People will probably keep asking until they learn that you don't want to answer. This is just how most people work and I understand your frustration at being an outlier in this way.
You can't control them feeling offended. You are behaving strangely to them and they're struggling to make sense of you. The most reasonable explanation to them is that you dislike them, which they'll construe as rude.
If you are direct with them, they might at least be able to make sense of you. "When I'm at work, I only want to work, then get out of here as soon as I can. That's why I don't socialize here. It's nothing personal."
Either they believe you or they don't. You can't make them believe you.
One last thing: just like you wish they'd stop making wrong assumptions about your motivations, you might consider challenging the assumptions you're making about them.
I don't think of it as developing a thicker skin, but after some weeks of practising metta meditation, I noticed that I found it easier not to take personally the actions of others. This is also known as loving-kindness meditation. It sounds very strange and yet it seems to help.
I used to think similarly and wonder how not to let these things bother me. Then that changed to letting them bother me, but for shorter periods of time. Now I tend to think of it as letting them bother me, but then not feeling bad about letting them bother me, which allows me to let go of those feelings sooner.
It's not a quick fix, but it might help you very much over the rest of your life. Even basic mindfulness meditation, such as breath meditation, might suffice to start.
"B if and only if A" is a shorthand way to write "B if A and B only if A". It's like how "He is young and thin" means "He is young and he is thin". We could write it the second way without trouble, but the first way is shorter, we agree that they mean the same thing, and we prefer to conserve energy when writing.
The form "if and only if" is merely a convenient shorthand. Shorthand is usually more convenient for the writer than for the reader. 🤷♂️
Imagine these natural language sentences and analyze how they are different:
I'll go outside if it's not snowing
I'll go outside only if it's not snowing
Hint: what do you do in each case when it's snowing?
Well, there's literal wage theft, which other folks have explained clearly here, then there's figurative wage theft, such as artificially depressing wages in order to redirect money to executives that they couldn't possibly spend nor reasonably need.
This sense of wage theft is more nebulous and therefore easier to be confused about. It wouldn't surprise me if you asked ten people about got ten different answers about it. There's nothing about my answer here that's authoritative; it's merely a short summary of how I understand the term as commonly used.
Writing documentation of all kinds seems like it would help a great deal. I would be hesitant to file UX complaints, because those tend to be ignored by programmers who focus their limited available time on fixing defects and shipping features.
Where are all the programmers who enjoy improving UX and enjoy the challenge of changing legacy code? 😉
Disrespectful or not, if you don't like it, then you don't like it. You might just email them about your experience and tell them what you want to have happen. Give them a chance to do that for you.
And ultimately, which do you value more: the season tickets or your preferred way of buying them? As far as I can tell, there's no wrong answer, but merely your preference.
Thank you. I know of it, but haven't read it. I probably know a very superficial version of the argument, but I might find a full-length description of it more credible. Even so, it seems more fortunate than inevitable to me.
On one hand, yes, absolutely; on the other hand, when the chips are down, we seem to choose violence over compassion and cooperation. Given how difficult living likely was in the distant past, I would have guessed that compassion would have died in the crib.
jbrains @ jbrains @sh.itjust.works Posts 2Comments 510Joined 2 yr. ago
People will probably keep asking until they learn that you don't want to answer. This is just how most people work and I understand your frustration at being an outlier in this way.
You can't control them feeling offended. You are behaving strangely to them and they're struggling to make sense of you. The most reasonable explanation to them is that you dislike them, which they'll construe as rude.
If you are direct with them, they might at least be able to make sense of you. "When I'm at work, I only want to work, then get out of here as soon as I can. That's why I don't socialize here. It's nothing personal."
Either they believe you or they don't. You can't make them believe you.
One last thing: just like you wish they'd stop making wrong assumptions about your motivations, you might consider challenging the assumptions you're making about them.
Good luck.