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2 yr. ago

  • working in psychiatry for as long as I've had, the people I admire most are actually the ones who are just decent every single day. the ones who know everybody's kids names and remember everybody's birthday. I don't know how they do it. I became the person who helps pull apart people trying to bite each other's faces off because idk how to remember birthdays and I was hoping it would be something people appreciate but day to day it actually really isn't and the reason why becomes obvious pretty quickly. the people who make the biggest difference in people's mental health are people who know how to plan a good Friday night get-together and how to follow up when they haven't heard from one of the invitees for two weeks in a row.

  • the only mental health thing I'm aware of being publicly available is commitments, and in most localities that requires an initial involuntary hold followed by evaluation and a hearing. and even that I think only counts for clearances, gun rights, and possibly licenses concerning public safety such as doctors, social workers, etc. rando employers should not be able to access that info afaik (this is a summary of the relevant part of the speech I give to patients when they ask if they want to change their status to involuntary and what the process looks like if the doctor disagrees that they need care, what their rights are in that situation, etc.). even with that idk that they can see what you were committed for just that you were. I'm not sure how hard they'd have to dig to get access to the mental health board evaluation that led to the commitment. I talked my way out of a commitment after an involuntary hold and have had a few incidents since where I even talked myself out of the hold to begin with and it never even affected me getting licensed (fellow cluster b PD here, hiiiii).

  • I have borderline personality and premenstrual dysphoric disorder. I was so unmanageable as a teenager (and twice a month since my cycle was coming every two weeks) that my fundie parents put me on birth control at 14 years old.

  • also helps to plan difficult conversations if it's something that can wait a few days or that could wait a week but you know you need to do it sooner rather than at the end of the week when she won't be able to respond as charitably. me and my husband keep track of each other's hypomanias and depressions for similar reasons.

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  • I think we should make all work legal for the worker. They can be here, they can receive wages, their kids go to school. as As long as they don't commit any crimes just let them exist, whatever.

    ...but hiring someone without a visa should be extremely illegal. Like decades in prison illegal. Should fix the rampant human trafficking pretty quickly. A lot of these employers do it because they don't have to worry about treating the workers fairly. They should be terrified of illegal workers telling on them. And after they're done telling on one human trafficker let them go find another job and tell on him too. If we were tossing people in prison for hiring illegal immigrants their job market would dry up immediately and the problem would resolve very quickly.

    people need to think more about who is actually benefiting from illegal immigration and go after those people. because it's not some lower than minimum wage laborer, it's his employer who found someone who's too scared to tell OSHA that the sharps bin is overflowing and APS that meemaw has been sitting in her own shit for three days. Immigrants aren't taking my job, sketchy employers are trafficking human beings in who are willing to be paid less while being abused and who will be too scared to say anything about the really scary shit they're being made to do and watch.

  • a more useful question would be,"out of all the ways you could make money why are you thinking about this one?"

  • I mean it was genuinely good sex advice the best saliva to use as blowjob lube is 100% the thicker mucus from the back of the nasopharynx vs the thinner saliva generally produced by the mouth. And unlike most popular sex advice it's not advising anything even remotely dangerous it's genuinely just a solid point of expert blowjob technique.

  • Also, psych nurse protip - this is how you use this to talk someone out of a panic attack. Use the above conversation template plus the following nonverbals / paraverbals:

    • start by reducing stimuli (think five senses!). Reduce the noise and lights, and try to get away from any particularly offensive smells or sensations.
    • you can try to get the crowds and stimuli out of the area, but it will probably be easier to move the person panicking. Getting crowds of people to do things is very tricky. It's usually just easier to move the one person.
    • talk at about half to a quarter of your usual speed and volume
    • use common English words (no SAT vocab). Enunciate clearly, and don't use more than one conjunction / more than two ideas per sentence. Their brain can't chew / digest as much as all at once.
    • Do not stand directly in front of them and especially do not corner them. If you feel unsafe you can still stay closer to the door than they are but try to stand slightly to the side to give them line of sight to it.
    • if you want to practice / really up your game, learn to deepen your pitch slightly / resonate / speak from your chest while still keeping your volume down. Imagine James Earl Jones reading a meditation script on YouTube. This has an added benefit if you work with seniors, most age-related hearing loss is in the upper pitch ranges.
  • my usual answer when I'm suspecting some kind of boundary-pushing behavior is "well you can ask..." ...but I have to hear out my psych patients, you don't owe strangers the same obligation.

  • the counting of birthdays specifically was what was interesting to me but I'm sure it's in there somewhere.

  • this fascinates me please provide search terms for me to do additional research.

  • months. hang on Mom is trying to make me eat peas.

  • It's still going my partner is super invested because he's a huge fan of his work. Meanwhile I'm looking at this like it has huge implications for all high reliability industries including stuff like ORs, ERs, nuclear power. I have difficulty watching because I struggle with cringe humor but I'm loving the overall topic.

    I should also point out that public safety / high reliability industry workers just gotta be cringe sometimes. A plot point in one episode is that the miracle on the mojave pilot was a huge fan of evanescence and one of the most played songs on his ipod was "wake me up inside" and like. yeah I knew an ER nurse who loooved shinedown. you don't get into those industries unless you're an overdramatic bitch. (I also love shinedown).

  • I love dearmodern on YouTube and thrifted furniture

  • Also called "jetpacking" (especially if the smaller person is gassy).

  • The person who empties the urine bag has entered the chat!

  • One time I took a box of gingersnaps to coldstone creamery and had them mix it into chocolate almond ice cream. Apparently they won't do it anymore even if I bring a still commercially sealed box like I did.

  • tbh I've just accepted that superstitions are part of the human psyche. I don't believe in "chi" in the sense of some energy that can be measured but there's definitely some kind of pattern recognition in the human subconscious that's processing the flow of the environment around them and the people in it that way. And a lot of cultures worldwide have longstanding traditions that guide the way they deal with that both in the sense of soothing that part of the subconscious but also trying to address whatever threat or goal in the environment that that pattern recognition is trying to draw attention to. I really enjoyed "Feng Shui Modern" by Cliff Tan if you want a really great explanation of concrete ways in which principles of that practice tend to help people feel safer in a space. He talks about things like the most common paths people take take through rooms, wanting to have your back against something solid, and not liking having beams and lights hanging directly over your head.

    And personally I just try to keep the less concretely beneficial things to fun cultural traditions and other stuff I can connect with people around and avoid things that have been like, objectively disproven by modern science in some way or that would be specifically harmful to some specific circumstance / situation. So like carrying around an evil eye talisman is fine but using an herbal remedy that's been found to be harmful is not. And I find it's also helpful to think of it less in terms of specific effects / outcomes such as hexing, and more in terms of good energy / bad energy or good luck / bad luck. So the evil eye ward isn't protecting me from some specific thing, it's just a general hope that I'll avoid toxicity in my life. And there's a big mindfulness component to these things too; the talisman is also a reminder to yourself to avoid negativity and try to put positivity out into the world around you.