calabast @ calabast @lemm.ee

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Orange Man Gogh

Orange Man Gogh

Orange Man Gogh

Orange Man Gogh

I read about you doing all that, so I'm going to claim 25% vicarious accomplishment for those for my weekend. This is solely for internal auditing purposes, of course.

I think they really mean "I just don't want to see black people, but that sounds bad, so let me try to come up with something I think sounds better."

Do you know if you want to keep seeing them? If you do, or if you aren't sure yet, I think you just need more info. They might have experience with a violent ex, and so they're hyper-tuned to worry "what if this person I like suddenly becomes violent." Talking about an ex would definitely be a trigger for a lot of violent people, so it makes sense she was worried about that topic specifically. Anyways, maybe sit them down and say something like:

"Thanks for giving me a little time to process things, so I wouldn't say something I didn't mean. I was surprised when you said you were afraid I might become violent, as I've never been violent with another person, and I don't think my behavior is even very aggressive." (Assuming that's true about you, which I can't really know). "I want to know why you were worried about that possibility, and I don't feel like you gave me a clear answer last time we spoke. That being said, I totally understand this might be a sensitive subject for you, so I don't want to rush you if you're not ready to talk about it. But I like you, and I want to get to know more about you, and it will be hard for me to feel comfortable continuing to see you if I don't know what caused you to say what you did a couple days ago."

Or hey, maybe you aren't the best judge of yourself. Maybe include something in there like "If you feel like I have raised my voice or acted aggressively sometimes, I would really like to know, as I'm not aware of behaving like that. I promise I will be calm and collected if you want to tell me something like that."

I dunno, or maybe ask ChatGPT, it can probably write up something pretty good.

Oh yeah, but in summary, I think you are assuming her intentions were malicious due to your saying she's gaslighting you, when I'm not really 100% sure that's the case yet. I'd give her a chance to explain, but if y'all keep seeing each other, just keep an eye out for any further weirdness.

I mean, I'm definitely voting for Biden, but I hope it saves the country.

I mean, if Trump wins the election, it might literally be our last election. They have a plan to dismantle our government. So no, unfortunately, I think they're arguing in good faith, trying to use this tool the GOP has set up against them to save the country.

Yeah, that's a good point, I've seen a lot of suggestions that seem to go beyond the scope of this terrible terrible ruling. I guess he could order the military to prevent congress and the SC from meeting or doing anything. Then he could just issue executive orders, or declare war on a faction of politicians trying to stage a coup maybe?

Peter: I wouldn't say I've been "missing" it, Bob. 😉

I can't image HR getting a complaint that you aren't making small talk, and saying "That's outrageous! We'll demand his medical records right now!"

HR exists to keep the company from getting sued, and I think there's a lot less risk for them to tell one employee "He doesn't want to talk to you, deal with it." vs demanding medical records for a non-work-role related issue.

In response to a customer support message. https://www.resetera.com/threads/to-anyone-who-is-curious-no-you-cannot-transfer-your-steam-account-via-a-will-you-can-only-take-your-games-to-your-graves.875634/

You said you were out sick for 4 weeks? Do they know why? Maybe you could spin that, say "sorry, I got some scarring in my throat and talking can make it worse, so I really need to only talk about work or I'll be up all night in pain". Or something like that.

Or you could try "sorry, I like working with you, and I know I've talked in the past, but I need to admit that I have Asperger's/autism, and trying to make small talk is very stressful for me, so I hope you're not offended but I feel like I'm going to burn out unless I make some changes like sticking to only work-oriented discussions from now on. Thank you for your understanding."

Bonus points if you type that up and hand it to people, like you can't even tell it to then directly.

I know both my answers are "lie in a way that makes you look abnormal" which you may feel like isn't something you should have to do. Which is true. But you want to minimize them thinking you're judging them, and they KNOW you are able to talk, so the best way I see is to make them think it's a problem you have, not about them.

🤷‍♂️ Good luck!

I vote starvation. I think a big percent of the world will starve, with a few countries holding out. A bit later I think all those people will starve too, with only like 20 billionaires surviving. And then when THEY run out of food a few years later, I dunno, they'll OD on drugs?

HARRY DID YOU PUT YOUR NAME IN THE GOBLET OF FIRE, YOU PIECE OF SHIT!!!

It does sound crazy, but some of their echo chambers have spent YEARS repeating two conflicting messages 1) we need to use violence to "fix" the country and 2) anyone who actually tries to organize any activity is an FBI member trying to arrest people. It's true that a sane person still wouldn't try to go kill politicians by themselves, but it's no surprise to me that some of those members eventually do come to the "I am the only person who can fix this" conclusion.

The tent looks reversed, but I believe all the rest. Crazy stuff.