31415926535 @ 31415926535 @lemm.ee

Posts

9

Comments

175

Joined

2 yr. ago

Worked at a day center that cared for adults with developmental disabilities. Part of my job was picking up, dropping off clients, event trips, activities. In my 1st 3 months there, I saw:

Coworker parked bus, pushed wheelchair client onto lift, walked away to smoke a cig. Client and wheelchair 10 feet off pavement, not tied down.

Some staff had to clean, change diapers. They would grab clients, throw them down, rip diapers off, spray lysol on their genitals.

In parking lot, coming back from trip, coworker shoved client so hard he fell face first into asphalt, bleeding, tooth chipped.

I could go on.

I tried talking with manager several times. She didn't care. I really needed the money, but couldn't stomach it, called adult protective services, who came out, and they got in serious trouble, shut down temporarily, manager fired, fines, etc. Lost the job, but don't regret it.

Loved Harvey. My favorite episodes are crackers don't matter, unrealized reality, Kansas, won't get fooled again. Rygel in John's body trying to figure out how to pee in a corner always cracks me up. Humans are SUPERIOR!!!

A week's nothing. Think my top score was 3 months with absolutely no sleep. Lifelong insomnia ftw.

Edit. Meant to say 1 month with no sleep. Don't think 3 months no sleep is physically possible. I can last maybe 3 to 4 months of just 1 to 2 hours sleep a night, before complete collapse.

Oh yes. Adhd, autism here, so severe over stimulation, impulse issues. Also. Grew up in abusive, violent childhood, where the only conflict resolution taught me was to yell, scream, throw things, lose it. Took me years of therapy to to try to overcome. These are what helped the most, some I do daily.

Dbt, cbt. Focusing on chatter in brain, learning to control it. Various centering, grounding exercises, including

Narrating my actions. Now I'm opening the door, now reaching into pocket...

Close eyes, focus on each of the 5 senses in turn.

Close eyes, just move, without thought, I do this a lot, it looks kinda like Tai chi.

I have a lot of mantras, including:

Let go of the anger, let go of the hate. Don't become emotionally attached to an abuser. No assumptions, no expectations, no judgment. This is not all of me. Observe, describe, participate. I am both observer and observed.

I've learned anger can be useful. Helps recognize problem. Spurs to action. But it's self sabotaging long term. I don't like feeling out of control, consumed with hate. I don't enjoy hurting ppl.

Becoming a violent, out of control abuser, to me, is embarrassing. It's low class, uneducated, and I'm so much better than that. I try to learn from my mistakes, gain greater control over myself.

To be filled with hateful anger towards someone, that means they have power over me. It's a form of intimacy, commitment, and why would I expose myself , become that intimate with someone I don't like?

Ymmv.

Was in a hotel. Hadn't slept in a week. Woke up, leaned over to get out of bed. Still asleep, slipped crashed hard into sharp bed table corner. Even asleep, quick reflexes meant I didn't cave my skull in. Instead, I found myself in a ball on the floor, my arm split open , entire forearm blue black and purple, gushing blood. Still have a scar from it 2 years later.

I change laptops frequently. Used to buy songs from iTunes and every time I changed laptops, transferred music over, I'd lose access to them. Would have to go thru insane process to be allowed to listen to the music I'd paid for.

Similar thing would happen with some software, Adobe especially.

If you're going to treat me like a criminal, then I might as well be a criminal. Same with purchasing movies on Amazon.

I tried to pay for minecraft, but 2 hours later, Microsoft wouldn't let me. Kept trying to make me an Hotmail account.

Growing trend in software I'm not happy with. No longer allowed to own the things we buy, and forced to hand over my email, phone number, address, name, create account... used to be, you could just buy things, simply. That was that.

Corporations are getting drunk with power, overreaching, infiltrating people life.

Also, if in poverty, no food, homeless, etc. If I can't afford what I need. And can get it another way, I will

Depression is circumstantial, been trapped in overcrowded slums below poverty level. What I need is a safe, clean, stable place to live, and help finding a job. Instead I'm surrounded by drug addicts, screaming, violence, overcrowding, filth; social services meager, bureaucratic and strained. It wears one down.

I need society to be better

Mists of avalon, by Marion Zimmer Bradley. Was questioning the faith I'd been raised in, and reading this book, a feminist retelling of Arthurian fantasy, as a teen... it clicked, that religion is subjective

Namaste. Anyone I've met who uses that word has always turned out to be a preachy, holier than thou, self involved tool.

Anybody on the autism spectrum just laughs sadly, shakes head quietly, when told 'just be your self'

If these items still work, there's lots of people in homeless shelters who'd be grateful. Maybe dump small box in front of shelter during day, or ask staff if any of their clients could use them

When my laptops die, I take them apart to find the hard drive, which I then turn to an external drive. Just put it inside an enclosure, good to go.

Try checking out laptop repair stores, not big chains. The mom n pop ones. Often they can use parts.

And, cuz I'm weird, sometimes I disassemble, turn them into art, as part of larger mixed media projects.

Where I live, there's a nonprofit that takes old electronics and laptops, has volunteers repair them, who get work experience. Worthy cause

Def Leppard, pour some sugar on me

I took 2 years of Latin in high school, but that was decades ago, so you may be right

I'm in the same boat, you're not alone. Well, you are, kind of, but a lot of us are alone, struggling, trying to make it work. One just has to keep trying, so good on you

Past month, started working with oil pastels, had to stop cuz homelessness past 8 years. But now studio apt, trying to get back on feet, art starting to take off. Fab dream last night, trying to find a safe place in a homeless shelter that was also an art school.

Only tangentially related: Latin, the dead language, heavily tied into romantic, classical education. I recently found out that Latin in general wouldn't say, I did this, but instead, this was done. Less of an emphasis on individual agency. Fascinating aspects about linguistics, how thought, sense of self has evolved over millenia.

YES! it's so rare I find anyone else who's seen farscape. only tv show I wish I could see again for the 1st time.

Currently rewatching agents of shield, season 5 right now. As always, was floored by the Aida character, mallory jansen was phenomenal in that role, absolutely killed it.

Yesterday, I finally decided to cut ties with reddit, except for targeted web searches. First it was the constant attempts to force me to download their app. Then denying me access to certain posts and subreddits cuz I wouldn't. Then the API debacle. Then few days ago, significant redesign that wasn't for usability, but for money,. Corporate greed. Used to spend hours on reddit, but past few weeks, there's hardly any worthwhile content. One has to be careful what one gets used to. Grateful I discovered lemmy yesterday.