I don't give. I donate to organizations that give, but I don't give direct. I'm not particularly trusting that it's going to the right place. I'm not interested in buying you a beer, and I don't believe the train ticket story, because I've heard it a million times.
My wife works with the homeless. She gets them housed. My wife found a dude who shed gotten housed out busking telling people he was homeless. It's happened more than once.
If you're going to give to a person, give to an organization.
Yeah, this thread and many others shines a light on a lot of folks who are (and maybe with good reason) very bitter. My folks weren't perfect, but I understand life is a difficult thing and there is no manual. My mom at times will apologize to my brother and I for not doing well at times, but from my point of view she's got two good sons who are well positioned in life, and that's about all you can ask for.
And as many others have said in this thread, becoming a parent shines the light on you. And not that one has no right to judge as the child in the relationship, I think having the perspective of the parent can be difficult. I constantly try to remind myself how I felt at my child's age, and sometimes it leads to a battle within to do what's right, because "what's right" isn't always this crystal clear thing.
Kids are difficult. Life is difficult. We're all just trying to plod our way through. Nobody here is a billionaire, many of us need to balance working and our family, and the lack of sanity both bring. I try to give everyone the benefit of the doubt, but also guide in such a way that I'm not doing them a disservice later.
Ha, same. I'm 37 and had my reckoning a bit. I was a bean pole kid, though I worked at it, swaam competitively, played sports my whole life, did the military thing. Got my own kids now, and COVID was peak lazy for me, and took me some time to get out of. Getting back on the exercise thing was tough, and the pounds did come on in the interim. Nothing crazy, but definitely noticeable for me.
Curious why you say that. I used to do the slog to lower Manhattan every day, 90 minutes by train, and another 10 or 20 minute walk, depending where I was going. I'd get back in the train later in the day knowing I should open the laptop up and work, but just couldn't do it.
Now, in fairness, if I was driving 90-120m, I'd kill myself. But at least I'd do so listening to the Wheel of Time audiobook.
And extra fairness, my job went remote after COVID (for the majority of it). Public meetings have returned to in person sadly, but my day work is 90% remote. And on those rare occasions I get dragged out of my home wearing a suit, I do so belligerently. I'm done showing up 20-30m early, I get there when I get there. And I gotta leave early now too. I have really just started to not give a fuck, which is not great as an independent contractor.
I'm sitting here reading every comment to find this, so glad you said it. This is the way, OP. If you focus too hard on this global view that we've been gifted (cursed with), you're going to get wrapped up in the negativity. Focus local. Attend local meetings. See what's happening around you. Join the environmental commission. Plant trees. Donate time or money or both to a local YMCA.
One of my most rewarding experiences was riding on a rescue squad. Having two kids put it on the back burner, but doing a 12-hour shift once a week left me feeling fulfilled, and sometimes very tired, and helped to bring my focus to problems I am more capable of dealing with.
Now, it's kids. Soon enough, it'll be something else. I have decided that it won't be saving the world, though.
Yeah, you just got a throw your hands up and say yeah, I realize someone's pulling the strings, it's just that there's so many possible "someones" that I can't begin to imagine who it actually is. Which is also by design.
Yeah, or maybe "rest of the time" is literally when you're sleeping, because you spent 16 hours searching for berries, with maybe an hour or two nap when the sun was high. Life was certainly not easier a few hundred years ago, whether you lived in some community or were nomadic or whatever. Wherever it was, it was work, and it's work now, except where my work used to benefit me and my family and perhaps my community, now it buys some dude a yacht, and a private jet, and some wineries in Napa Valley. But I get to watch Netflix, so it's a fair trade.
You're judging them based off of what is ostensibly a first impression they have chosen for themselves. I can't imagine a scenario where that's not fair. And you don't need to form an entire opinion, but the opinion starts there. If their picture was a sports team I didn't like, some furry shit, or even MAGA, I'd form some opinions out of the gate.
In this (dubstep) vein, I never miss an opportunity to rep one of my favorites from back in the 2010-2015 dubstep days: Stinkahbell - Don't Tell Mum About Ibiza.
Right. I can't ride my gun to work or the grocery store. I get that there's a lot of negatives associated with car culture, but it's a tool in a way that firearms are not.
I don't give. I donate to organizations that give, but I don't give direct. I'm not particularly trusting that it's going to the right place. I'm not interested in buying you a beer, and I don't believe the train ticket story, because I've heard it a million times.
My wife works with the homeless. She gets them housed. My wife found a dude who shed gotten housed out busking telling people he was homeless. It's happened more than once.
If you're going to give to a person, give to an organization.