The letter you wish you wrote.

Just think of how much back and forth must have happened for this person to be so fed up as to include this with a request for publication

I. Fucking. Love. This.

Instead, we have mailed letter bombs to four or five people we suspected of being reviewer C

Ah, inspired by the author of Boundary Functions for Bounded Harmonic Functions

Good, but saying you've sent letter bombs is a step too far. You're likely to get the FBI called on you out of spite nowadays.

As an author, mad props to M. Glass.