As long as the price is fair, I don't see why this should be a problem. It sounds like it should be mathematically equivalent to purchasing a percentage of everyone's shares. So share value goes down because you've essentially "sold" some of it to someone else without changing the absolute number of shares you own.
The noise you add won't even register. No two people are going to half-ass it the same way, so if you average everyone's responses, the correct answer comes out.
Regarding #1, it can work the same way that company ownership works now (e.g. when you buy shares on the stock market). I don't know how they inject money when times get tough but I've certainly never given them anything.
If you're your own audience, then you can keep the joker in your head. Posting it on Lemmy broadcasts it to everyone here and that makes all of us your audience.
It only works as a joke when your audience knows you well enough to know it's meant as a joke without the /s. That does not apply to you when you post on Lemmy.
It allows you to plan out what happens during/around it. For example, should my leisure time the day before be something more fun but cognitively demanding or more chill and relaxing?
It also allows you to get in the right state of mind for the work. In my experience (is this also an autistic thing? I don't know), if you're mentally prepared for something very difficult and unpleasant, it greatly cuts down on how unpleasant it is, sometimes even turning that difficult thing into a fun challenge. If you mentally prepare for something that's worse than what's actually ahead, you end up with way too much excess energy and the need to look for problems to solve even when no problems exist.
We're not comparing with fluoridated tap water because that's not something you can control as an individual. At most, you can put pressure on your city to add it in. Until that happens, and even after that happens, you still need to put in work to care for your own teeth. It's very unhelpful to tell someone living in a city with unfluoridated tap water to just choose fluoridated tap water. They do not have that choice.
That would be ideal, but each person has limited time and attention. Advocate for both, but put your efforts into figuring out how to change the thing with the larger impact.
Fair in the sense that both the buyer and "sellers" agree on the price.