fishos @ fishos @lemmy.world

Posts

0

Comments

697

Joined

2 yr. ago

Since no one seems to know they exist, a cheap food processor grates cheese and slices/dices vegetables perfectly for most dishes and sits right on your countertop. Saves so much time and prep work.

Maybe check the timestamps and see that they replied it was a joke long after id had the discussion with star. So no?

Again, this is World. Not Memes. Default assumption is your speaking truthfully. Just because you made a shitty joke doesn't mean I need to humor it either. I'm sorry I'm not content with everything being a joke.

Boo fucking hoo.

So again, if you're trying to prove the doctor did something weird, yes. BUT THAT WOULD BE IN ELONS BEST INTEREST TO PROVE. He'd be freed of obligations to the child, would get his money back, and would destroy the doctor.

But Elon isn't asking.

Y'all keep getting obsessed with "well what if someone falsified something during ELONS IVF?!?". Then he wouldn't be the father and he'd be happy to take it.

Y'all keep forgetting that Elons long term plans are to abandon his children. IVF shenanigans, unless it was like "oh you've never actually had a single child", would FAVOR Elon.

So why is it the OTHER party that wants this? For her, it would only damage her case if they did IVF and it came back negative for paternity. So the only logical thing is, maybe they didn't do IVF at all.

Or if you want to get crazy conspiracy theory: Elon hasn't used his own sperm once. He acquired the DNA of a prominent Nazi(maybe even Hitler? WooOoooOooo) and has been using THAT DNA to impregnate women. She wants the paternity test not to prove he's the father and get child support, but to out this secret fact. Maybe even just asking for the test is a form of blackmail. She can make the "paternity test" threat publicly and no one sees it's really extortion.

There ya go, there's a conspiracy that actually fits what's going on, even if it is insane.

Ummm no. "Nurse, did the patient enter the room alone with an empty sample cup and exit with a full one? Did they sign the form?"

Fucking perv

We literally had to invent /s because sarcasm isn't obvious. Before that, "jk". Before that emoticons. Yeah, I've been around. And we have always had Poes Law. I was there when the ancient magic was written.

Dude didn't add the jk until hours after id commented.

Let me try to rephrase again.... Let's assume it's an IFV pregnancy. There is already a mile long paper trial. Specimens obtained. Medical records. Doctors notes. Nurses and doctors as witnesses. Billing receipts.

The overwhelming evidence is already there that Elon is the father. In order for Elon not to be the father, IVF shenanigans had to occur. But NO ONE is arguing that. NO ONE. And it's not Elon arguing for a paternity test to prove he's not, it's the woman arguing for one to prove he is. None of that makes any sense whatsoever if this was an IVF pregnancy like all of Elons are supposedly.

Which leads me back to my original point that so many seem to have missed: I don't think this was an IVF pregnancy. If it were, so much of this would be cut and dry unless you're suggesting Elon used someone else's semen(which then he'd be happy to ask for a paternity test knowing it'd fail) or the doctor lied(which again, it would be in Elons best interest to WANT the test). It just doesn't make sense that this was IVF. The ONLY plausible scenario I can see where this is IVF is if Elon is trying to claim she slept with someone else at the same time and he's claiming it's not his. But again, if he thought it really wasn't his for that reason, he'd want the paternity test too.

I just don't see a IVF scenario making sense here. The paternity test only makes sense to me if it was a traditional sexual encounter.

My bad, I forgot we were still on Reddit where nothing is serious and everything is a joke.

You've clearly not been on the Internet long if you haven't seen someone spout that exact line of bullshit as absolute truth before.

Maybe save your jokes for your comedy hour instead of thinking every discussion needs your half assed jokes? This isn't the meme community.

Nah, I'm just done with handling ignorance with kid gloves. It's how we got to the state of the US today.

You clearly put forth your unsubstantiated theory that Nessie has active camouflage and it totally explains the murky photos. You took the LACK of evidence and used that as proof of something even more extreme and requiring of even more proof. When asked a very simple question like "well then how would it work with a stationary camera?" suddenly it's "well I was just playing make believe, you need to touch grass!"

Nah, fuck your goal post moving ass.

Oh shut the fuck up. Telling someone to touch grass after spouting your delusion? People like you need to be told to shut up more. We shouldn't entertain your nonsense. Trying to call it a joke after the fact is the only laughable part.

Then that would be a fraud charge against the doctors he paid and would absolutely show he's not the father(which until then he'd be assumed to be the father and there'd be no debate). So why does SHE want it and not him?

People are missing my point tho. I'm not talking about the paternity specifically. I'm more intrigued by the possibility that this WASNT another IVF baby because otherwise why care about paternity so much when the default assumption is that if Elon paid for IVF it's obviously his. You don't need a paternity test, just a single receipt.

Really, the only use for a paternity test when IVF is done is to prove that it's not yours when it was supposed to be.

Lmao what you're suggesting is IVF fraud committed by the doctor. Are you seriously suggesting that "well maybe Elon brought someone else's sperm?" No. They signed contracts, did tests, were both very involved in the IVF process. There would be no question about paternity unless you were claiming doctor shenanigans or Elon slipping someone else's sperm in. That's NOT what's happening here.

And "courts recognize paternity tests" is blatantly false. Once a guy's name is on the birth certificate, even a negative paternity test won't get him removed in most states. Reason being that the gov doesnt need more wards of the state and if there's already someone attached, well fuck facts, it saves us money.

Then why paternity test? If this is IVF no need.

Others have posted earlier tweets of hers that are basically "if a woman can get an abortion and it's only her choice, then a man can also opt out of a child and not support it". Literally leopard face eating.

And it's also been speculated that Elon doesn't conceive naturally, only IVF. So why the need for a paternity test? I think if they did have traditional intercourse that actually is in itself an interesting fact considering the other children. What it means I have no clue, but it's an outlier.

No, it's delusional. Writing fictional stories is fine. Trying to warp reality and evidence to fit your fantasy is delusion. "This would be cool..." is not the same as being told why you're scientifically wrong and then going "but what if it were true anyways because I want to believe?"

It's the same shit with Bigfoot. As more and more "evidence" is debunked and the case becomes more obviously just a mistaken identification at best you get these whack jobs talking about how Bigfoot is a dimension jumping shape shifter. Not because they have any actual evidence, but because "this is the only way to explain why we got zero pictures despite decades of trying".

Imagination is fine. Delusion is not.

Yeah, but when it's clearly a hoax and you have someone going "yeah, but still, what if it's really X?" it makes it really clear how badly our education and mental health systems failed.

Just wanted to say thanks for posting this :D

And it knew to react to an unmoving camera how? It just perfectly puts out its camouflage cloud every time it passes a camera? You realize that makes zero sense, right?

Some people have noted that it's very likely she doesn't have "4 days to live". It's more likely she's heavily on pain meds and was told "if you don't start dialysis or get a kidney transplant, you will die in 4 days" and in her state misheard it. She's a young healthy person and renal failure doesn't work like that.