I knew he had a point

Yeah this one always disturbed me so here's an OC greentext

Be me satan

Get made without asking

Has to obey jod no exception

Puts up with it

Jod makes a new one

Now that guy is above me and i have to respect him too for no reason ???

Respectfully decline

Jod throws a tandrum

Now have to rule eternal hell

How is jod still considered good anons ??

Satan ≠ The Devil. That's new testament retconning.
Jod? I know of a reference for that but for some reason I don't think 4chan has red Tamsyn Muir.
- The only reference I know of is a meme relating the GIF/GIF pronunciation..."what if God one day just came down and said 'it's pronounced Jod'"

reminder that the Satanic Temple is one of the most based organizations around the world, they fight for equal rights and against preferential treatment of any one religion, and their tenets are genuinely really good guidelines:

One should strive to act with compassion and empathy toward all creatures in accordance with reason.
The struggle for justice is an ongoing and necessary pursuit that should prevail over laws and institutions.
One's body is inviolable, subject to one's own will alone.
The freedoms of others should be respected, including the freedom to offend. To willfully and unjustly encroach upon the freedoms of another is to forgo one's own.
Beliefs should conform to one's best scientific understanding of the world. One should take care never to distort scientific facts to fit one's beliefs.
People are fallible. If one makes a mistake, one should do one's best to rectify it and resolve any harm that might have been caused.
Every tenet is a guiding principle designed to inspire nobility in action and thought. The spirit of compassion, wisdom, and justice should always prevail over the written or spoken word.

Yup. I'm a registered Satanist <3
No to be confused with the church of satan.
I'm a Christian, but I hold the Satanic Temple in high regard.
- Similar here, if i wasn’t already spiritual occupied with something i am comfortable with this could have been the one.
  I am not a christian but the idea that is Jesus remains a massive inspiration for me, i hope you don't mind me saying this next bit that the satanic temple closely resembles the teachings of Jesus, be empathetic, treat as equal and willingness to rebel (chasing loan sharks out of the church)

The "First Sin" these people would fear so much, bad enough to cast man from Eden forever and damn us to a mortal life away from God, was just knowledge. That Adam and Eve were no longer simple, naive children that would never question anything was beyond redemption apparently.

That the whole thing is more likely a parable for the loss of childhood (ie Eden) as one moves into adulthood is lost on these idiots. Fucking Barbie tells the same story without people tearing apart society or killing each other over it.

Hail Barbie?
I have a theory that until a couple hundred years ago, the vast majority of the world was still the "garden of Eden," and the aboriginal nations of the Americas, Australia and Micronesia, and Africa were it's stewards
- That sure is one of the theories of all time

Also wanted humans to have knowledge and know right from wrong. This guy is sounding better and better.

The serpent was the hero in the story of the garden of Eden.
The egotistical man child was the equivalent of a psychopathic 10 year old with a couple hamsters in a cage where the best food is hooked up to a 12v battery.
- Depends on how you look at it. My theory is that the "garden of Eden" is still barely around and being tended to by aboriginals in Australia, Africa, the Americas, and maybe oarts of Siberia. A few hundred years ago, more than 50% of the world would have still been the "garden of Eden," looking at it that way. I firmly believe that "the apple," is writing and bronze/ iron working.
  If you're hoping for a sustainable society, The Iroquois Six Nations did it for 15,000-25,000 years. In that way, the serpent isn't the hero, so much as the foil.

So what's the intended message of the sign? That wanting to be treated equally is somehow sinful?

I am guessing that it is a shop. Even for Baptists that is a bit on the nose. Usually they keep it to euphemism for a metaphor.
- You give them too much credit. Different church, but...

Christians: making Satan sound cool since always.

Wouldn't it be better to say Lucifer? No one called him Satan at the time he demand equal rights.

No one called him Lucifer at the time either.
Which brings me to one of my favourite Jimmy Carr snappy QI answers:
Stephen Fry: How many of each animal was there on Noah's Ark?
Jimmy Carr, without missing a beat: None. It didn’t happen.
- "All right, smartass, how many of each animal was there in the story of Noah's Ark?"
- Exactly. That's for sure the other wrong part of it.

Hail!

Based Satan.

Where the TST homeboys at?!

Not even true. He wasn't demanding "equal rights," he wanted to rule.

he wanted to rule.
Like god does. He wanted to be his equal.
- Speaking in terms of angelic lore, more specifically, he was the first angel to gain free will. When God created Man, Angels were placed below Man on the hierarchy. And Lucifer, God's most beautiful, most radiant Seraph, disagreed with this idea. He disagreed with this because God made Lucifer and all the other Angels first.
- Exactly.

Punctuaction...

To be fair not everyone is equal, not even within a single household.

There's a difference between equality and egality.
- What's the difference?