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2 yr. ago

  • I think our lizard brain jumps to the fore and want to be like: "unga-bunga - problem! Me can fix with solution! It make tears stop!" when in reality, like you said, kids want someone they trust to give them permission to do the thing they know they need to do. They need to know they can come to you and be open and safe and loved.

  • So I tried to share the contents of a The Atlantic article that's incredibly relevant, and as someone who has spent 30 years working for a center for neglected children, it hit real close to home. Unfortunately, the article was too long to post, and I don't know how to bypass the paywall. Maybe someone here can?

    https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2018/07/the-dangers-of-distracted-parenting/561752/

    The bottom line is that we need to be present for our kids. If we're staring at our black mirrors and not emotionally engaging with them they're going to feel devalued.

  • I'm going to reply to OP directly, but your point on really listening is huge. My SO shared an article that, while I don't have access to share it, I'm gonna copypaste it to OP because I think every parent needs to read it. Thank you for bringing it up!

  • OP, thank you for asking this question. I'm in a remarkably similar boat; my SO had an absent father and I want to be the best dad to my new little girl (just a bit over 3 weeks) that I can be. Like you, I want to make sure my daughter has the opportunity to grow up strong, confident, kind, compassionate, and independent. I look forward to reading all the replies. :)

  • "Moms" for liberty was founded in part by a dude in New Jersey that was up on charges for sexual assault, and another founder in Florida, a couple, the husband of which was credibly charged (and I believe pled out) to criminal sexual conduct...

    That organization? The same one that the Southern Poverty Law Center has designated as a hate group? Let me see how many fucks I can find to give about what they have to say...

  • Regarding the second picture...

    1. I gauran-damn-tee that every last pharmaceutical in those kits has been expired at least 7 years, and
    2. the "made with military grade" shelf-stable meals (they're not military MRE's) - means they were made as cheaply as legally possible to still be called "food".

    Peppers are a strange lot. My kid's ex's dad kept 2,000lbs of dry beans in his house 'just in case.' Didn't have a functioning furnace, hot water heater, or stove - but made sure to check on his bean inventory every week.

  • The absolute worst, most annoying thing about every Apple advert and the day-long adverts - the launch day events, is the freaking hyperbole.

    (breathlessly exclaim:) The fastest ever. The thinnest ever. More cameras than ever! The most ever ever!

    Breathtaking vividly bright Applewordsalad display technology

    My coworker is fully bought in to the ecosystem, so I get the full experience every launch day. Listen critically sometime. Turn on your bullshit filter. It's a fun game.

  • No, you're right, the US sucks in a large way, in many, many areas. What we're all a bit put off by, and maybe it's the time zone difference, or a cultural communication difference, is that we're having g a discussion, receive information that doesn't fit the pattern of our experiences. For example, and I'm not quoting your words, just how I received them: everyone I know leases, oh, and the company pays it, oh, and this is in Germany. This Information wasn't presented initially, and I suppose it is on us and our assumptions, but the reader had to sus it out over several threads and we are lambasted as insipid when we're not in possession of all the relevant data.

    As stated, perhaps that is our fault. Maybe when first presented with an outlier claim, we should ask: "oh, wow - that's amazing - what country do you live in?" and that would promote a more upbeat dialog.

    Anyway, guten tag

  • Have you seen a car lately? Whist I'm sure it could be taken out (leaving a raggedy, jagged, odd-shaped hole in the dash...) you'd lose half the functionality of the car with it. These aren't the single or even 1.5 DIN chassis of yesteryear, and I doubt Crutchfield has a conversion kit that's going to replace the dash elements, backup camera, steering wheel controls, climate control, vehicle information center, and, for some bizzarro-world reason, the instrument cluster setup options.

    I really can't stand the modern "everything's gotta have a big-ass tablet interface with no tactile landmarks. Particularly when I'm hurtling down a narrow corridor in a 1.5 ton metal box and trying to avoid hundreds of other idiots doing the same.

    Bring back buttons!