I have not had a friend irl in like 7 years and on top of that a lot of trauma that has made it very difficult to trust people now. In 2020 some bad stuff happened to me at like right at the start of the year just before the pandemic really took off. I just... shut down, pandemic and trauma and everything I just couldn't cope other than withdrawing from everything.
Thats been going on for 3 years now, pretty much live like a hermit now even though I am in the middle of a big city, like hikikomori levels of hermit. No family nearby. I just never leave my apartment anymore, get everything delivered. I can "technically" leave, I am able to go to things like a rare dr appointment or something like that. But I get near panicky if I am out too long, I have thrown up several occasions trying. It's actually been a few years now since I even talked to any one irl except for people in like service roles like shopkeepers or receptionists, things like that. I actually don't know how to unhermit myself at this point. I feel trapped.
If you read this and think of commenting some shit about how I just need to put myself out there please fuck off, it's not that simple.
I think the reason is just absolute fuckloads of highres assets like textures, audio, lightmaps, shit like that. Blame the neverending race for better looking games.
Mastodon is great, I like it way more than lemmy. TBH its the only federated social I think is actually doing really well, way more users but still a small town vibe. People posting art or pics of their gardens or linux posts. Better moderation overall. It's very gay and I love it.
pretty sure mastodon is like 99% gay cat girls posting long-winded info dumps about niche tech stacks... i have no idea where that person is getting their info..
I started on beehaw and then moved to blahaj.zone and have been using it since... i appreciate what beehaw are trying to do but the server and their leadership feels a little like they are sniffing their own farts, and I didn't like that my feed there seemed a lot more sparse than the one I see on blahaj.zone. I am still feeling it out tho.
Noooooooo lemmy stoppp ... dont start posting ad's masquerading as memes you cant start doing this. I left reddit to get away from the ad's masquerading as memes.
Gnome Kat @ GnomeKat @lemmy.blahaj.zone Posts 2Comments 271Joined 2 yr. ago
i hate linkedin so much