Statistics

The slow motion punches always amuse me.

Similarly, there are a lot of really lazy bad maps out there that are trying to make some point about a statistic, but are really just population density maps. Give your up votes to the person that links the appropriate xkcd.

I like to say, "Stastically you're much more likely to die in a car accident on the way to the beach than be attacked by a shark once there."

So people are less afraid of sharks and more afraid of each other, like it should be.

Maybe, but if we rode on sharks to get around I'm sure the statistic would be different.
- We wouldn't get far before the shark would asphyxiate though, I think it's a bad replacement for cars
"Who here plans on driving their car today? Show of hands!" ... "I recommend getting to know these people, because you are far more likely to die in an car accident caused by a stranger than by someone you know. But also don't upset them, as you are far more likely to be murdered by someone you know rather than a stranger."
"Mr Tourguide, aren't you supposed to talk about sharks?"

Actually vending machines just have an insatiable bloodlust.

I would too if people thought shaking me would make me give them chocolate
Coconut trees need the nutrients of the fallen
- We should take hundreds of vending machines into a field and corral them

And I heard you'll more likely die on your way to collect your win than actually win the lottery.

And I heard home is a very dangerous place, cos lots of people die because of it...or at it?

That's something that always gets me with certain safety recalls.
Like the Samsung Note 7's second recall. Something like 1 out of 2 million phones caught fire. It just happened to do it on an airplane and got the phones banned by the FAA. Nobody was injured by the phones catching fire.
How many people died in car wrecks going to the store to swap out their phones?
- driving is an apt choice to compare because it's fucking disgusting how many people it kills every day and no one seems to give a flying fuck about it.
  society is constantly actively choosing to let people die in horrible crashes simply because it is convenient.
- How many of those people were only going to swap their phone though? How many would have been driving anyway. How many would have been killed doing something else because they weren't going to swap out their phone...
  While an interesting thought, there's no way to know an alternate timeline of events.

Cows are smarter than they look. Long ago I worked in a dairy operation and they would do things to fuck with you... like if you weren't super careful in a milking stall they'd casually lean to one side ("oopsie! my bad") to squish you. Or let the poop rip at just the right moment.

I don't blame them one bit.

I had a VERY close call against a cow once. Never seen a coyote, so I can't really compare.

Coyotes aren't super big and alone are pretty timid and rarely approach things bigger than it (like an adult human). Though when starving or other certain conditions drive them to approach larger animals or big open space (I.E. in a pack, or rabies), be mightily wairy.
(This is anecdotal experience only, please take it and reference it as such only)
Where do you live that there are cows but not coyotes? I thought coyotes were more or less a worldwide nuisance anywhere rural enough to have cattle.
- Outside of North America 😳

I always think about this when people say vending machines are more likely to kill you than sharks.

Are they looking at vending machines only in beach cities or in the middle of like, Arizona too?

I also feel that vending machines don't really suddenly strike you without warning and through no fault of your own
- Tell me you live in a safe neighborhood without saying you live in a safe neighborhood....
  Your "feeling" are invalidating hundreds of peoples lived experience of the terror of vending machine gang violence
- I mean they do. By not giving me the food I just paid for
- The chances are low, but never zero.

There's also a possibility that if humans live coyotes closely for several generations, it is likely to end up domesticated - one way or another.

Oh hang on, millions of humans already do live closely with domesticated canids.

A few days ago i tried to look up the genus of my dog breed with the presumption i would find like a family tree of how breeds relate to eachother.
Turns out the scientific name for my dog is “Canis familiaris”
So is the scientific name of literaly any dog breed, its literally latin for “domesticated canine”
So yeah a domesticated coyote would indeed just count as a dog breed like any other. Scientific literature wouldn’t consider it any other way
A better stat for the post would be you have a higher chance of being hurt by domesticated animals then getting attacked out of the blue by wild animals.
- the reason all domestic dogs are canis familiaris is because they're all the same species. They can all have non-sterile babies with each other, which is the most commonly accepted definition of a species. A domesticated coyote would still be its own species and get its own scientific name because it would not be able to breed with dogs, at the very least without having a sterile baby.

People shaking coconut trees are often crushed by falling people who don't exist within the context of all in which they live and which came before them.

.... oh

someone once shook a vending machine vigorously for me when my snack was stuck. it was very stressful to watch

Cows are 300 times more likely to kill someone than coyotes. Not you.

Are you sure about that? My cholesterol has been looking mighty high lately.

I’ve never seen a cow killing a coyote.

Coyotes are pretty small though, I think cattle would still be more dangerous.

You have clearly never been in a holding pen with 300 coyotes. Cows are not pack hunters.
- Neither are coyotes, at least not by nature. They may live in a pack, but they typically travel and hunt solo or in pairs.
- Im pretty sure you haven't been either

You exist in the context of all In which you live and that came before you

neo_whoa.gif

Yeah this is incorrect because people that breed dogs almost never are killed by the dogs they breed.

It also helps that neither dogs nor coyotes are heavy enough to crush you by accident
- ... your mom?
Dogs kill about twice as many people per year as cows in the US.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fatal_dog_attacks_in_the_United_States
https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s12024-024-00786-8
No, their kids are though