Got any grapes?

He's already got a job, and you aren't going to get PTSD from spinning a sign. On top of that, you can quit any time you want if you want to do something else.

You clearly have never experienced the dark underbelly of the sign spinning subculture.
- theres a whole movie script idea. i hope chuck palahnuik writes it and trent reznor sounds it.
In the military you are 4 times more likely to die from suicide than you are from being killed in combat.
The greatest threat to US military personnel is the US military.
- Suicide also kills more Americans than murder within the USA
- So the same US Military threat as about every other country, including the allies.
35k is also shit pay.
- I read it as a 35k signing bonus.
and you aren’t going to get PTSD from spinning a sign.
Unless you get hit by a car.
Still safer than the military though.
- Tell that to the Joker.
You won't get PTSD from spinning a sign, but most of the sign spinners I've known have been homeless, and you will get PTSD from being homeless. The cops alone cause all cities and towns to be hostile to your very existance
Maybe the sign spinner is a veteran too.

My brother joined up and deeply regretted it. I was 8 at the time. When I got to the age where recruiters started sniffing around I told one that I would join if I could only shoot the people Exxon wanted me wanted to shoot, I didn't want to fight for any other oil company. He called me unamerican and they never came back .

Oo. Time for my "terrible recruiter" story. This was back in the 90s, so the issues then were not the issues now.

My teacher (genuinely cool guy, but a veteran) brought in an army recruiter to talk to us. He ended literally every clause with "'n stuff." Like this:

"If you want to join the army 'n stuff, you gotta get real fit 'n stuff. You gotta get going with a good exercise program 'n stuff. But we'll get your fitness to a new level 'n stuff, plus pay for college 'n stuff."

Basically, it made me decide that I wasn't stupid enough to sign up.

Maybe your teacher brought the recruiter in to make you realize exactly that 'n stuff.
I'm pretty certain that I made an entire recruitment office hate each other for a day. Walked into the Navy office and they had me take a "mini-asvab" Literally 5 minutes later, I called out "I think I'm done!" they replied "no you aren't." One of them came in and looked at my screen and said, "Um... Guys... He's done." They told me to go talk to the other branches first to make sure that I didn't really want to be "Air Force, or something," and finally got my signup bonus, since I knew I wanted to be Navy Nuke. I wanted a good paying rate.
When I got sent to MEPS I was told that I was the highest testing applicant from that particular MEPS station since WWII. I probably should have taken that as a warning sign.
- Ha. Same test thing happened to my dad in the UK when he was called up for selective service. Handled the easy test in 5 minutes, but he was told he had to wait until everyone was done. He said the questions were like: Which is the odd one out- square, circle, triangle, elephant. And he said an hour later, there were still people trying to finish in confused frustration.
  My dad got out of service entirely. He would never tell me how.
- Dude I must have made way too good of a score on the ASVAB test in high school because the Army recruiters hassled me for years afterwards with calls and letters. I was never tempted to sign up though, and glad I didn't because we started the whole War on Terror a few years later. Several of my friends went to war and came back very different, all of them with PTSD and some with physical problems too.
- Given that they have changed testing multiple times since WW2 this is almost certainly false. Additionally a perfect ASVAB score isn't that rare, so your station probably recorded one before you.
A: I said "n'stuff" and "n'shit" waaaaaaay too much in the 90s. B: I wasn't a teenager until 2000 so.......

I'd rather spin a sign than get shot for a government that doesn't care about me.

only 35k to dodge bullets in some far off corner of the world away from your loved ones?

and they’re surprised no one is taking that offer?

That’s $35K, plus free room and board. If you have no loved ones, it’s actually a pretty decent option.
- You also need a lack of conscience to invade other countries and kill their citizens and bomb their hospitals though
- Depends on how much you value your life and independence.
- Did You miss the "bullets" part?
Lol not even close, it's 35k for someone just entering the service. If you get deployed to a conflict zone you're coming back home with 60-80k, but there's no conflicts right now so without hazard pay you'd still come back with over 50k cash for traveling through Okinawa or fucking Germany with your housing and food payed for. So for the right personality a career in the military is extremely lucrative, but it's not for everybody.
- How long to come back with that much?
I think that's a signing bonus. As in "we'll give you $35k to take this job that also pays a salary".
I tried to look up equivalent total compensation for a new recruit would be, but it looks like it's nontrivial to figure out. It's something like $25k/year, and full dental, medical, housing, food, and retirement and it's all tax exempt.
Not a bad deal for almost no prerequisites to joining, other than the "selling your freedom" and "directly contributing to violence" parts.
Kinda sounds like a good time ngl
- Weird kink but you do you

Wow, what's the job?

Shooting poor people to protect oil interests for multi-billion conglomerates.

Does it say anything about the kind of people you feel are up to the job that you're approaching a grown man wearing a chicken suit?

A ton of Americans would take the job if it only involved shooting. Thing is though, it'll also involve being shot at.
I wish I was so simple I'd think like you.
- You wish you were so simple THAT you'd think like me.
  Let me tell you something simple: If an opportunity is a good one, for employment in this example, all that has to happen is for it to be known that it exists and people will come knocking, asking to be allowed to avail of that opportunity.
  If someone comes to you and tries to sell you about how something is a good deal for you, they are the one who has something to gain, and it is going to be at your expense.

35k for a 40hr work week comes out to only $16.80 an hour. Just saying.

To be fair, for at least the first couple years, your cost-of-living expenses are also essentially zero if you're single, since you'll be staying in the barracks and eating in the mess hall without having to pay anything out of pocket. So that $35k stretches a lot further than it would outside the military.
- You also don't have much time to spend it because they keep you pretty busy. In addition there are tons of other perqs. Looking back I'm disappointed I didn't join. You get retirement very early, and you can start other jobs that you wouldn't have the opportunity for otherwise.
  I didn't want to get yelled at. That was what kept me out. Now that I get what that was about I think I could have done it for the required six weeks.
The 35k reads to me like an enlistment bonus not a base wage. You can google base wages for the US military if your actually interested. That said if we're talking the US military there isn't a chance in hell that it's a 40 hour work week. He'd be lucky for a 60 hour work week and 80 is pretty standard if your leadership sucks. I had a cot in my office I used multiple nights a week when working for a particularly dickish commander once.
There are plenty of terrible things about the military, stupid long hours, highly toxic work environment, alcohol abuse is encouraged, rape culture is accepted, etc. But the pay isn't all that bad when you add everything up (base pay, tax breaks, housing allowance, on post child care discounts, uniform allowance, free health care, dependants, re-enlistment bonuses, etc). The per hour rate isn't good but I've also never gotten the equivalent time off in PTO that I got in leave either.
There also isn't a wage gap for minorities, there's a ton of other bigotry, but no wage gap.
- Yeah, that's an enlistment bonus (up to $50k, they advertise).
  Base pay is awful. $23k to $35k p.a.
  https://www.goarmy.com/benefits/while-you-serve/money-pay.html
  More after the first three years.
Assuming you work for 40 hours.
Dunno how it works in Murica, but here in Britain you serve your duty from 00:01 to 23:59
So the equivalent of about $4 per hour...
- What do you do with your 2 minutes?
To be fair, people will also say "thank you for your service" n 'stuff
That tweet makes it sound like the 35k is a bonus for signing up "35k AND a job"
Maybe the 35k is a signing bonus?
- That'd be a damn high bonus for nearly anyone going into the military. Not that recruiters are above lying about a bonus
The pay is less than that. Probably $23k base pay.
https://www.goarmy.com/benefits/while-you-serve/money-pay.html
Enlistment bonus can be up to $50k.
- How'd you get that number?
  35000/52/40=16.8269.

Do we think conscription will be brought back if they continue not being able to find people desperate enough to join? I think it's disgusting recruiters are allowed near and in public schools.

No. We don't want conscripted soldiers. We have proven that a volunteer military will stomp a conscripted military into the dirt. See Wagner VS US in Syria ç 2017-2018
- The militaries argument is that a peer-to-peer conflict with say China would result in millions of casualties within months that would have to be replenished. You can't replenish those with volunteers.
  Still, it's highly highly unlikely that will ever happen.
The US military has more than enough people signing up willingly. The only way conscription would ever possibly get restarted is if the US was in a conflict where hundreds of thousands of soldiers were being lost. I honestly don’t even think it would be necessary then either, because the US is a giant war cult, so people would be lining up left and right to “serve their country.”
- Perception can diverge from reality. Russians were expected line up for conscription. Biggest line I know is accountants' line who want to sell their male workers(and female doctors) for 300 000₽(3k$) in bulk.
They are already laying the groundwork to bring it back.

Recruiters chase misery like sharks chase blood. That costume is probably more comfortable than the shit the army makes you wear and he can tell his boss to fuck off if he gets sick of it.

Recruiters chase misery like sharks chase blood.
I mean, accurate but Jesus Christ that's brutal haha.
And he gets paid more to wear that costume than the military one.
The scars on my mate's back from lugging their frequently hazardous nonsense around would support this.
Duck costumes also don't render you unable to have sons as every kid he and his former unit members have seems to prove.

Base pay for an E1 is $23,011.2 per year. Granted you don't have to pay for food or shelter as an E1. But. Well. Let's not pretend it's actually $35k a year.

- Seriously. I joined as a Nuke in 2000. $72,000 enlistment bonus. One year later the bonus shot up to over $200,000 once 9/11 happened.
- An enlistment bonus generally isn't included in your yearly income for the purposes of recruitment until they know for sure what rate/mos you'll be. Until then it's not something a recruiter can offer unless that enlistment bonus is available to all enlistees. And it'd still only be for the single year. They aren't giving you $75K every year of your 4-6 year first enlistment.

Coast Guard is offering $65k for anyone who wants to cook.

It's honestly a pretty miserable job, but you're not getting shot at, sooooo...

If I had to join a service (and I'm just plain too old at this point, anyway), it'd probably be the Coast Guard. Their primary mission is saving lives. One issue is that they're also an arm in the War on Drugs, and that's where shooting might actually come into play. Other issue is how they handle refugees. That said, you can still feel better about their work than the regular military.
- Many, if not most "regular military" jobs in Western armed forces don't involve front line combat and getting shot at or shooting at people. Less than 10%.
  Now obviously, you look at Ukraine and think "Well that's a lot bigger than 10%," and it probably is. But any country with a large air force, navy, and sizeable ground forces are gonna have thousands of people trained to load weapons onto planes, manage ship engines, cook, drive supply trucks, load cargo planes, cook, manage payroll, manage procurement of equipment, fly drones, cook, run propaganda and recruitment, operate medical facilities... the list goes on.
  I had an ex whose brother was going to med school to be a surgeon for the Navy. Her father, who was an Army pilot, thought it was great because he knew his son was just gonna be (relatively) safe on a carrier or hospital ship somewhere, not getting shot at, and just saving lives.
- I used to game with a former Coastie, he said roughly the same thing.
  Same GI Bill, same pension system, and you get to actually do shit most of the time you're in.
- (and I'm just plain too old at this point, anyway)
  Not sure how old you are, but the max age for active duty enlistment was raised to 42. Which, as a person who went through boot camp at 26/27 and just turned 40, is nuts.
Service industry for an especially entitled clientele? Fuck off. That's not nearly enough money.
I worked for a coast guard contractor many many years ago. It also wasnt a great job but was kinda nice knowing that I might help save lives someday.

How hot is that in the rest of the world?

306 kelvin
555.67 Rankine
Its the same amount of hot in the rest of the world, just measured in different ways.
Here's how you convert between the two:
T[°C] = (T[°F] - 32)* 5/9
32°F is 0°C which is why you need the 32 in there. For the fraction I always just try to think about whether Celsius or Fahrenheit is bigger. Accordingly, I'll need a number smaller or larger than one.
edit:
Aight I got the fraction wrong, which kinda proves that it's useless to remember lmao.
- The easy way to remember the multiplier is that there's exactly 180 degrees between boiling and freezing in Fahrenheit, and 100 in Celsius. Just use 1.8 instead of a fraction.
- That edit lol I used to know this by heart at some point in my life. Now I'm fine knowing that it exists and use software to do it for me instead
Man, come on. The ONLY time imperial makes some decent sense is temperature: for humans, 0 is really cold and 100 is really hot.
Edit: for anyone metric having a cow here, I am pro-metric. All I'm trying to say is that of all the hairbrained measurements in imperial, temperature is the least hairbrained.
- as opposed to the measurable freezing and boiling temperature of water?
- 100 is unacceptably hot. Nobody can live in that for long.
  86f peak temperature with 35% humidity? Tolerable. Especially when the sun goes down and the temp drops but the humidity stays lower than like 55%.
  But the next day of 95f peak temp followed by 76f nadir with 70% humidity overnight? People without A/C die. The homeless die.
- your right. there is no true 'objective' scale for temperature. freezing/boiling water is arbitrary and not even that consistent. for 99% of use, farenheit is better for people. the biggest advantage that celsius has, is that it is the same scale as kelvin, but thats just because it was more popular in science. the rest of metric is good tho

Man, I'm shocked that most people would rather wear a duck costume in sweltering heat than risk taking a bullet or a grenade!

Of course people dont want to go to the trenches with a rifle and helmet, they would get mud all over their duck costume

Am I the only dad (other than OP) traumatized enough to get the "Got any Grapes" reference?

Wadddle waddle and he waddeld awaaayyy
only dad
Broski the song was a popular flash animation on albino-blacksheep like 20+ years ago, so nah.
- The kids who grew up with it are dads now
I blame Wade.
- I blame Roe
So a bird saunters up to a citrus refreshment booth, and he communicates to the booth attendant, saying "hello (bom bom bom) do you happen to possess any grapes?"
The attendant returned "no, we only deal in the business of citrus refreshments, although the drinks are cool and crisp, and they were prepared in my household! Could I interest you in a serving?"
The bird returns, "I've no need."

any money quantity isn't enough when we are talking about the possibility of being killed or maimed somewhere around the globe

Hey, now. That isn't completely accurate. You can also get PTSD!
- you can also get captured and spend several years as a pow

35k AND a job? What's the 35k for then? Or does he think it's great to have a job in itself?

Btw going pew-pew on brown kids is not a job

Likely an enlistment bonus, some enlistment bonuses can get fairly large.
- Oh that's at least that
The career warfighters I have met seem to think their job is to keep everyone as safe as possible, with the enemy being kept slightly less safe.
There are many in upper levels that see things differently.
It's like you people forget there is a world outside of Iraq.

That’s the correct answer. I was shot at once and the realization in the moment… well it messed me up royally.

35000 AND a job?

So a signing bonus?

"Tanks' place is in museums,

Let them quietly rot there."

Also fuck Putin.

Welp, looks like it's back to lying to vulnerable children

Quack off

In my country, the lowest wage for the lowest rank is around $46.5K USD.

I think $35k is the signing bonus. Still not worth it, but that's a life changing amount of money for a lot of people. All by design, of course.

Why don't people want to die for oil, these days?! /sarcasm

The best sign spinner I ever saw was a pickle.

I can only hope he's contemplating the end of it. Fuck the military and every war pig.

AMAB