Having been in a situation in which management could not quite grasp the concept of "what you're asking is literally impossible" the only answer I have to give is to leave and find someplace smarter to work.
They'd have to declare peace first. They've got an armistice but the war is still technically active. Anyway they should focus on how many of their people are going to die in the near future when they find out how much experience the Ukrainian military has which they do not.
Ah yes, the science publishing problem. It's even worse than this, since it encourages publication quantity over quality, which leads to an alarming amount of junk science masquerading as facts.
Based on my experience with Assyrian Americans, this is accurate. Their pride is completely disproportional to their ancient civilization's modern cultural influence.
One medal for each time he kissed deer leader's ass.