mortemtyrannis @ mortemtyrannis @lemmy.ml

Posts

3

Comments

273

Joined

2 yr. ago

PSA: If you’re a guy on a dating site and you reply with just “hey” or something similar to a lady then you’ve fucked up.

You get one shot at a semi-witty reply that may get her to smile before your reply is buried under 100 other guys also vying for her attention.

Just quickly read her profile and make some kind of riff off of it with an open ended question.

“Hey blahblah I saw you liked The Office, I’m more of a fan of working from home myself.

Also, why’s everyone seem to be looking for Jim? Who’s that guy?”

Get new material Donald.

Hate is out, hope is in.

He has the big time rizz.

Nicole Shanahan seems to fit the definition of a psychopath.

I wonder if Greg has ever drunk baileys from a shoe.

Yes make it public.

No real reason not to.

Suck it you Venusian losers!

Go read or listen to literally any Medal of Honor citation.

If you think a Presidential Medal of Freedom is in any way close to those stories you must be a weirdo.

The myth that you can go to jail and it’s free board and food is exactly that, a myth.

You’ll pay for it one way or another.

It’s peddled by conservatives who think that jail is some kind of walk in the park. Sure there are nicer prisons but it’s still prison. No one really prefers it to being out on the street.

• TJ = Real estate Agent
• Gretchen = IT
• Vince = High School Coach
• Gus = Accountant
• Spinelli = graphic Designer
• Mikey = Shop assistant/aspiring playwright

Hate to break it to you, you’ve been drinking water made from something’s shit for as long as you’ve been alive.

Krankenwagen

Models come in all shapes and sizes, you don’t have to be Calvin Klein level to get jobs.

Did someone call an ambulance for him? Because she straight up annihilated him.

Stop. I can only get so erect.

I don’t get it, is she saying you’re well endowed?

Because this is the internet and you can just say you’re packing a huge hog. No one will really know or care.

For once a guy when the average voter says ‘they’re just like me!’ It’s actually true.

You know I didn’t even care whether he was a successful coach or not, I was waiting for the republicans to attack his coaching record or something like that. Turns out he was a damn good coach.

Also, the fact that the openly gay student felt comfortable approaching Walz and proposing his idea means they knew Walz was probably supportive before even asking. That says Walz must have been displaying his character openly.

Ahhh they are inextricably linked to a previous partner and you’re expected to become a parental figure if the relationship goes anywhere serious.

Some people (like me) really don’t want an instant family.

I take my hat off to those who don’t have kids but date parents; they are better people than I.

Yuck no. Pete is not what is needed.