TIFU by contemplating pooping, near my SO
TIFU by contemplating pooping, near my SO
Today as me and my SO were coming home from a morning walk, I felt a fart coming through. As they were unlocking the door, I stood there, letting the fart slowly make it's way out.
Feeling the fart nearing it's destination, i started contemplating going all the way and just going to the bathroom. Finally, the fart leaves me, the noisy street and the distance between us was enough to ensure my stealth.
Suddenly I notice that my SO is looking at me with a slight giggle.
"Whats funny?" I ask, fearing that I overestimated my stealthiness.
"I know what you are thinking right now." They reply with a giggle.
I slightly freak out not knowing what they think I'm thinking, because in my head I had no thoughts that were related to us right now.
"What do you mean?" I ask, slightly scared
"You are figuring out if you need to poop, right?"
"What?? How TF can they know that??" I ask myself as I get flustered and confused.
Eventually they tell me that I have a "Contemplating Poop" face and that they always know if I'm considering taking a dump.
Anyway...
People don't know that this is what a healthy mature loving relationship looks like. This is the endgame where your chosen life mate knows you so well that in some ways they know you better than yourself. This is likely just one example of subtle hints they know of to judge your mood and your needs. Later it just seems like magic when your partner puts a meal down in front of you, and you just realized you're so thankful because you're famished. If you're doing a loving relationship right, you do this for them too in ways they can't understand.
Had a woman I met at a bar asked me what I would do if she ripped one. Paraphrasing, it's been 20-years, "Laugh my ass off if you straight owned it!"
She also asked my opinion on abortion. Paused a moment, and paraphrasing again, "Not my business. I'm a man." "RIGHT ANSWER!"
She was fun to date a few times, but kids, nurses can be very strange!