31415926535 @ 31415926535 @lemm.ee

Posts

9

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175

Joined

2 yr. ago

"Now that's what I call music" I'm embarrassed to say, I use those volumes a lot to keep in touch with younger generations, new music. Also, among the more popular torrents generally, so download fast.

I used to identify as Libertarianian. Resented taxes, overreaching, infiltrating my life, all about independence, don't want to be interfered with.

Then I became homeless. Realized how the social services, ssi, Medicare are important. Sure there are lazy people, but also those who genuinely need help, who want to get back on their feet. Care a lot more now about wanting to live in a society that actually cares about the people in it.

Cool. Tks for the reply.

If you speak from experience, fellow human: is it possible to cook dried beans if all you have is a small, bowl sized pot?

Was severe albeit functional alcoholic til age 40. AA never worked. What finally worked was harm reduction, moderation management. Medical marijuana became a thing, and just one hit of a pocket pipe of medical grade indica... good for hours. No longer needed to drink a case of beer each night.

1st few years... I'd say, I'll let myself have 8 beers this year. Next year was 6. Year after, 3. By then, triggered addiction cravings stopped happening.

So weird, how overpowering the addiction felt when I was trapped in it.

Can't afford to eat much, cuz SSI, rent increase. Kept having conversations in head, like "I can buy laundry detergent OR have food to last the month." I've lost 20 lbs past few months , after discovering how tasty white rice can be, with just a tiny bit of sesame oil, salt and pepper.

I've learned it's a necessity. If the art itself is good, well done, promotes positive thinking, etc, it's easy to look past the personal failings of the creator. Like joss whedon. Or the Harry Potter author. Nobody's perfect, and if I get super puritan about stuff, I miss out on a lot of good content.

If the art itself is shitty, offensive, hateful, harmful... nope, I'm not gonna look past that.

Roman Polanski is tricky. Dude was a horrible human. I don't want to like his movies, but The Tenant is just so darned good.

Out of sight, out of mind. If I need to clean frequently, I have to keep cleaning supplies out, easy to access. Enter a room, see cleaning supplies, oh, I should clean. Without the visual reminder, won't remember.

Keep at least 2 to 3 notebooks on hand. Always writing stuff down. I'll research, be thinking about something, but brain starts to lose focus. Write it down. Will completely forget after that. But when thought enters brain later, oh wait, I made notes...

Notepad app on phone. Anything important, will forget, so need to record.

Dbt, cbt has helped. Brain tends to be scattered, all over the place, so daily mindfulness, grounding exercises to connect to moment.

Only able to process data rapidly, large scale, all data at once. So, books with large pages, lots of data broken down, grouped for rapid assimilation.

Routines are essential. Phone always in left pocket, keys in right pocket, etc. If I put keys somewhere else, I'll freak, panic. So routine, if I start to panic, look in usual spot, wait, they're where they're supposed to be.

If out in public, at a counter, take wallet out, lay on counter.... stare at wallet entire time, not breaking eye contact, or else I'll forget it's there.

Wallet attached via chain. Small compact umbrella so I can keep in pocket, otherwise will lose it. Carbiner attached to things so it's easier to hold, not lose.

Willem de kooning. Early 20s, figure drawing instructor said my live sketches reminded him of de kooning. I'd never heard of him. Few years later, in San Francisco moma, stood in front of one of his Woman paintings, entranced. Thus my love of abstract expressionism began.

I have central auditory processing disorder, capd. Seeing a visual is instantaneous, clear, easy. People speaking is torturous, brain can't process, requires lot of work, confusion, translating. For me, visuals are external, but even external sounds become internal, physical. Activation of the limbic system, anxiety, fear, can lead to hearing voices. Prefrontal cortex, I think, is where brain stops internalizing sound as stress, fear. Why some people with adhd who hear voices take a small, mild dose of Ritalin at night. Ritalin means less limbic, less fear.

Not an answer to your question, but I think different areas of the brain process sound, visuals. Different mechanisms. I'd be interested to know if someone could shed light on this.

Artist here. Gesso makes flimsy paper more durable, better able to withstand wetness, layering. I've used spray adhesive, various liquid adhesives that can turn paper more stiff, solid, crisp. Maybe try calling an art supplies store, they might have ideas

The Cheshire cat, and much of Alice in wonderland, hit quite hard, but in a good way. Helped me see that insanity, mental health issues could be a good thing

I spent the last 8 years living in homeless shelters. I'd say at least 95% of my fellow residents were fleeing domestic violence, drug addicts, people out of jail, elderly, pedophiles, sex offenders, wide variety of mental health issues, some physical disabilities.

Mental health was the majority, so much so that shelters work in concert with mental health programs. Some short term crisis stabilization places for homeless people leaving psych hospitals.

Remember one guy in above category refusing to stay in a shelter, said it was more crowded, less freedom. Some people so beaten by bad experiences, trauma, unable to hold jobs their entire life, who'd give up, living on the streets was only stability they could muster.

It is freeing, in a way. But not as romantic, idealized as some might think.

I used to drink cold bottles of beer while showering. Very doable.

Additional facet: when I was younger, only super nerdy, tech people into coding and stuff played video games. Now tho, way more people playng phone games, video games. So games popping up to cater to people who aren't super nerdy or into tech.

Can't cite sources, just want to reaffirm. Kept running into that concept when researching game design, advertising, psychology.

Update 2 days later: Many useful comments. I now have text doc filled with apps, software, podcasts, etc to research, try out.

This posted question was weird, obscure. Could've been ignored, ridiculed. Barely slept in 4 weeks cuz hearing voices. Desperately hoping against hope.

So, small group of random internet strangers taking question seriously, offering constructive solutions instead of ridicule? You've helped a lot. Thank you.

Perfect, free even better. Will definitely look into that.

Been listening to combo of three audio files, white, pink and grey noise to block out all frequencies. 2 are youtube videos, and designed white noise loop I created in a sound editor program .

No matter how varied each sound source is, even in combo, there will be pattern variations that become predictable on repeat.

Kinda like how fremen walk on the sand in dune. Have to walk with no pattern, to not attract sandworms.

Yes! Exceptional nerdy tech. Thank you