Reyali @ Reyali @lemm.ee

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2

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317

Joined

2 yr. ago

(Not who responded to you, but) I agree with you when you put it as “the worst of human nature.” I take issue with the idea that all of human nature is trash.

The systems we live in absolutely bring out the worst in people because it drives desperation. Desperate people will do what they must no matter how they hurt people, and the whole “hurt people hurt people” then runs rampant.

But human nature also contains the helpers, community, love, and so much more. We need systems that encourage those things, not to write off all our problems as just how we are.

Or “the rest of,” as if insurance companies aren’t the primary driver of those flaws.

Requesting one small caveat to your thinking: your friends with chronic health issues (physical and/or mental) may bail more often than others but still love you.

My partner has lost friends over them thinking he uses his migraines as an excuse to not show up to things. They feel hurt because he bailed one too many times for them, and he feels hurt because they diminished his disability and didn’t believe him. It’s hard to see the additional toll it takes on him.

(I also have my own chronic issues but thankfully have been able to suck it up often enough to not have it come in the way of friendships. Sometimes he and I are intentional about making sure at least one of us attends something even if we both feel like shit in order to not alienate people we care about.)

I appreciate you breaking it down this way. It helps me understand the stance so many hold on landlords.

However, I think you’re missing a lot in your distillation that everything above mortgage + handyman salary is making money for nothing.

Owner also pays property taxes, insurance, all maintenance costs, all upgrades, and possibly utilities or yard care. The benefits for the renters include having a maintenance person on-call all the time, not needing to vet each tradesperson, not needing to get quotes, no expenses when an appliance breaks, no liability in case of a disaster, and more.

If I didn’t have a handy partner and the market was reasonable, I’d love to rent. I don’t want to deal with maintenance and I like having a consistent monthly fee rather than suddenly having to spend $2k on a new water heater like I did last month, or being afraid that our heat might die suddenly this winter because we weren’t ready to spend >$20k this summer to replace the air handler when it went out and needed a new part. Plus my partner took 3 half days off work to get 3 quotes for it. They each told us significantly different things that we needed to do, so we couldn’t decide if we were comfortable doing business with any of them. That shit is stressful! Having the assurance that I can call just one person and someone else will take care of it is worth a good price.

So the cost of owning some units is more than just the mortgage, and the benefits of renting are more than just a maintenance person’s salary. Distilling it to just those two things is an unjust comparison.

Should a person get stupidly rich off of being a landlord? No. That’s exploitative. The cost of renting should match the cost of the property and maintenance (as averaged out over time) plus the cost/savings of the additional benefits of renting. That’s all. But that’s a lot more than just mortgage + handyman salary divided out over however many units the landlord owns.

(Also this assumes the person is actually a good landlord, and we know there are many landlords out there who aren’t.)

This cirrus-forming phenomenon could account for around 35% of aviation’s total contribution to climate change—or about 1% to 2% of overall global warming, according to some estimates.

I had absolutely no clue that they had an impact, much less such a significant one. Thanks for sharing!

Also interesting:

A small fraction of overall flights, between 2% and 10%, create about 80% of the contrails

Ah, actually that seems likely! I’ve only ever seen bright red mouths on baby crows, so this being pink was a bit of a surprise, but it seems pink is normal for fledgling ravens. The feathers extending onto the beak also do indicate it’s more likely a raven.

Thanks for the call out!

Fun fact: that’s a baby crow! [Edit: or more likely, a baby raven.]

Only young crows have pink/red inside their mouths. Adults have black mouths. I learned this after we started feeding crows at our house and in the summer I noticed some had bright mouths. It’s the only distinguishing feature because by the time the babies are out of the nest, they’re as big as the adults!

Though the way they followed the adults around and begged to be fed also distinguished them a bit!

If you expect the average person to be able to understand an algebraic equation better than the existing system, then I’d suggest you get out of your social bubble and meet more ‘average’ people.

This is exactly what I thought about increasing this! I asked my bf what bug it was because I couldn’t remember for sure. If only I’d kept scrolling before asking, lol.

In my job as a Product Manager, I make specialized software for internal users in my company. Watching people use it can be so painful.

An example: Look at dashboard view > memorize client name > go to client view > type in client name to search > click to view the client

When they could have just clicked to view the client from the dashboard.

After I finish cringing, I just take it as learnings for how to build/design better in the future.

I had someone send me bullet points in Teams… except they weren’t bullet points or even carriage returns. It was just 50+ spaces at the end of the line to make the text go down to the next line in her view.

She was also a right-click copy/paster.

Ctrl+shift and L/R arrow keys also selects entire words, and up/down selects entire rows. No more taking your hands off the keyboard to select text!

My favorite that I can’t believe not everyone uses is ctrl+backspace to delete a whole word at once. Totally butchered typing something? Start over quickly. Need to delete most of your sentence? Delete it in just a few taps.

Small note: the country name is spelled “Colombia,” and spelling it correctly means you don’t need to specify which one!

But that’s just a ‘bone apple tea’ of “chest of drawers”? It’s not a correct term.

(I figured surely there’s an actual word for misheard terms being butchered in writing, but a quick search failed me so I went with the colloquial name.)

OP is wrong. Bra size is the ONLY women’s sizing that is related to specific measurements. It can still take a while to find a comfortable fit based on shapes, but the sizes are standardized across good brands.

Starting point to find the size: Measure the rib cage right under the bust. If even, that’s the number; if odd, round up. Measure the largest size around the bust. Subtract underbust from bust measurements. 1” = A, 2” = B, 3=C, 4=D.

It gets confusing from there in the US because instead of going alphabetically, the US just adds a D for every inch after 4 until some arbitrary letter then goes back to the alphabet. Using UK sizes just follows the alphabet and so is very simple.

You’re close! Both a 34B and a 32D would have the same measurement around their bust, but the bust size alone can’t be used to determine bra size. The rule is to increase band size by 1 increment (which is 2”) and reduce cup size by 1 increment (the letter) to maintain the same volume.

The volume of a 32D is the same as a 34C.

It’s been the opposite for women’s clothing in my experience. I’ve had to give up multiple brands as their shirts got too big. Same labeled size, same style, but it’s suddenly 2” wider.

Agree on all points! When I was had my first grownup job I was trying to build up my wardrobe and found a pair of jeans that fit and felt great. Size 3. I went back after another paycheck to get an identical third pair and when I got home, they were practically falling off of me. I had to exchange them for a 1, which was still larger than the size 3s from just a month or two earlier.

But a fitted bra? One of my best purchases ever. Getting in the right size resolved about 70% of my chronic back pain. Fit is different between bra types but decent brands’ sizes are standardized, regardless what OP says.

What age do you start remembering what you were like?

I became really self-aware at 11. I’m guessing a bit about being 10, but 6th grade (11-12) is when I feel like I started being the person I still am 20+ years later. Obviously I’ve grown, but it started then.

Probably that I’m alive?

I already dealt with (undiagnosed) chronic depression by 10. The first time I thought about killing myself I don’t think I even knew the word “suicide.” I also had an overwhelming sense that I wouldn’t live past 30. That might not have started until I was 11 or 12, but I think it was there when I was younger.

Weirdly my mom also had an overwhelming sense that she would lose me at a young age from the day I was born, which she didn’t have with my older sister.

Well, I’m past 30 now. My love of people in my life has kept the suicidal ideation to only that. While I still have chronic depression, I’ve learned to manage it better over the years and medication helps.

I genuinely don’t know why I was depressed or had suicidal thoughts that young. I didn’t have a traumatic home or childhood. My parents worked a lot but loved me and my sister without question. We didn’t have a lot of money but always had enough food. I loved school and had great teachers. I wasn’t sexually assaulted before I was 10 (I think I was 12 the first time). I don’t know and that bothers me.

ETA: I guess I was bullied at school by 10, so maybe that accounts for it?