hoshikarakitaridia @ hoshikarakitaridia @lemmy.world

Posts

3

Comments

570

Joined

2 yr. ago

Depends on how long and how often I think. If it was just 5min sometimes that's fine, if it's more than that or regularly it's at least weird and at most a dick move.

Nice

Echoing the rest of the comments here: as soon as he knew you were 13, for him to continue dating you is fucked up.

Also for him to blame you for making him date you is absolutely bizarre and stupid. HE decides whom to date.

And now to answer your question: I can only assume he doesn't feel sorry. I could believe he might feel guilty but that's because he realizes how fucked up the whole thing is. I can't say for sure, and I don't think he really tries to reflect, otherwise he wouldn't even have gone that far.

That is so stupid it makes me mad.

WotC and Hasbro are truly the Dalton's of tabletop gaming.

The Csam caching is the worst issue.

So many countries basically regulate that if you have Csam on your PC you can go to jail. So if you're hosting, and even if it gets deleted, that still means it was on the server. And that shit is bad.

Legally frightening.

To me it sounds like something other than depression, however it doesn't matter because you are clearly right, these are extremely unhealthy thinking patterns and it is a symptom of maybe bigger issues you need to address.

And it is true, everyone deserves love and there's nothing about you that makes you categorically undesirable. Just some things specific people like or don't like about you.

You should consider talking to a therapist, or at least someone who is not involved with you day-to-day but understands you. Having someone reality check your thoughts, especially those ones, can be extremely helpful to get a better frame of reference against those toxic thoughts, that are often times not rooted in reality.g

I think this is not the right community for random news

Sounds like you're going through a lot.

First off,what other have told you is the best basic advice. There's nothing you can do and you have to assume she won't change her mind. You also said you are 23 and you feel like you are being childish. That's absolutely not true, if someone broke up at 30 or 40 or 50 or whatever with a long time friend it would be just as rough. This situation is hard, and there's no learning unfortunately and no preparation, it just sucks.

And that is what I would say as well: it's fucked up. It sucks. It's fine to feel betrayed and sad and angry and lonely. It's very fair to feel that way, because you lost something important. It's ok to not feel ok and it's normal to be so moved by something so hard.

Maybe there's something to say for changing your routine a bit. Finding other friends circles that she is not involved in, trying new hobbies and everything. That way you have something new to think about and other people to talk to - this might help with her being around parties every now and again.

Also make sure you take care of yourself, start building up a new routine.

It could be beneficial to talk to her when your feelings towards her are not as strong anymore, but it will always be awkward and there's nothing to expect from it. It will just be a conversation and who knows where it goes.

These are all steps that can help you move on, but of course there is no handbook for breakups so this could look very different for everyone.

Although I haven't been in your situation it sounds really rough and I'm sorry you have to go through this. I'm sure you'll find someone else who loves you and will stick around.

I mean NGL they used to be pretty unbiased for quite a while which was very odd considering they have direct ties to Qatar. I can't speak for their recent coverage though and there's probably something to be said about them falling out of favor.

This

It's literally questioning the conclusion. It's as on point as it can be.

Found the author

It's not that easy.

Turns out there's a statistically significant disposition of people to sweat way more that normal, and for those this doesn't work.

Also, when it's very hot people sweat from all over their body so anti perspirant and deodorant doesn't really work because they would have to apply it on every patch of skin which just doesn't calculate.

Then the OC talking about a different disability which makes this a guessing game.

There's just too many factors. Turns out people are very different.

(Okay)

This does not address the issue of choosing the server though. This only works if the standard option for your server is reliable and rotated per registration.

I love this. Imagine the gnawing of teeth when Putin realizes the smaller country he attacked gets so much recognition from the new pope. He must be livid. I'm so happy about this.

Weird frog dude

Is it normal I still feel bad even though I'm trying to do good and redeem myself?

Yes it is. People hold on to regrets for a whole host of reasons. Some more understandable than others.

But being good is not a value. It doesn't stay up or down and it doesn't get "remedied" in the traditional way. The amount of caring for others you do is awesome.

And yet, not saying no is an extremely unhealthy habit. Everyone has boundaries, and other people don't realize how things drain your energy if you don't say no. If you're not looking out for yourself, who is?

The things in your list, almost all of them are nice in theory, but in practice they can run you into the ground.

• battling your instincts and personality
• feeling very guilty about every little mistake
• doing odd jobs no matter the person or task or how much energy you have
• not saying no

Look at this list. This looks almost self-destructive. It's a testament to you that you are able to survive considering all these habits, but this is way past noble.

Please say no if you feel you need to, never agree if you you really don't want to, only do odd jobs if they are appropriate, extend some grace for all of your mistakes and never suppress your personality. These are selfish things, but you are the only one who can be selfish for you, so look out for yourself.

It's good to reflect on things, but you are beating yourself down for it. That's never appropriate, especially because people like you, who are self aware and want the best for others, are very much needed in this world.

Let's say whatever you did that ended the marriage was bad, and they'd both be together if you didn't do it.

You were 6. Even if you intended this, how the hell is a 6 year old gonna be able to grasp the consequences of their actions. People can do really bad things at any age, but at such a young age, most of the things that happen because of your actions are out of you hands.

Do other people blame you for it? Because that is fucked up. They should know better. You are already reflecting, but blaming literally never helps anyone. And that goes for yourself as well, don't blame yourself, no matter what you did. You can take responsibility and try to repair the damage to the degree you can, but never blame yourself for not doing things that you are unable to do. Do your best, and that's all you can do. Mistakes are par for the course.

Marriages are made of 2 people. You are not part of that marriage, even if you are part of the family. If your sole actions managed to split the marriage, that suggests so much else was going wrong. Did they trust each other enough? Why were they not able to handle whatever their child did? How come they didn't make up again after whatever you did, or they didn't at least try? See how many avenues those two have to fix it? But they didn't. That's not on anyone else, but them. A working marriage extends a truckload of trust, grace, and love to each other, and I suspect, even if your actions rocked the boat, that boat was a nut shell with fish sized holes in it. There's no other way your actions could lead to this. Your actions might have been the match, but look at the barrels of gasoline that fueled the fire. At that point, there's so many things that can destroy the marriage, because the marriage was very shakey in the first place.

Trying to think of the worst things you could have done to lead your parents to part, there's nothing a 6 year can do that makes them responsible for it. Please don't beat yourself down - the amount of self reflection you do leads me to think you are an awesome human being and people around you should be grateful for how much you care for them.

TL;DR There's no way in hell you were or are responsible for what happened to your parents marriage, no matter what you did.

Aww they're growing up to be a gold digger

I'm confused. Who is "they"? Who is addressing whom in the quote?