SolarNialamide @ SolarNialamide @lemm.ee

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2 yr. ago

Same. Being undiagnosed autistic is horrifying in high school. I was chronically depressed and suicidal and everyone avoided me like the plague because I was weird as fuck and had no social skills. I did drop out at 17, then delivered mail for a few years, then after I got diagnosed and put on proper meds went and got my diploma in adult education at 24, which was super chill. Ironically I decided to become a teacher, in part because I want to contribute to making school a little less horrifying to kids like I was. And the 7 years of delay ended up being a huge benefit, because I can stand in front 25 13 year-olds confidently at 28, but I could never have done that at 21.

If a sauna is 110F I'm leaving because that thing is broken

Then he whirled his wang at the dementors. Shot silver stuff at them.

Lmfao

Israel can have a little genocide, as a treat

Ethnic cleansing comes next. It also came previous, but it will come next, too.

I have a disability and I'm a student so I have zero physical or mental energy to have a job next to my almost full time study. I used to just be broke all the time. I found out there's a city government fund for people exactly like me, and it honestly so fucking crazy what that extra 300 euros a month does. It's not just that I can afford necessities and something fun once in a while but it gives so much peace of mind. One of my cats was sick a few months ago and I could just take her to the vet and have her blood work done without having to stress about it.

I've been making my own clothes for more than a decade now and I've dabbled in knitting and crocheting, but I'll admit it's a bit too much for me. I once made a dress where I didn't have quite enough fabric so the skirt ended up too short and thought, oh, I'll just a crotchet a nice 15 cm wide decorative border. Problem was it was a circle skirt so the hem was 4m long. Shit took me 15 damn hours lol. I respect people who have the patience for it or just find it fun but that's not me.

Lmao I'm that person. I'm autistic though and because of that I simply don't notice if acting is good or bad, and I also am very uncritical of the story because I believe everything. Unless it's really egregious of course, but that doesn't happen that often.

I've had that with tons of 'must see classics'. I'll sit there and be like 'I've already seen this a thousand times'. And while I of course appreciate the fact that the reason I've seen it so often is because that movie did it first back then, doesn't mean that it's impactful or interesting to me now.

Yeah me neither. Where I live there really aren't many stray cats, and certainly not around where people live. It's a good thing though because I would definitely keep every cat if they would just walk into my house.

And dammit if it doesn't work every single time. She knows how weak I am

So, I'm not completely ace, but I am 95% and seemingly get more ace every year that goes by. Thing is, there's a difference between sexual impulse and arousal on one hand and attraction to an actual person on the other. I get horny as hell every single month during my ovulation because my uterus is screaming and begging me to make babies, and that's usually when my once or twice a month masturbation happens. But the last time I met an actual real life person I was sexually attracted to was 4 years ago.

I can also find the idea of a person sexually arousing, but still won't find the actual person attractive. I know this from experience, because when I was much younger and didn't know myself as well I did act on the attraction to the idea of a person only to be sorely disappointed when it actually happened and I felt nothing.

This is only my own experience of course, but I hope this helps a bit in understanding it.

Lmao, my name is 4 syllables and whenever I introduce myself it's 50/50 whether I get 'Oh what a pretty name' or 'cool, what can we shorten it to?'

I'm sorry but you're being a child. 'Well, if everyone apparently hates hearing me talk so much, I'll just say nothing at all, just to please everyone even if it kills me inside!' My guy. If multiple people at different points in your life with different relationships all say the same thing to you, it's probably true. I know it's hard to accept but you're not accurately seeing what is happening in these social situations because you have a certain view of yourself and how you behave doesn't match with that so you ignore it.

I speak from experience. I'm autistic, it took a long time for me to learn to communicate properly. I had to be told by multiple people who were close to me at mutlple parts of my life that I was selfish in conversation and only talked about myself. At first I was very offended and indignant and denied it. Those people stopped being friends with me, but years later I realized they were right. Still, when I'm not trying I slip into just talking about myself. It took my brother and his wife saying it to me again 2 years ago. I apologized to them and have started paying attention more, and it makes a world of difference.

Let other people talk, ask them questions, no matter how brilliant or interesting you think you are. You, in your childish indignation, think that being more empathetic in conversation will have a negative impact on you, but the people around you will like you way more and be more willing to talk with you, which actually has a positive impact on you. You know, I have students who are also super offended every time you discipline them because it's sooo unfair and they didn't do anything wrong, but it happens with every single teacher. It's not them, it's you. Try to be open to the fact that sometimes, other people have a more accurate view of your behavior. If they all say the same thing, listen.

Infinity has been subscription only for a month now. Unless you take the code and put in your own api key if you can still get it, you're not using it for free

Lmao I've been an atheist all my life but I do always joke that God hates me in particular because there's no other explanation for my life

That never happens to me because I'm too autistic to be aware of my own facial expressions. I didn't even realize until a friend I made at 20 or 21 told me I could go into theater because I was so expressive with my face. That gave me a bit of a mini existential crisis. My face has been loudly communicating things to everyone all this time without my knowledge or consent? Wtf

A ton of amphetamines and other stimulant research chemicals and a fuckton of alcohol. I think probably the latter is mostly to blame.

Hahaha I did the same with a previous cat. She was so fucking dumb, like borderline actually something wrong with her. I would always say thing like 'who is so dumb? Who is the dumbest little cat on the entire planet? You are! You're a little moron! Yes you are!' in a baby voice to her lol.

I got it for the first time at the beginning of September. I was so pissed, my 2.5 year streak of avoiding it gone. It was pretty brutal too, the fever and muscle soreness was no joke.