I have this problem, but width only, not overall size.
I just wear men’s shoes, and even those are wicked hard to find. There isn’t really a category of shoes for my size (not big enough overall for drag shoes to be right, but far too wide for normally sized women’s shoes - I wear 6-8 [brand dependent] 4EW in men’s) and I’m not willing to spend a fortune on shoes to have cute custom ones made, so men’s shoes and sandals are my options. Boring.
I haven’t had quite that interaction, but I’m equally blasé about it. It’s literally just part of life.
“In the past year have you had thoughts of suicide?”
broad gesture if you haven’t you probably aren’t paying attention… but I’m apathetic, not active. Not that it would matter because when I was actively suicidal it took 6 fucking months to be seen by you chucklefucks…
They always get that concerned face and I have to reassure -them-.. like no it’s fine this is just normal for me..? I live with chronic pain, I live with chronic poor-ness, it’s just chronic life (and not the fun drug kind, even). I’m not into it, but I’m not actively thinking about doing anything about it, either. Doesn’t mean I want to be resuscitated if shit happens, tho.. and I don’t.. (any more chronic issues would be probably one too many, and then I’d get active..) I even know exactly what probably painless method I’d go with, because suffering is dumb. And it’s something I can act on quite literally any time I want with zero effort on my part other than going to the store, so that I’m still here is a great sign!
My current doc (Va changes my doctors every couple years) was the absolute first, out of dozens of people I’ve told that to, who was like “ummm.. that’s actively bad.. so what is your mental health plan? (Told her I don’t have one, other than suck it up) I’m going to give you an open-ended referral to some outside groups who may be more able to help you, especially on short notice.. I get why you don’t trust our mental health.. so if you ever want that, just send me a message and I’ll put in the referral for you. Also here’s a list of non-profits that aren’t directly affiliated who may be better suited to help you..”
Fwiw, whatever it is in your life that causes these things, I hope they stay at or below active-planning level. If you ever want someone totally random to vent to, my DMs are open, and I’ll reply with commiseration rather than gaslighting you about things not being that bad, because.. well I get how pointless that would be 😜
I’ve had a ton of people asking if I’m going to keep bees as part of my homestead, and I have to explain that while somewhat useful, they aren’t native and so I don’t want them. Only way I’d be willing to keep honey bees is if they are completely contained in my greenhouses, and frankly that’s a lot of work I’m not willing to do.
People tend to get confused until I tell them about the dozens of native bees and other pollinators that are struggling to maintain populations in the region.. I want to encourage those to hang out by my crops. They need a lot less from me, and are significantly more useful because they belong there.
I’m like this with soy. It tastes fancy. It’s the only milk I get when I get a coffee from somewhere. It’s not the same making my own tho so I use whole milk for that.
In fairness, a massive proportion of people didn’t vote at all, so we really only need to convince them to join a movement. Fuck trump supporters, they can change their minds if they want to, but we don’t need them to if they don’t want to.
I got 5 dermal anchors back when I was 18. They have been nothing but problems. I’m down to 3, 2 having been ripped out this past year.. I’ll let the other three reject whenever they decide to do so (I’ve been preventing rejection for almost 20 years and I’m tired of it). I’d have to pay to get them removed, which I’m not doing.
The trick I’ve found over years of people-Ing as the person working is to always end with a statement that can either be turned back with ”you too!” without being awkward, or warrants something other than an autopilot response.
Thanks for stopping in, have a great night
Enjoy your meal and if you need anything just let me/us know
Don’t forget to tell your friends about us, and have a great day
Etc.
That way it’s totally fine for them to autopilot the pleasantries and they won’t feel cringey after.
I reuse passwords quite intentionally. It reduces memory use.
Does the account have any saved personal info (other than email)? No? Continue.
Was the account used for credit card info? No? Continue.
Do I care about the account in some way? No, plus no to all of the above? Don’t care, use an easy to remember password and don’t bother saving it to my overly bloated password manager.
It absolutely causes problems with some cloudflare sites because that email/password combo was compromised decades back, but I usually have no intention of accessing the account again when I use it so I don’t actually care. It’s their problem at that point, and I never use legit info for any of it anyway (I have a spam email I use for these things, never with my own name or info, because they don’t fucking need it)
Definitely mine too. It doesn’t even run faster than 1x.. which is sucky slow but my own fault for having too many livestock animals to support my ~60 pawns… (peaceful gets very out of control if you let it) but now I have an outpost mod and as soon as all my kids are adults, most of them are gone.
Sure, most people won’t downvote or harass you just for being a woman (a lot will.. we didn’t get the best of Reddit at all, and I doubt the new adoptees are any better…) but they will often enough make things difficult even if they aren’t actively causing problems.
But men of Lemmy (aka the vast majority of the user base since they ran off all the womenfolk) don’t care. They see that as quality control or some dumb shit, because THEY aren’t interested in woman things, so nobody should be, or they think their “as a man” comments should be important or some shit... Whatever the post is about. If it doesn’t cater to them, it can fuck right off.
Which is why cis women make up <10% of the Lemmy side of the fediverse. It’s a disaster for women here.
But I wonder how long you’ve been here. Most of the posts of this nature are from very new accounts and they don’t know the problems yet…
Easily the rest of your life!