GooberEar @lemmy.wtf

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11 mo. ago

The secret to good tuna salad is to add something crunchy (celery, water chestnut, firm relish), something sweet (sweet relish, pinch of sugar), hard boiled egg yolk or diced whole hard boiled egg, and a small amount of breadcrumbs or crushed crackers to absorb excess moisture, with crackers being slightly tastier due to added sodium but breadcrumbs being preferred if you need to reduce sodium. You can also substitute canned salmon or similar for the tuna if mercury and pollutants are a cause for concern. And of course, a dollop of real mayonnaise, not artificially sweetened, hydrogenated and whipped vegetable byproduct.

This made me recall an odd bank related situation that happened to me a few weeks ago, and which I am still a bit perplexed by.

Due to a couple of things coming up, I needed to stock up on some bills of various denominations. Nothing all that crazy, in my opinion, 20 $1 bills, 20 $5 bills, stuff like that, a few hundred dollars at most. Where else do you get bills like that? The bank, I assumed.

When I got up to the teller, I explained that I needed to pull out X amount from my account, and I that I needed specific number of each denomination. She looked at me like I was asking something completely unheard of. She even told me, I don't think I have the money for that as she shuffled through some drawers.

Eventually she asked another teller who told her she'd have to go to the central terminal (I don't recall the actual name they used) and make a request for each denomination. So the teller walked across the back of the bank to a computer that looked like it was from the 80s. After about 10 minutes of typing, with multiple people helping her, 2 people came out from a room, walked over to a floor vault and opened it. While one pulled out the cash I requested, the other stood guard. It was surreal. They counted the money twice, the teller counted the money twice, and then finally came back to the counter and gave me the deposit. She seemed to be barely holding back her level of irritation at me.

All that for just a few hundred dollars in cash. It had me really wondering if I was mistaken about the role and services provided by banks and whether I was out of line for asking to receive specific denominations. Was I supposed to leave a tip or something?

I mean, at the end of the day, candy is candy and three dollars is three dollars.

If you just cut out a half dozen eggs per day from your budget, you'll be fine. And if that's not enough. then make coffee at home and stop ordering avocado toast, too. Did you know you can also sell your plasma for money and I think they even take gay people's blood now, too.

I USED TO HAVE CARDBOARD NOW I HAVE KEYBOARDS.

Rent is due in 28 days and in 28 days rent is due. That means all you have to do is make a whole bunch of money between now and then, that way you can pay your rent. So the options are limited, but that doesn't mean there isn't any option at all for you. For instance, if you just had some rich parents, you could take out a small multi-million dollar loan from them and pay your rent out of that. If you have a nice body and you know how to work it, you could become a high end hooker like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman, and then it would only take a handful of dates per month to pay off all your bills. Barring those options, you could convince your friends to sell their plasma and donate the proceeds to you. But you'd have to have a lot of friends to make that work, and let's be honest. You don't seem like the type to have that many friends. On the other hand, we could try to make you a Go Fund Me and then send it viral. Had a friend whose hamster got leukemia and they paid for the chemo with a Go Fund Me.

Why can't they just make one universal standard format and then just stick to that in all systems rather than have 400 million random different incompatible file systems running around? Wouldn't 400 million and 1 be better?

I'm sittin' on the dock of the bay, wasting time.

Is Pixelfed hosted on a Pentium II or did I just pick a really bad time to click the link?

I'm just a dumb normie, but it looks pretty clear to me that this is the goal. And even if it's not purely the goal, it's certainly the completely expected and predicted outcome of this chaos.

He's got some things going for him. Male. Presumably heterosexual. Caucasian. Old (but perhaps not quite old enough). I say go for it.

Oh my my my, little pony.

How much butter could a butter churn churn if a butter churn could churn butter? I asked AI and it gave me this big long explanation that started with the history of butter churning and ended up with some facts about the traditional way of making yak butter which I did not even know was a thing but it is and that thing is butter.

To be honest, I'm so sexual-relationsing old that I remember when the word meme actually meant something before it was appropriated and adapted for use to refer to the digital images we share electronically after adding text over them.

High five back at you, my friend.

As a gaymo, I'm just gonna say both of them are 1000000000000% percent hotter in this photo than in real life. AIRump got some biggass arms and bear-like belly, and Elmo barely look like actual Elmo because he has an actual human body shape.

You got to lick it before you kick it.

The Super Nintendo Metroid game was/is my favorite, but I'll admit I haven't play most of the Metroid games, so I'm not a good judge.

The NES game was a ton of fun, but I felt and feel like the SNES game was just all of that and then some, if that makes sense to others.

I played one of the 3D Metroid games (the one on the Wii). It was fun, I enjoyed what I played. But it did not scratch the same itch, if that makes sense. In fact, I don't think I even played that game to completion.

Here's my purely capitalistic problem with Amazon:

A decade+ ago, I realized that major brands were using the site as their outlet store. I'd buy a pack of socks, and they'd be hideously deformed. I'd buy a few pants for work, one pair would be too small, one too large, and one would fit just right. I'm not fucking Goldilocks.

The final straw for me was when my coffee maker broke. I ordered a new one via same day shipping, which at the time had a minimum order of something like $50. The coffee maker did not cost quite enough, so I added something random to the order so that my same day shipping would be free. Ultimately, the coffee maker arrived late (i.e. not the same day) and the decanter was broken.

When I contacted Amazon about the issue, the agent said they could reship, but they wouldn't send it same day so for that specific item it was going to take 3 - 5 days to arrive. They also tried to hassle me with a straight up return, telling me I had to take it to a UPS store, which at the time was 30+ minutes away.

Ultimately, I pulled a Karen and told them to cancel my Amazon Prime, which they did. Only problem is, I was 2 or 3 months into the year long subscription and assumed I'd get a pro-rated refund. I did not. When I got back in touch with customer service, they told me that Amazon adds up the value of the "free" shipping I received, the rental value of the movies and shows I watched on Prime, and the value of all the other services included with Prime and if that total exceeds the remaining value of the Prime subscription, then no refund.

They basically stole almost a year of Prime from me with no recourse.

Scum company. I got a lot of hate for saying this back in those days. But at least now, a decade+ later, people are finally starting to wake up. Not everyone, obviously. But at least I don't get hateful responses and DMs quite as much as I used to.

I'm bookmarking this link so I can read it when I have the time. Having said that, it should be clear that I haven't read the article, yet.

For me personally, 80's and 90's 2D Metroid and Castlevania games were fun, but for me, something transcendental happened with the release of Castlevania: Symphony of the Night. I'm 100% certain that I am incapable of truly putting it into words, but I'm sure a myriad of people have done it, and done it far better than I ever could. I bought the game on a whim because I enjoyed Castlevania 3 on the NES so much. Other than fighting games, 2D games were basically blasé for 90's 32-bit systems like the original PlayStation. Truthfully, I'm having a hard time recalling at the moment why I decided to buy the game. But I'm absolutely 10010% sure it was a good idea and I'm honestly thankful to my teenage self for that decision.

Modern Metroidvanias are fun, too. Truth be told, I gave up on Hollow Knight. I'm a patient, older gamer, so maybe that comes into play. But it eventually got to a point where it simply wasn't fun anymore. I was confused about what I needed to do next and I wasn't making any progress in the game. And then I had to set it aside for almost a year. When I tried to return, my memory had faded to the point where I really struggled to play it and make progress. That made me immensely sad. Once I realized that, I simply set it aside.

On the other hand, I played all the Nintendo DS Castlevania Metroidvania games back in the day and even still own the original cartridges. Via Steam, I also played the Gameboy Advanced Castlevanias. They are so much fun for me. So much fun that I purchased the Dominus collection on Steam, which is essentially all the DS games that I already own.

I also played Bloodstained: ROTN. I know there's a lot of criticism about the game, but I'll be honest, I loved every freakin' minute of it. I wasn't a huge fan of the graphics, but the game play was exactly what I needed at the time and I don't regret that purchase one bit.

And to finalize things, nice to meet other Metroidvania lovers. We might not all agree on the nitty-gritty details, but it's still neat to hear from others. Back in the 90s when I was absolutely in love with SOTN despite the fact that everybody else was hating on it entirely because it's a "2D platformer", it was hard to imagine that ~30 years later there would be entire communities of people who love these types of games.