I’ve already left any asexual spaces because of how uncomfortably sexual they’d become, and how no one could share an experience of not being sexual without constant reminders of how sex is pretty awesome actually.
A safe space isn’t exactly safe when you’re only kept around to be kicked down.
The lack of sexual desire can be just as hard or harder to learn about yourself than sexual preference.
We grow up in a world that assumes people will want sex. And anyone who doesn’t is either traumatized and needs help or just hasn’t found the right person yet.
Learning that there are other people who never develop that desire feels so good. It lets you feel, for once, that you’re not broken for not having that. There’s nothing wrong, some people are just like that!
The word for that was asexual.
But lately, asexual has been changed to mean something completely different. It’s still a form of sexual cravings, just in the flavor of microlabels to describe what gives you sexual feelings.
And places where the first group once could connect and joke and vent with each other over experiences of not having sexual desire, now you can’t say anything of the sort without a barrage of people saying “asexuals like sex, too!”
And if you just wanted a safe space to chill with people who share your experience… well, you see it in this thread. You get called a gatekeeping asshole.
So we get forced out of once safe spaces. For wanting a safe space with people we share commonality with. For wanting a simple way to say “Hey, this is how I am, and I’m not broken”.
And with more people identifying as asexual while seeking a sexual relationship, it’s even harder than ever to NOT feel broken. There’s no word for people who just don’t want sex. No word but broken, or “gatekeeping assholes”.
And we’re back to square one.
“That’s not normal, you need therapy!”
“You just haven’t found the right person yet!”
“I bet I can fix you!”
“But you’d have sex for ME, right?”
“You’re just a late bloomer!”
And that hurts.
To add a touch of humor to a depressing situation: Why yes, my asshole is gatekept. I don’t want anal sex, either!
Edit to add: It’s not to say others don’t exist or are invalid. They do exist and are valid! It’s about others saying we’re assholes for wanting a safe space to not understand sexual desire together.
Isn’t there something about insurrectionists not being allowed to be president?
We’re about to allow an insurrectionist to be president.
Pretty sure no silly little written amendment on a piece of parchment will stop him. They sure haven’t before. Those rules only apply when HE wants them to.
First is the obvious saying that there’s nothing stopping him from running for a 3rd term, and once again using Jim Crow era vote suppression and other slimy tricks to win again.
The second option is to just declare that presidency is a for-life position. He can do that, after all.
And he’s making that last part perfectly clear. He is above the law. There are no consequences for him breaking the law, and nothing stopping him from doing whatever he wants. The people who could are so polite that if words won’t stop him, they say more words at him. That’ll do it!
So much this. Why does every darn movie need some romantic subplot? This crap is everywhere. It’s like heterosexuals can’t imagine a goid story being possible without cramming some random love couple in. Why?? Why was random romance needed?
A disproportionate number of songs that are total bangers otherwise are also all the same topics on repeat. Soulmate love song, upset breakup love song. Do they not know there’s more things they could sing about?
Could be the thing going on with the first trans woman in… congress? I think? And some right wing lady also in congress(?) calling for a bill or something forcing trans people to use their birth sex bathroom in the house.
… I am new to political crap I probably have a bunch of terms and stuff mixed up but basically first trans woman US government official is being bullied by Republican woman government official that “mEn sHouLdnT bE iN wOmaNs BatHroOms!”
For even more fun: agree. Then elaborate. Lean right on into the insult, flip it into a good thing, or a ‘oh thanks for pointing that out, I’ll reflect on that’ depending on the tupe of insult.
It’s amazing how MAD trolls get when you remain calm and treat ad homenim as either a compliment or means to self-reflect.
Watching them try more and more insults, getting angrier and angrier, until they just give up. It brings me joy!
Netflix is an interesting comparison.
Old Netflix where it was an affordable deal for a lot of entertainment?
Or the more expensive modern Netflix that I cancelled because they created payment tiers where you pay to be advertised to?