Or maybe it's an example of a "gotcha question", asked to introduce the subject of such. Because there is ambiguity there. Or maybe I'm feeling my way along and checking to see where your answers switch from "responsive" to "defensive".
Some people straightman it to the death, so the line is hard to find. Which could be called defensive from the start.
99% of these conversations are you talking to yourself. I think that's important to consider.
We're talking about the realness of reality here.
This gender stuff seems rather petty, comparatively.