1ostA5tro6yne @ chocosoldier @lemmy.blahaj.zone

Posts

18

Comments

321

Joined

2 yr. ago

hey fam i was raised as a white dude in a still-segregated pocket of the US, i totally understand about culture giving us biases and bigotries and having to recognize and contend with that. deprogramming isn't easy and i respect you for having come this far.

i'd say that the very idea that anyone else has a say in who you are is antithetical to the aims of the queer rights movement because we struggle to live authentically in accordance with who know we are in spite of who and what society tells us we are or must be. i am a trans woman, it is a part of who and what i am and always has been and no amount of 'disagreement' from anyone (including myself, i was in denial for decades) can ever change that. moreover it is a scientific fact that it is important to my mental health that this immutable internal identity is acknowledged and accepted by those around me regardless of whether i put on a satisfactory display of arbitrary gender tropes. i did not wake up one day and decide this for myself, it simply is and i have no choice but to abide what is true, or go back to torturing myself living what i know is a lie.

i don't expect cis people to get my identity. how even could they? but i don't need them to. what i need, again not "i want" but what the facts of human psychology dictate that i need in order to be mentally healthy, is for people to accept that my identity is what it is and go along with it. does it seem ridiculous to me? hell, i seem ridiculous to a lot of people!

i don't get drag's gender either. i don't get grail's. i have thoughts and opinions, who wouldn't? but that's not relevant. whether i get it isn't relevant. what i think or opine about it isn't relevant. the bar isn't getting it, the bar is accept people. the bar is not scrutinizing and making judgment calls about what you think should or shouldn't be a valid gender or pronoun, or worse spinning a narrative where this person doesn't really deserve to have their identity acknowledged.

this whole thing boils down to whether people are willing to respect someone's purported identity even if it seems silly to them, and that's the absolute core of trans rights.

Meanwhile, coming out the other side of your mouth:

You insist on dictating what is a valid thing to want to be called, and and outright proclaim your intent to disrespect anyone outside of that, literally because you don't care enough. While over here justifying yourself by finding reasons they're bad or irrational people, or why you personally don't feel their gender is valid, and ultimately hiding behind your own feelings about your own gender as if it should your shitty bigoted take more palatable. Adding a third option doesn't make you more tolerant when you're still insisting everyone keep their identities in your comfort zone.

the real paradox of tolerance is how quickly "tolerant" people fall back into gender essentialism rhetoric the moment they're presented with anything outside of their comfort zone.

It's very simple, just don't go around willfully misgendering people. if you can't bring yourself to gender someone correctly simply don't refer to him/her/them/It/drag. identity should not be gatekept by anyone for any reason, and i wholeheartedly support this policy.

Those users use neopronouns and apparently for a lot of people it's beyond the limit of their ability to not gatekeep queer people. There was an announcement about it from the admin that was basically "yeah neopronouns are valid, don't misgender anyone period" and several people completely lost their shit and made threads to bitch about it in.

You sound like you've got the right idea and a good handle on things. Neopronouns are generally a very case-by-case thing and not at all common, people who use them generally will (politely and without fuss) let you know, and many neopronoun-users (not all but many) also accept they/them. It's not a thing that comes up a lot, and personally I think people tend to give the concept too much mental bandwidth. The important thing is to be respectful of each individual, if you're not actively being a dickhead you probably don't have too much to worry about on that front.

i don't think they'll be satisfied with anything short of "the words rose up off the screen and physically murdered a person".

it's a reference to a (possibly apocryphal? i'm not very well educated) anecdote about sigmund freud. freud had a hypothesis that basically any phallic object in a dream represents an actual phallus because supposedly basically everything in the human psyche is connected to sex. someone pointed out his fondness of cigars and he replied with the quote, "sometimes a cigar is just a cigar."

I identify as "very, very tired of thinking about genders, especially my own".

yall talk smack but im old enough to remember animorphs transformers, stupid toys are nothing new

i suspect it's people that only watched the movies and were NOT prepared for Tolkien's KJVesque style

THIS. Where is the Transmetropolitan streaming series? The time has never been more right.

there is only the working class and the owning class. those other classes were made up by the owning class, to divide the working class.

Came here to mention this one. I'll be 36 soon and that story still haunts me 20 some odd years after reading it in class. Link for the curious.

It's all too common when anti-phrenology people don't understand phreno101.

https://invidious.nerdvpn.de/watch?v=dU8VPQsTqFU

oh look yet another warmed over "DAE the kids r bad" talking point that i've been hearing literally since i learned language.

yes because having assigned reading material directly and specifically relevant to the subject of the class is exactly the same as registering for a website full of shitposts and propaganda bots. remember when you got all that spam from opening your textbook, and there was an entire chapter calling you out for being a little bitch?

that's the stupidest comparison i've ever heard.

"hey there's this thing called lemmy, check it out some time" <- leading a horse to water

"ok you have to register an account on lemmy, it's part of your grade" <- shoving a hose down the horse's throat and cranking the spigot

requiring my students to create Lemmy accounts

No. Nobody likes registering accounts for random services because an authority figure told them they had to, I feel like if it were me I would do the bare minimum of interacting that I was required to and never look at the service again out of resentment.