I was handed this lovely flyer while grocery shopping

Have they been subject to medium to long term safety testing on humans?

Yes. For over two years now. Using a population of hundreds of millions of people and a control population of people who xerox misinformation and hand it out to strangers in grocery stores.

News flash: the vaccinated ones are doing way better.

As an addendum, the idea that a vaccine can produce side effects years down the line is a myth. A vaccine is a one-time payload - if any side effects are going to crop up, they will inevitably be in the few weeks following vaccination as your body processes it. After that, if nothing has gone awry, you're good.
- My 5G mobile coverage improves about 7 days after my annual shot.
  I figure by 2027 I can ditch my home router.
- As an addendum addendum, I have some news for people worried about long-term effects of encountering only the spike proteins: you're really going to hate the long-term effects from taking that virus raw.
Using a population of ~~hundreds of millions~~ billions
Billions of people were vaccinated. Hardly anything happened.
- I remember being told everyone vaccinated would be dead within six months.
  It's been a very long six months.
  Similarly, I don't hear climate change deniers talking about the solar cycle anymore...
Or, y'know, literal decades (centuries?) by medical professionals
- For vaccines in general, yes. But kooky people that think this is some kind of trick are worried about it being an mRNA vaccine, which is indeed somewhat new. The idea has been around for about fifty years, but the first human clinical trials were only about a decade ago and COVID was the first large-scale human deployment.
  Now, in fairness, they were almost entirely ready at the time. I would imagine, without COVID, we probably would've still seen mRNA vaccines become mainstream already, though maybe last year or this year instead of in 2021. But COVID stepped up the final stages of approval significantly.

Funny how surgeons don't seem to have the problems this flyer describes.
And I better not open this person's closet and find a single scarf.

How anyone can still believe this shit just confounds me.

Not funny once you realize all doctors are actually lizard people in human skin suits performing experiments on us. QED sucker!

Did they just photocopy a flyer that was photocopied by someone else? Because this looks like it was about 15 steps from the original printing. Also, why hand these out now?

Sounds about right for these folks. Anytime you see an email like this it's always FW: FW: FW: FW: FW: FW: the Illuminati KILLED MY DOG with COVID masks!
- The Bavarian Illuminati?
They photocopied a wet copy lmao it has spills . Unless that’s OP

I have a dead uncle because of these nonsense theories he refused to wear a mask, social distance etc. The inevitable happened and he passed from covid within a week. All because of anonymous people on Facebook who I will never meet, and will never suffer the consequences of their actions. Makes me so angry

My friend died before he was able to get a vaccine dose. He was young and fit and healthy, enough so that his death was covered in a local newspaper. He'd have probably have gotten his first vaccine dose if we'd caught COVID a couple weeks later, and that might have been enough to save him. I'll never know, and maybe he'd have still died, but I'll always resent people who have/had the choice to be vaccinated but choose not to.

Some people have too much free time and too few brain cells.

All that mask wearing in their youth killed those cells.
And not enough access to credible sources

I’m high risk as I’m immunosuppressed. I’ve had 8 vaccines, shielded for well over a year and always wore a mask. I finally caught COVID last week. There’s not a doubt in my mind that I would have died already if I hadn’t been vaccinated. My oxygen saturation levels just keep dropping - 90% today. I’m going to have to go to hospital ☹️

I'm so sorry to hear it! I'm rooting for you and I know lots of other people are too!
Best of luck, get well soon

I’d be more annoyed that this person couldn’t even bother me with a more up to date conspiracy.

Right? They're still triggered about masks?

Yeah, don’t accept trash from strangers.

very blatantly, right in front of her, wipe your hands with sanitizer and then wipe down the flyer …

EDIT: “Oh, this isn’t for the virus, y’all just nasty.”

"I got the vaccine and nothing bad happen to m-" start convulsing and making gross sounds while dropping to the ground
"Ahhh! The 5G! It buuuurns!"
- When that stupid PSA warning came through that conspiracy theorists said would "activate" the vaccine I was in my MAGAt infested office. I fell to the floor and screamed "The vaccine!" as soon as I heard everyone's phones go off.
- I wonder if you could convince one of these people of something even more crazy.

Are there doctors and scientists recommending people NOT to take it?

There are morons in every field. We can't just look at the outliers.

Report her to the store for solicitation. Owners hate that, even if they agree with the sentiment. Can't scare away the customers.

Yeah, Jehovah's Witnesses know to wait till someone is coming out rather than inside or heading in for this very reason.

Bacteria gets a bad rap.

They’re the only culture some people have.
- I'm going to go with my gut on this one and say you're spot on.

Not aborted monkeys!!

This is far more than mildly infuriating, this is actively putting peoples lives at risk, it's enraging and quite scary, and why disabled and other vulnerable people are continuing to be more isolated than ever.

Fuck this person and the bullshit they spread. I rarely leave the house, but if I did and someone handed me something like this I'd grab the whole pile and set it on fire, casually roll over their feet with my wheelchair on my way, too (E: actually, scratch that, I wouldn't want to get that close to the disease vector, even with my mask on).

I’ve had it twice now and don’t mind getting close, otherwise agreed on all counts. Let’s hide the ~~accelerant~~ fairy juice under your chair, you can be getaway driver with clean hands. Tell me you have a rad van with wheel controls

Why is it in English but funded by some Spanish speaking organization

To make it seem like legitimate. "These other doctors in other countries are speaking out about it, while the establishment in this country is suppressing the "truth""
- Yeah, but just based on my own prejudices, the antivax community ain't a huge fan of the Spanish- speaking community.

I would say some unfiltered shit at any moron that handed me something like this. It would probably be exactly what they want, but I would belittle them with every fiber of my being in the hopes that something sticks and they feel bad. It would make me feel a little better, but I am also a big man child sometimes.

Jesus - I thought COVID wiped all these twits out already.

Why can't they just go back to handing out Chick tracts? At least those were funny.

I'm still mad I never learnt any "real" spells, nor was never invited to join a coven, despite fulfilling a 1-20 D&D campaign. Dark Dungeons lied to me!!
- I do love that Jack had apparently spent about 10 minutes in the library's periodicals room reading articles about D&D and decided he knew enough about it to make that comic.
Why can’t they just go back to handing out Chick tracts? At least those were funny.
Speaking about the website/comics itself, I don't think 'bait and switch' would be a method that Jesus would want to be used to get people to convert to Christianity.
I was handed one of these when I was on a church trip as a teenager. One of many many reasons I became disillusioned, but pretty funny in retrospect.
- Oh they're great. I sometimes go look at their archives for a chuckle since all of their tracts are there for free. Most people's favorite is Dark Dungeons, which is about how D&D is satanic, but I have to say that my favorite would be Angels? which is about a Christian rock band who gets a manager named "Lew Siffer" and don't notice that there may be something weird there, but it's probably because they're very stupid, because their subsequent hit song goes something like "We're gonna rock rock with the rock!"

“Honey, remember we were talking about how catching Covid multiple times makes you stupid?”

I like how page 1 says not to wear masks because they are bad put page 2 implies that you must wear a mask because getting the vaccine won’t allow you to not wear masks.

There's some loon still plastering their ill informed, anti Vax / anti mask stickers on every bit of street furniture across the nearby town centre.

We clearly need to bring back the big red rubber stamp. Just stamp it "SCAM" and leave it somewhere like a bulletin board. Because if they want to waste their money and paper, we should make it expensive for them. The stamp isn't expensive really and ink pads are fairly cheap and last a long time.

Some Android Phones might need a QR SCANNER app to open these

🤦

Crazy, the legend continues.

Still don't understand why there's no consequence for actively harming others.

Take an obvious picture of her with your phone. Hand out flyers with her face saying avoid this woman .

Honestly I'd love to go on that aircraft. Sounds like it'd be a pretty fun and exclusive experience.

Ask for more copy, turn it into toilet paper. Repeat.

Nah, dont infect your ass with stupid

Don't hand it back; rip it up and then apologize and ask for a second one. Then rip that one up, too.

I mean, that survey on the back isn’t lying, per se, but it’s taking things that are only minorly concerning and stating them in a way that is overblown or more alarming than they deserve.

“The best lies are based in truth”, I suppose.

What? Starting with the first one, thats already a lie. So is the third, they just don't understand what long-term means.
- A couple of them fall into the "technically true, but misleading territory" - I'm sure the person handing this out couldn't identify which though - broken clock right twice a day and all
  "Can you reverse effects" - no you can't make your immune system forget how to work. Probably not what they are going for here though.
  "Risk of [...] or other side effects?" - yeah the vaccines generally give people a headache and short lived fever symptoms
  "Have there been deaths?" - The astrazeneca vaccine had like a 0.000001% mortality risk (more likely to die driving to the pharmacy), and was pulled in many countries because that was deemed too dangerous. Person handing out the flyer has likely been parroting "mRNA vaccines cause blood clots" nonsense for years while being completely unaware that AZ was a traditional viral vector vaccine
  "Are there doctors recommending NOT taking it" - yeah, there are many notable anti-vaccine doctors, what they typically have in common is they earned their doctorate in computer science, social studies, or some other field that gives them no qualifications to talk about immunology

It would annoy me just as much to receive pro vaccine propaganda. Even the vaccine commercials annoy me.

I don't get it

At least those actually save lives.
- I don't care. You shouldn't force vaccines on people.

People who wear masks can never tell me why, if I wear underwear how come I can still smell my own farts?

Let me sneeze in your face and I'll let you sneeze in my face but you're wearing a mask.
See, it was not that hard to understand.