ChickenLadyLovesLife @ ChickenLadyLovesLife @lemmy.world

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2 yr. ago

I had a 25-year career as a programmer. Not once did I ever have a company I worked for verify my academic or employment histories or even contact my references. I could have put down anything I wanted and it wouldn't have made the slightest difference - my continuing employment was based on my ability to actually do shit.

I'm now a school bus driver and they checked out everything. And of course threw in drug testing and a criminal background check for good measure.

I remember once borrowing a friend's MBA textbook to see what it was all about. I opened to a random page which turned out to be in a chapter on negotiating strategies. There was an offset bit of text that read "your skill at negotiating will affect the outcome of the negotiations."

My college had a professor of communications with a degree from a supposedly ancient (like, 13th century) Italian university. He only got exposed because we had a big ceremony for the newly-hired President of the college, with a procession that featured faculty and alumni walking in an order determined by the age of the oldest institution they were associated with. One of our alumni was a very famous author who was on the faculty at Harvard, and he was like "why am I not the first in line?" He looked up this comm prof's "university" which turned out to be basically a prep school that wasn't even close to being 700 years old. Comm prof was promptly fired, which was kind of a shame because he was actually a really good teacher.

believing they have a degree is useful for telling clients who specifically sometimes ask about the degrees of the people they’ll be working with

I used to work for a company that provided programming consultants for the US military and for defense contractors. The hourly rate we could be billed out at was entirely dependent on highest degree attained, so PhDs could be billed out at the highest rate, followed by Masters, then Bachelors of Science and then Bachelors of Art. It didn't even matter what field your PhD was in, so my company was chock-full of useless people with advanced degrees who got put onto every project and told to just stay home. The worst thing was when they insisted on showing up and doing something.

I (M) saw Sinead O'Connor in the early '90s and almost the entire audience was 13-year-old girls dressed in black who screamed every time Sinead made a weird hand gesture. Still probably the best concert I've ever been to - Sinead was a fantastic real singer and her band was tight. RIP and fuck Joe Pesci.

It was last year! I found out they were playing in my area ... the day after they played. I haven't been to a concert in 18 years but I would have gone to that one.

At the start of every summer, I rediscover grape soda and I'm like "holy shit this stuff is great". And then about 7 cans into the case I remember why I stopped drinking it. It's kind of funny that it's only ever available in the store brand, never in a "real" brand.

I went to grad school in the '90s and one of our friends used to show up to our house parties with her infant in tow and get blackout drunk and pass out, and we would have to collectively take care of the baby. Weird to think that kid is in his 30s by now, if he's even still alive. The double whammy of fetal alcohol syndrome and growing up in Florida would be hard to overcome.

We’re on our front foot

He's on his ass ... which is remarkable since he's talking out of it at the same time.

Stab Persians with really long sticks

It translates to "you have Play-Doh on your forehead".

I haven't really eaten fast food in years, but a few months ago I was sort of forced to get lunch at a Burger King because it was the only place around. It (a Whopper and onion rings) was actually pretty tasty, a lot better than what I was expecting. But I just felt so physically bad after eating it, like I just wanted to lay down somewhere and die. Maybe it was all the salt, I dunno. When you combine this with the insane prices, it's a just a mystery why anyone would eat this shit regularly.

It is so demoralizing to try and explain civil asset forfeiture. I've never had a single person believe that it's real when I tell them about it - everybody insists that it can't possibly be true since it's so flagrantly unconstitutional.

Lol check out modern bikes with electric shifters.

Or that you wouldn't last a year without your statin.

I know some very smart people from Iowa. They left.

I don't remember that Converse tagline ... but back then I was wearing Sears Toughskins instead of Levis, that should make it clear how fashionable I was. "Limousines for the Feet" is a pretty laughable slogan, though, since chucks are about the least comfortable shoes in the history of humanity - even Ötzi's fucking bird's nest shoes were probably more comfortable.

It's Germany - wouldn't it be "das tired"?

I just realized the irony of Zion Williamson playing basketball for the New Orleans Pelicans.