I live in Oklahoma. Everything this man says is true. Real shithole, this part of the country. That and the shit schools are what make the houses so cheap.

If you live in Moore, don't blink. You might miss the tornado sweeping your house away. Again.

One of my favorite movies that my wife refuses to watch with me because it always makes her cry.

I mean, me too, but it's good to cry every now and then.

OUR PRICES HAVE NEVER BEEN LOWER!

Imagine the government actually doing something that appeals to millennials.

Them: Be there or be square!

Me:

jk, nobody invites me to things

"It costs $400,000 to fire this weapon...for twelve seconds."

I present a similar picture of my Thorin.

He got brushed, and I put the hair on his head.

Elastic deformation is for peasants.

DVDs are dirt cheap, plentiful as fuck, don't have DRM bullshit to have to deal with, last for decades when stored properly, and still look pretty damn good with deinterlacing. Plus, they don't run any of the risks associated with piracy. Am I allowed to copy my DVDs onto my hard drive? That may be a legal gray area. But can they see that I copied my DVDs to my hard drive? Of course not. And I'm not making my ISOs and MKVs available to the world for download.

Spend 4 bucks on a used DVD. Give her the ol'

dd if=sr0 of=~/Videos/Movies/Title.iso

And keep the disc for basically forever. Copy it again if something happens to your file. EZPZ. Plus, it's cool to own a physical thing imo.

One last thing: DVDs come with subtitles. I have a hard time understanding spoken words. I like to read my movies as I watch them. Makes it easier to know what's going on without cranking the volume to 11. Speaking of which, the menu for the Spinal Tap DVD is excellent.

This is a heck of a post to come across for me right now.

That's not an apples to apples comparison. I am buying a single thing at a pump: fuel. I boop my card. I stick nozzle in hole. I pull lever until it stops. Vending machines? Second verse same as the first. I boop card. I push button. I take chippies, I walk away. Vending machines specifically are purpose-built for self-service.

I spend maybe 30 seconds to 3 minutes at these things. The only work I do is tapping my payment and pressing a button or two. Groceries are a whole different animal. It's scanning, weighing, coding, bagging, loading, and paying. It's a fuckton more involvement by the customer. I don't think you can in good faith compare self-checkout to a vending machine.

The business is incentivized to trick you into performing labor for them. Part of the cost of my groceries is for someone to have a job doing that. If I'm gonna do that labor for the store, I should get an employee discount, at least.

And why is that? Could it have anything to do with the fact that the business benefits by making the customers the employees, too? Would a business be in any way incentivized to make paying customers also perform labor for them?

The things boomers complain about aren't always wrong. I ain't their damn employee.

• The first rule of Water Club is that you always talk about Water Club.
• The second rule of Water Club is that you always talk about Water Club.
• If someone is sweaty or peeing yellow, the fight against their thirst is on.
• Only two cups of water (is not nearly enough)
• One cup of water at a time is plenty, but you should drink more
• No shirt, no shoes. Don't want to get those wet.
• Drinking will continue for as long as the subject is not properly hydrated.
• If this is your first glass of water today, you have to drink it.

Water fucking rules, man.

95% of all life dies

Horseshoe crabs:

He was the Hulk once so I can't blame you.

TRAINER TIPS: Any POKéMON that takes part in battle, however short, earns EXP!

Doggy doggy WHAT now?

Here's mine. I bought it new in 2015, and I wear it almost daily. It has never needed work.