America (go figure) has a whole industry for prison electronics, and they're see-through so nothing can be hidden inside. Try to import some of that if you want it today.
Oh please, it's clearly obvious there is nothing heteronormative about hetero people using topping to mean something else. Peoples having a different meaning is not the same as enforcing themselves as the default, it's not even tangentially related.
It doesn’t bother me one bit if people want to use a word to mean something different to them. It changes nothing in my relationships what they do or say.
What I do hate is your complaining about a group of people based on their sexuality. Seems so bitter.
I also started doing this about 2 years ago, and if anything the rate of hair loss is increasing. I suspect it's unrelated to either and more a factor of my genetics and age.
You'll even be able to tie an onion to your belt.