Paysafecard is perhaps an option to you. It's like a giftcard in that you buy it in cash and receive a code.
It's recommended to wear a fake moustache when buying the card, and make sure the color matches your actual hair color otherwise it's an immediate giveaway!
Just experience what you're feeling. The angst, despair, uncertainty. Imagine it accumulating for decades. All whilst the majority of people at best dismiss your experience, telling you to chill out, proclaiming your feelings aren't valid. Or worse, call you evil and anti-social :)
That's the emotional context in which the US was born, and why some people are attracted to it's constitution. It's an exceptionally intelligent response to those feelings.
But to people who can't empathize with those feelings: the colonies ceded from England due to taxes, they just didn't want to contribute their fair share into the commonwealth. They're evil and anti-social.
All the perceived privacy, constitution weirdos and early crypto enthousiast advocating for privacy laws start to make more sense when you don't consider your government as a perpetual force of good :)
I think you might like rustdesk